Contents
Contents
How do you get Donald Trump to change a lightbulb? You tell him Barack Obama installed it.
How many germans do you need to change a lightbulb? One, we are very efficient and not funny
How do boomers change a lightbulb They dont, they just keep talking about how great the old one was
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? One, because men can be feminists too.
How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They will never allow change, even if it makes the world a brighter place.
How many introverts does it take to change a lightbulb? Why does it have to be a group activity?
How many dead prostitutes does it take to change a lightbulb? Obviously not 8, because its still dark in my basement.
How many narcissists does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one. All he has to do is hold it in place while the world revolves around him.
How many McDonalds workers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, because they can't climb the ladder.
*Edit: Wasn't my joke, it was a friends but I can't credit him since I don't know his account name*
How many karma whores does it take to change a lightbulb?
When this gets 500 upvotes, I'll tell you the answer.
EDIT: Slightly late, but:
10: one to change it, one to post about it for karma and eight to repost it a few months later.
How many dead hookers does it take to change a lightbulb? I don't know, but it's gotta be more than three, because my basement's still dark...
How many LGBT supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?
The lightbulb is fine the way it is. Society just needs to change the way it looks at it.
Edit: Wow front page. Didn't expect this big a response.
How many clickbait articles does it take to change a lightbulb? The answer may shock you.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They’ll just shoot the room for being black
How many lightbulbs does it take to change a lightbulb?
Depends on how clumsy you are.
*There, I've killed it. Move on /r/jokes, move on.*
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Ten. One to change the lightbulb and nine to blog about how empowering it was.
One day I changed a lightbulb, crossed the road, and walked into a bar. Then I realized my whole life was a joke.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, men can be feminists too
how many Americans does it take to change a lightbulb? None; they're content to wander around in the dark pretending everything's okay.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? Two. One to beat the room for being black and one to arrest the bulb for being broke.
How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb? One. We are efficient and not funny.
How many Apple users does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Once the bulb goes out, they replace the house.
How many 'Nam vets does it take to change a lightbulb? YOU DON'T KNOW MAN, YOU WEREN'T THERE!
How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side
How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb? The lightbulb just burned out; this is not the time to discuss it.
How many Arabs does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They'll sit in the dark and blame the Jews
How many paranoids does it take to change a lightbulb? Who wants to know?
How many ADHD children does it take to change a lightbulb? Lets go ride our bikes
How many PETA members does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They don't change it. They just beat the room for being black.
How many LAPD officers does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They shoot the room for being black and beat up the bulb for being broke.
How many kids does it take with ADD to change a lightbulb? Wanna go ride bikes?
How many Saiyans does it take to change a lightbulb? Find out next time on Dragon Ball Z!
How many perverts does it take to put in a lightbulb? Only one, but it takes the entire emergency room to get it out.
How many Dragon Ball Z episodes does it take to change a lightbulb? ***Find out next time on Dragon Ball Z***
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they would just tolerate the room for being black.
How many conservatives does it take to change a lightbulb? Zero. Why would you want to change things?
How many children does it take to change a lightbulb? Obviously not 5 because my basement is still dark
How many country singers does it take to change a light bulb? Two; one to change the lightbulb and one to write a song about how good the old one was.
How many divorced men does it take to change lightbulb? Who cares? They never get the house.
Why does it take many hands to fit a lightbulb ?
Because many hands make light work.
(This is my first attempt at a joke on here)
How many emo teens does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they would rather sit in a dark corner and cry.
How many opticians does it take to change a lightbulb?
Is it one, or two?
One... or two?
One... or two?
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
Trick question.
They just beat the room for being black.
How many dead hookers does it take to change a lightbulb? Apparently not 1583 cause its still dark down there its starting to smell.
How many Harvey Weinsteins does it take to change a lightbulb? That light bulb will change itself right in front of him if she knows what's good for her.
What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? You can't unscrew a pregnant woman.
How many NRA members does it take to change a lightbulb? More Guns.
How many introverts does it take to change a lightbulb? Hey! Why does it have to be a group activity?
How many "one-uppers" does it take to change a lightbulb? 5 but I have seen it done with four.
How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? Must be more than 9 cause my basement is still dark
Why did the man stick a lightbulb in his mouth? He wanted a light snack
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Who needs a lightbulb when you've got a glass ceiling?
How many midgets does it take to change a lightbulb? One. And maybe a ladder. They're short, not retarded!!!
What did the lightbulb say to the other lightbulb? Watt up
How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Not many, just Juan.
How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb? One, they're very efficient and not that funny.
How many Feminist does it take to change a lightbulb? Doesn't matter, they can't change anything.
How many LAPD officers does it take to change a lightbulb? Who knows? They just beat the room for being black.
How many software engineers does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a hardware problem.
How many saiyans does It take to change a lightbulb
1 but it takes five episodes, krillin dies and a planet gets destroyed
(Sorry for the repost)
How many self-help gurus does it take to change a lightbulb? Before I can answer that question, I have to ask "is the lightbulb ready to change?"
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, because feminists don't make change.
Edit: Can't change anything.
How many police officers does it take to replace a lightbulb? None. They just beat the room for being black.
How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb?
One.
Blondes may be dumb but they still know how to use their husband~
How many tough guys does it take to change a lightbulb? Three. One to hold the bulb, and the woah, wait... hold on a second. You looking at my girl? You looking at my girl, bro? I'll seriously knock you out.
How many vivisection researchers does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They don't want you to see what they are doing.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? One. She just stands there and holds the bulb while waiting for the world to rotate around her.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Don't be silly, feminists cannot change anything.
How many alcoholics does it take to change a lightbulb? Two. One holds the lightbulb in place while the other drinks until the room starts spinning.
How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb? One. We are very efficient and don't have any humor.
How many dead hookers does it take to change a lightbulb? Apparently not 3, it's still dark in my basement.
How many Jokes subredditors does it take to change a lightbulb? We'll find out in the comments.
How many guitarists does it take to change a lightbulb? The answer is 50. One to change the lightbulb and 49 to say they can do better.
How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? Twelve. 1 to change the lightbulb, and 11 to say "Aw, he's so brave".
What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? You can unscrew a lightbulb.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. The glass ceiling lets enough light through.
How many germans does it take to change a lightbulb?
None.
German lightbulbs are very high quality and never break.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just shoot the room for being black.
How many Dragonball Z character does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but it takes three episodes.
How many viola players does it take to change a lightbulb? None - they can't reach that high
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? A group of them, but it doesn't matter they wont change anything.
How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb? One but the lightbulb must want to change.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Just kidding, they can't change anything.
How many surrealist painters does it take to change a lightbulb? A fish!
How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They are an efficient people with no time for humor.
How many nuns does it take to change a lightbulb? Nun.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? 0, they'll just protest and hope someone else changes it to one they like.
How many dead memes does it take to change a lightbulb? Twenty-one.
How many optometrist does it take to change a lightbulb? 1 or 2? 1... Or 2? 1 or 2?
How many Saiyans does it take to change a lightbulb? (Dragon Ball Z) Just one, but it takes a whole season.
How many non-binary gender-fluent people does it take to change an LED lightbulb? DID YOU JUST ASSUME MY LIGHTBULB?
So I asked my neighbor how many babies you would need to change a lightbulb... and he told me he didn't know because his basement was still dark.
How many procrastinators does it take to change a lightbulb? Oh well, I'll figure it out later.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
They can't, cause they can't change anything.
(Just told to me by my 12 year old son.)
How many wizards does it take to change a lightbulb? Depends what you want it to change into...
How many binary programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? 011011110110111001100101
I asked a German the other day if he wanted to hear a joke...
I had the classic "How many ____ does it take to change a lightbulb" joke in mind.... But before I got to tell it,
He responded, "Nine"... How did he know?!?!
How many straight men in california does it take to change a lightbulb? both of them
How many Murdochs does it take to change a lightbulb? They were unaware the lightbulb was an issue & regret unknowingly paying to change it
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