A wife asks her newfie husband to stop by the grocery store on the way home...
She tells him, "pick up a loaf of bread, and if they have eggs, get a dozen"
He comes home later with 12 loaves of bread
How do you get a one armed newfie out of a tree? Wave.
Why was the Newfie excited when he heard Quebec might leave Canada? It wouldn't take him as long to drive to Toronto
Give a Newfie a fish, he’ll eat for a day. Teach a Newfie to fish, He’ll draw unemployment all winter long.
What is long and hard on a Newfie? Grade 1.
Do you know how the first Newfie got to Montreal? They were playing hockey on the St Lawrence and he got a breakaway.
I heard that a small Cessna crashed into a cemetery in Newfoundland. They count over 200 victims since recovery efforts started.(a joke from my newfie neighbor)
newfie joke
How did the newfie injure himself raking leaves?
He fell out of the tree
A Newfie walks into a doctor's office...
And says
"Doc b'y, I tinks I got dat H2N2 disease." Doctor replied
"ummm...don't you mean H1N1?"
Newfie says
"No b'y, dis is twice as bad as dat!"
Why do most newfie men have beards or mustaches? They wanna look just like their mothers.
How do you confuse a Newfie ?
Tell him to go into a room designed as a circle,
and pee in a corner.
How does a Newfie confuse you ?
He replies 2 minutes later "Done".