Contents
Contents
How do you get Donald Trump to change a lightbulb? You tell him Barack Obama installed it.
How many germans do you need to change a lightbulb? One, we are very efficient and not funny
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? One, because men can be feminists too.
How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They will never allow change, even if it makes the world a brighter place.
How many introverts does it take to change a lightbulb? Why does it have to be a group activity?
How many dead prostitutes does it take to change a lightbulb? Obviously not 8, because its still dark in my basement.
How many narcissists does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one. All he has to do is hold it in place while the world revolves around him.
How many McDonalds workers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, because they can't climb the ladder.
*Edit: Wasn't my joke, it was a friends but I can't credit him since I don't know his account name*
How many karma whores does it take to change a lightbulb?
When this gets 500 upvotes, I'll tell you the answer.
EDIT: Slightly late, but:
10: one to change it, one to post about it for karma and eight to repost it a few months later.
How many dead hookers does it take to change a lightbulb? I don't know, but it's gotta be more than three, because my basement's still dark...
How many LGBT supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?
The lightbulb is fine the way it is. Society just needs to change the way it looks at it.
Edit: Wow front page. Didn't expect this big a response.
How many clickbait articles does it take to change a lightbulb? The answer may shock you.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They’ll just shoot the room for being black
How many lightbulbs does it take to change a lightbulb?
Depends on how clumsy you are.
*There, I've killed it. Move on /r/jokes, move on.*
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Ten. One to change the lightbulb and nine to blog about how empowering it was.
One day I changed a lightbulb, crossed the road, and walked into a bar. Then I realized my whole life was a joke.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, men can be feminists too
how many Americans does it take to change a lightbulb? None; they're content to wander around in the dark pretending everything's okay.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? Two. One to beat the room for being black and one to arrest the bulb for being broke.
How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb? One. We are efficient and not funny.
How many Apple users does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Once the bulb goes out, they replace the house.
How many 'Nam vets does it take to change a lightbulb? YOU DON'T KNOW MAN, YOU WEREN'T THERE!
How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side
How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb? The lightbulb just burned out; this is not the time to discuss it.
How many Arabs does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They'll sit in the dark and blame the Jews
How many paranoids does it take to change a lightbulb? Who wants to know?
How many ADHD children does it take to change a lightbulb? Lets go ride our bikes
How many PETA members does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They don't change it. They just beat the room for being black.
How many PETA mebers does it take to change a lightbulb? mj32tAyZc2iCBdOHHZNdOpM
How many Google plus users does it take to change a lightbulb ? All of them actually . Two to hold the ladder and one to change the lightbulb .
How many people with Alzheimer's did it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.
How many binary programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? 011011110110111001100101
Why does it take many hands to fit a lightbulb ?
Because many hands make light work.
(This is my first attempt at a joke on here)
How many feminist does it take to change a lightbulb? None, because feminist can't change anything.
I asked a German the other day if he wanted to hear a joke...
I had the classic "How many ____ does it take to change a lightbulb" joke in mind.... But before I got to tell it,
He responded, "Nine"... How did he know?!?!
How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb Just juan
How many emo teens does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they would rather sit in a dark corner and cry.
How many Murdochs does it take to change a lightbulb? They were unaware the lightbulb was an issue & regret unknowingly paying to change it
How many dead baby’s do you need to fix a lightbulb Apparently more then 11 cause my lightbulb is still broken
How many Mexican guys does it take to change a lightbulb? Juan.
Why does the lightbulb get nervous around humans? They turn him on.
How many millenials does it take to change a lightbulb? (version 1) None, there's an app for that.
How many protesters does it take to change the lightbulb? Its a trick question, protestors don’t change anything
Who many policemen does take to chainge a lightbulb? None. They just beat the room for being black.
How many British-borned Indian Artists does it take to change a lightbulb? None, the lightbulb always pays the exact amount.
How many cops does it take to fix a broken lightbulb? No idea but the cops beat up the room for being black and the lightbulb for being broke
How many white men does it take to change a lightbulb One
What’s the difference between a pregnant women and a lightbulb? You can unscrew a lightbulb.
My 7yr old heard this...
How many software engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Zero, lightbulbs are hardware.
To replace the lightbulb I could either stand on a chair or get a small ladder... I chose the latter
How many cops do you need to change a Lightbulb? 20, One of them changes the lightbulb and the other 19 beat up the room because its black
How many dead memes does it take to change a lightbulb? Twenty-one.
How many Saiyans does it take to change a lightbulb? (Dragon Ball Z) Just one, but it takes a whole season.
How many dragon ball characters does it take to change a light bulb ?
Only one... but it will take a few episodes.
~~The lightbulb saga~~
How many children's TV presenters does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb and another to show one they changed earlier.
How did the hipster burn his fingertips? He was changing the lightbulb before it was cool.
How many straight men in california does it take to change a lightbulb? both of them
How many Brazilian national football players does it take to change a lightbulb? No one knows - every time they pick one up, they end up giving it away.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None. The cops just beat the room for being black
How many Vietnam vets does it take to change a lightbulb? (From a comment in this subredit) YOU DON'T BECAUSE YOU WEREN'T THERE!!!
How many PETA member does it take to change a lightbulb? Doesnt matter. PETA cant chqnge anything!
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Only a rapist would think the violation of a light socket by a foreign object is a matter to make jokes about.