Hilarious Lent Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

I lent my umbrella to a hot girl yesterday. That takes the number of girls i've made wet this year to -1

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I lent a hot girl my umbrella yesterday. That takes the number of girls I've made wet this year to -1.

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I lent my umbrella to a hot girl yesterday. That takes the number of girls I’ve made wet this year to -1.

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Next year I'll give up spreadsheets for 40 days and 40 nights... It's going to be Excel Lent

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You know who's not giving anything up for lent? Rick Astley.

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I lent a girl an umbrella yesterday Which takes the total number of girls I've made wet this year to -1.

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I'm giving up negativity for lent. We'll see how long that lasts.

Edit: aware it should be pessimism. This is a serious quote from a friend who didn't realise what she'd said.

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If Wilson lent Tom Hanks $20... Tom Hanks would be Owen Wilson.

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I lent a hot girl my umbrella while it was raining That takes the amount of girls I've made wet to -1

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My mate lent me $5,000 to produce my idea of a fruit-based torch, then took all credit. He stole my limelight.

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When my granddad was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, I can still remember the very first thing I said to him. “Have you got that five grand I lent you?”

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What is the Catholic Church giving up for Lent? Answer: The Pope!

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I lent a girl an umbrella that makes the people I've made wet this year -1

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Mike Tyson had something to tell me... So I lent him an ear.

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I lent a friend of mine $10,000 for plastic surgery Now I don’t know what he looks like.

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I lent my umbrella to a hot girl yesterday And that brings the number of girls I’ve made wet this year to a solid -1

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I lent an umbrella to girl yesterday. It makes the total number of girls I have made wet this year to -1.

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Carl drives a stick **Andy:** Carl, why was the clutch in my car broken after i lent it to you?

**Carl:** Well don't you look at me, i didn't even touch the thing!

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What did Harry say to Hermione when she lent him a galleon? Thanks for the gold kind Granger!

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The saying “never lend your books, you’ll never get them back” is true I know this because my library is full of books that other folks have lent me

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I lent an umbrella to a hot girl today That makes the number of girls I've made wet this year to -1

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I just want to thank the guy who lent me his dictionary to look for the meaning of the word plethora... It means a lot

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I lent my umbrella to a hot girl today That brings the total number of girls I’ve made wet this year to -1!

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I'm giving up spreadsheets for 40 days. Excel-lent

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I’ve made a spreadsheet of all the things I’ll give up for Easter. It’s excel lent.

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Did you hear what the Pope was giving up for lent? His job.

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Lent My wife gave up intercourse for lent. I wish she would have told me. I might have joined her.

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I lent a hot girl my umbrella That makes the number of girls I've made wet this year -1

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I lent my umbrella to a hot girl yesterday. This takes the number of girls that I have made wet this year to -1.

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When is the best time to run a marathon? During Lent. That's when you fast.

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I lent my umbrella to a girl yesterday... That makes the number of girls I got wet this year -1.

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I'm giving up abbreviations for Lent. Laugh Out Loud

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I don't know if you know this, but I was raised catholic... I just gave it up for lent.

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I know what I'm giving up for Valentine's Day! Lent

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In observance of Lent this year, I am giving up spectator sports, concerts or any large gatherings... And for all my future Lents, I am giving up on retirement.

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