Veggie Jokes

Funny Veggie Jokes
Score: 19

me: Can I play some music? **uber driver:** Yeah, sure.

**me *[pulling out my tuba]*:** Do u like veggie tales?

Score: 16

Why can you never compromise with a veggie burger? Because they'll never meat in the middle.

Score: 10

TIFU by accidentally giving my vegetarian girlfriend my Italian Sandwich from quizno's instead of her Veggie Delight Sandwich. Oops wrong sub.

Score: 7

A fruit probably wouldn't travel to Australia But a veggie might

Score: 6

Did you hear about the line of veggie burgers released by Greta Van Fleet? They are 100% plant-based.

Score: 5

Why did the veggie band sound horrible live? Because they were missing a beet.

Score: 3

What do you call a coma ward? A veggie salad

Score: 3

What did the veggie burger say to the taco? Yo soy burger

Score: 3

What is a brain dead couples' favorite pizza? Veggie lovers

Score: 2

What happens when the nihilistic veggie molded? He didn’t carrot all

Score: 2

What do vegetarians do when they are bored They "veggie" out

Score: 2

Muhammad Ali’s son was conceived over his parents splitting a veggie platter. His name was Brock Ali.

Score: 2

What's Thanos's Favorite Veggie? Sugar SNAP peas!!!!!!

Score: 2

What was the title of the book written by the lobotomist? Veggie tales

Score: 2

What do you call someone who only eats the purest of vegetables? A veggie aryan.

Score: 1

What do you call a pig with no legs in a veggie patch? A ham and salad roll

Score: 1

What is a children's television show centered on the imaginary adventures of comatose Christians be called? Veggie Tales!

Veggie Tales!

Veggie Tales!

Score: 1

A middleaged caucasian veggie farmer walks into a club. "I hope you brought the beets, because I'm about to Turnip"
He says while 'raising the roof'

Score: 1

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