Solar Eclipse Jokes

I'm taking my wife for skydiving. So if you see a solar eclipse today, don't be surprised.

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Funny Solar Eclipse Jokes
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"Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?" No sun.

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Thankfully, someone created an online resource for everyone who suffered retinal damage watching the solar eclipse. It truly is a site for sore eyes.

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Know your eclipses. Earth between sun and moon: Lunar eclipse.
Moon between sun and Earth: Solar eclipse.
Sun between moon and Earth: Apoceclypse.

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Son: Dad can you tell me what a solar eclipse is? Dad: No sun

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RIP to all the vampires who got fooled by the solar eclipse.

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Fun fact: 99% of voters who live in the "path of totality" for the upcoming solar eclipse voted for trump. Which is ironic, because the *last* thing they wanted to do is make the country darker.

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Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is ? No son

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Son - Dad, could you tell me what a solar eclipse is? No sun

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A boy asks his father what is the meaning of the Solar Eclipse? The father replies "No son"

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What do you call a deaf woman during a solar eclipse. Whatever you want to. It's not like she's going to know.

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A solar eclipse is like watching a woman breastfeed in public It's beautiful, it's free, but under no circumstances should you look at it.

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What did the buffalo say during the solar eclipse? Bison...

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You can look at the solar eclipse directly Once with your left eye, once with your right eye

Edit: seriously don't. Remember to wear eye protection!

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What do people who make memes and solar eclipses over the US have in common? It takes them both 38 years to go all the way.

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My Dad is like the Solar Eclipse If i make direct eye contact he'll hurt me, but when it's safe for me to look at him he already left for milk and won't be back for several years.

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I'm really worried about the upcoming solar eclipse. Because I've always heard that once you go black, you never go back.

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You can use a cereal box to see the solar eclipse, But can they see why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch?

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The next solar eclipse will be in 2024... Three or four presidents from now.

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I am surprised Trump wanted to look at the solar eclipse today... Because if he went blind all he would see is black

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I really wish someone would have told me how long this solar eclipse was going to take. Don't get me wrong, I had been enjoying watching it, but had I know it would still be going on for this long, I would have bought a pair of those fancy NASA glasses.

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I said, “Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?” He replied, “No sun.”

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Son: Can you explain what is a solar eclipse? Father: No son. “No son” (No sun)

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“Hey dad can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?” “No sun”

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Every solar eclipse, children are often reported missing... Because the parents cannot find their sun.

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I'll never forget this solar eclipse, it'll forever be seared into my mind... ...and retinas. I really should've worn some glasses.

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What did the buffalo say during the solar eclipse? Bye sun!

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Son : Can you tell me what’s a solar eclipse dad? Dad : No son

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Why is Annie the Orphan crying? There was a solar eclipse.

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The government will be giving out special glasses for the solar eclipse It's called the no child left blind

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This monday there will be a solar eclipse at 10am... Followed shortly after by funeral proceedings for the Flat Earth Society.

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The solar eclipse was cool to look at and all... But when does this darkness go away?

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The solar eclipse is like a woman breastfeeding... You’re not supposed to look, but you know you are going to take a peek.

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Dad, can you tell me a solar eclipse is? "No sun."

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LPT: When the next solar eclipse rolls around, you can use a colander to view the eclipse. Just be sure you don't strain your eyes.

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The solar eclipse was like a one night stand I spent a whole lot of effort for two minutes of pleasure.

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