Riding a horse can be difficult. You could always choose to ride a mule instead... but that would be half-assed.
I like my women like I like my coffee... Tied up in a sack and thrown over the back of a Columbian mule.
I like my women the way I like my coffee Tied up in a burlap sack and slung over the back of Juan Valdez's mule.
TIL there is a cocktail named after Donald Trump Moscow Mule
My wife and I were talking about our physical relationship.
"I wish you were more of a lion," she said.
"A lion? Why?" I asked.
She said, "They are masculine and aggressive."
"I wish you were more of a mule," I said.
"A mule? Why?" she asked.
I said, "They can't reproduce."
My mule is pretty lazy... ... Always doing half-assed work.
A timid friend of mine was arrested at the border for being a drug mule. I didn't know he had it in him.
What do you call a horse that's always doing things half-assed? A mule
I ordered a horse from a rancher, but got a mule. Seems he half-assed it...
What is Mexico's National Animal? The drug mule.
An odd look... Came to the counter of the pharmacy with a box if condoms... Person ringing me up gave me a quick odd look.... I caught it and said "oh, it's not what you think... I'm a drug mule"
A mule walks in to a bar...
And sits down. The bartender sees him and says "Hey! We have a drink named after you!!"
The mule says "You have a drink named Larry?"
A battery, a mule, and a fish walk into a bar.
The mule orders a beer. "I'm off the wagon," he explains.
The battery orders a juice. "AA all the way," it says.
"And for you, sir?" The bartender asks the fish. "Water," it croaks, and collapses.
The baby is kicking like a mule So I decided my wife can no longer own that pet donkey of hers
So, a Trump voter walks into a bar...
...and sits down right in front of the bartender. The bartender glances up at his hat and goes, "Hey, we have a drink named after you!"
"What, you have a drink named Dave?"
"No, you idiot, I was talking about a Moscow mule."
What do you get when you cross a Sith Lord, and a Donkey?
Darth Mule!
A joke, from third grade me...
Happy Star Wars day!
I ordered a horse from a rancher, but got a mule. Seems he just half-assed it.
Why was the horse always mad at the mule? It kept half-assing everything.
What do you call a Caucasian mule? You guessed it, a honky donkey...
What do you get for breeding a donkey and a mule A monkey