at the proctologist I was at the doctor, getting the digital rectal exam, and the doctor says: "At this point of the exam it is normal to get an erection". I said"I don't have an erection". The doctor says "No. But I do".
I went to a proctologist...
And he said to me: you need to stop masturbing.
I said: why?
And then he responds: So I can examine you.
What do you call a Jamaican proctologist? Pokemon!
What do you call a Jamaican proctologist? The Pokémon.
New Reality Show: America's Next Top Proctologist. You only advance to the next round if you get two thumbs up.
What did the proctologist say to the pirate? Show me your booty.
Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "asteroids"? Wouldn't it be more fitting if it was asteroids, I mean think about it instead of being a proctologist you would be a astronaut.
Three guys are talking, the first guy says "I'm an astronaut, so I drive a Saturn." And the second guy says, "Well, I am a pimp, so I drive a cheap Escort." And the third guy says, "I got you both beat. I'm a proctologist, so I drive a brown Probe."
What do you call a Rastafarian proctologist? Pokemon!
What did the Jedi Knight say to the proctologist? "These aren't the 'roids you're looking for."
After I had my colonoscopy, the proctologist asked if I had any questions. Apparently "Do you do birthday parties?" was the wrong answer.
Went to the proctologist ... ended up with a ;
A man goes to the proctologist The doctor gave him a thumbs up.
What do you call a semi-professional proctologist? Someone doing a half-assed job.
What do a proctologist and a prostitute who's only clients are homeless people have in common? They both spend their time at work feeling up bums.
What do you get when a proctologist runs track? Rectal pro laps
What's the difference between a proctologist and a gynecologist? The smell of the finger.
I've never felt more like a dummy ... Than when I found out my proctologist is also a ventriloquist.
Three men are talking about cars.
The first man says, “I’m an astronaut, so I drive a Saturn.”
The second man says, “Well, I’m a pimp, so I drive a cheap Escort.”
The third man says, “I have the both of you beat. I’m a proctologist, so I drive a brown probe.”
A proctologist walks into a bar... Before he sits down to order a drink, he examines the stool.
What do you call it when a proctologist has to give his sister an exam? Analysis
My grandpa claims that his was the first profession to go all digital. He’s a proctologist.
I have the best proctologist. He's able to massage my shoulders and check my prostate at the same time.
[Politics] Why can't Ben Carson help fix America's problems? He's a neurosurgeon, not a proctologist.
My proctologist gave me two thumbs up… Which I did NOT appreciate.
What do you get when you ask a proctologist for a second opinion? Two fingers.
People are always calling me a soft touch... As their proctologist, I take this as a compliment.
What does a proctologist and an astronomer have in common? When they look at Uranus, it is always on it's side.
Did you hear about that proctologist who became an English teacher? Did you hear about the proctologist who became and English teacher? He specializes in teaching analogies.
Where did the proctologist lose his passport? In Djibouti.
What did the Jedi proctologist say to his apprentice. "These are not the 'roids you're looking for"
Life is tiring being a child proctologist You're always feeling a little behind
I asked my Proctologist where I need to put my pants.... "Over there by mine" is not the answer I was expecting......
What do astrologist and proctologist have in common? They both study Uranus.
I don't care what the proctologist says, I'm beautiful on the inside as well.
Did you hear about the proctologist & psychiatrist who opened a practice together? They called it "Odds & Ends"
What did the proctologist say to the british shopoholic? Bend over, I want to see your ASOS