SCUBA is an acronym for Self Contained Underwater Breathing Apparatus. What you may not know is that Tuba is also an acronym... For Terrible Underwater Breathing Apparatus.
me: Can I play some music?
**uber driver:** Yeah, sure.
**me *[pulling out my tuba]*:** Do u like veggie tales?
What instrument does the uterus play? The fallopian tuba.
What adhesive can I use to fix my brass instrument? A tuba glue
How do you fix a broken tuba? With a tuba glue!
What is twice as large as a Tuba?
A four-ba.
I love it for its simplicity.
What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say about the baritone? It's not a tuba.
I realized I left my tuba in the car with the doors unlocked... I raced back as quick as I could and sure enough when I looked inside, there were two tubas.
Shakespeare was planning on making Hamlet into a musical, but there was one instrument he was undecided on Tuba, or not tuba, that is the question.
I want to start a all brass quartet with a lumber theme. I’ll call it the tuba four.
When I was a kid, I had to quit the marching band based on my religious principles. I was a real tuba leaver back then.
What do you call tuba section with only one tuba? A oneba
What is a tuba for? 1 1/2" by 3 1/2" unless you request "full cut."
How do you fix a broken Sousaphone?? With a Tuba glue
The music composer at my school is suffering from Cancer. He's in the hospital being fed through a tuba.
Why don't you want to take a tuba player on a pub crawl?
They're always three bars behind.
*I came up with this during band practice. Feel free to replace with instrument of your choice.
Accordion to one study people don’t notice when you replace any given word with the name of a musical instrument But I don’t believe that tuba true.
What's half of a tuba? A oneba.
What musical instrument is found in the bathroom? A tuba toothpaste.
What instrument found in Bathroom?
What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?
A tuba toothpaste.
How do you tune a Jedi tuba? Use the fourth.
What comes after a tuba in a marching band? A Threeba.
Arnold Schwarzenegger plays the sousaphone.
"Hey. Nice tuba."
"IT'S NOT A TUBA!"
Do you know what SCUBA stands for?
Self Contained Underwater Breathing Apparatus.
Do you know what TUBA stands for?
Terrible Underwater Breathing Apparatus.
Why couldn't the Tuba player get a date? He was too low key.
What's a dentist's favorite instrument? A tuba toothpaste
A man goes to a party
And he says to the host "I admire your gold toilet seat."
The host says "I have no gold toilet seat, but you're the man who pooped in my tuba."
My friends and I were putting together a musical score for a production of Hamlet Tuba or no tuba, that was the question