An English ship is sinking just off the German coast...
”Mayday, mayday, we are sinking!”
The German coast guard responds: ”Hello, zhis is ze German coast guard, whaz are you zinking about?”
Why didn't the coast guard save the hippy? He was too far out!
Why does the Coast Guard have a 6 foot height requirement? So when their ship sinks they can walk back to shore.
Guys wanna hear a military joke? The coast guards
Why couldn't the Coast Guard save the hippie? Because he was wayyy far out man.
The Coast Guard recently changed their minimum height requirements to 6'. That way if the boat sinks everyone can just walk to shore.
Why didn't the coast guard save the hippie? He was just too far out there, man.
The German Coast Guard receives a distress signal from an American ship...
The American captain says "Mayday! Mayday! We're sinking! I repeat, we are sinking!"
The German Coast Guard replies "Oh that's nice, what are you sinking about?"
Hans, how was your first day at the Coast Guard Station?
Not so good... Very boring it was. Very quiet, most of zee day, but zen... a british guy said he was sinking.
He was sinking?
Yes, so I asked him about what he was sinking, and he never replied. How rude!
SOS
The captain: “Mayday, mayday. We are sinking!”
The German coast guard: “What are you sinking about?”
Sinking American ship: Mayday mayday, we are sinking. Is anyone there?
German coast guard: Hello, this is ze German coast guard.
Ship: We are sinking, I repeat, we are sinking.
German coast guard: Wot are you thinking about?
A distress call comes in to Pierre at the Maine coast guard: "mayday mayday. We're 12 miles out on a capsized boat." "no can do" Pierre said, "We've got all we can do searching for regular-sized boats."
Germans make the worst coast guards
“Help help I’m sinking!”
“What are you sinking about?”
Michael Jackson Joke #4543762
Michael Jackson tried killing himself Sunday morning
by jumping off his boat.
The coast guard found him last night, bobbing up and down
on a small buoy.
Mayday, mayday, we are sinking. Zis iz za German coast guard vat are you sinking about?
An American is sailing in German waters when his boat starts to take in lots of water.
Realizing he won't be able to make it to shore, he calls the German Coast Guard.
"I'm sinking, I am sinking!"
The operator replies "Vhat are you sinking about?"
RIP Kanye West, died after what police think was his attempt to walk on water... Coast Guard attempted rescue, but say he was too dense.
The other day I was fishing for compliments The coast guard told me I was VERY good at violating provincial hunting and fishing laws
Did you know that the Coast Guard is the only branch of military with a minimum required height of 6feet? It's so if their boat sinks they can walk to shore.
Why does the Coast Guard have ultraviolet lights? To help them find missing sea men.
When I was in the coast guard, I saw a man in the water who had had his arms cut off by the mafia. Apparently, throwing a lifesaver at him was the wrong thing to do.
Why couldn't the Coast Guard save the drowning hippie? He was too far out.
I saw a boat load of illegal immigrants drowning off the coast today, so I did the right thing and notified the coast guard. I hope the coast guard found them otherwise I just wasted a stamp.
Do you know who the only bodyguard that year after year is losing their body but yet manages to not lose their job The coast guard