Man, if you thought No Nut November was bad... Wait until No Net December.
What's worse than no nut November?
No net December.
Defend net neutrality.
Where are you only allowed to swim if you have red hair, a lip piercing, three brothers, a missing finger, are slightly overweight and have a birthday in december? The specific ocean.
The doctor has given me two months to live. I've chosen August and December, because I like summer but don't want to miss Christmas.
How many seconds are there in one year? 12 of them: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd, May 2nd, June 2nd, July 2nd, August 2nd, September 2nd, October 2nd, November 2nd, December 2nd.
First we had No Nut November.... Now we have No Net December.
Do you know who Russia's 3 greatest generals are? December, January, and February.
two blondes in a forest
In December, two blondes in a forest are looking for a Christmas tree. They go all around the forest for hours. Then one of them says:
"I am very tired and I am fed up with the searching - let's take some tree without the decoration."
I wasn’t going to visit my family this December, but my mom promised to make me eggs Benedict. So I’m going home for the hollandaise.
I held the door open for a feminist last month. The trial date is December 12th.
Joke from WWII: The USSR's three greatest generals. What're the names of the USSR's three greatest generals? December, January, and February!
Why are there no Finnish Muslims? All of them died out one year when Ramadan was in December
Just checked that the carton of milk in my fridge expired December 31. Unlike me, it had a date on New Year’s Eve.
December 19 was the 102nd anniversary of the death of Alois Alzheimer. But of course no one remembered.
From the death notice of a local newspaper: After a very hard and painfull life, Mr. Miller finally found his peace... The funeral of his wife Mathilda will take place on the 26th of December.
If 24th December is Christmas Eve, 23rd December should be Christmas Adam. Because men always come first.
So last year I started a tradition, I carry a pebble and throw it at anyone who sings Christmas songs before December.... I call it my Jingle Bell Rock.
When I was a kid, we were so poor.... That Mom used to cut off the bottoms of our pockets on December 24th, so we'd have something to play with Christmas morning.
What did the genetic engineer say on December 25th? Merry CRISPRmas!
I wasn’t going to visit my family this December, but my mum promised to make me Eggs Benedict. So I’m going home for the hollandaise.
When my parents told me Santa wasn't real, I was incredibly sad. But then I bumped into him at the mall last December and he cleared that all up for me! Nice joke, Dad!
December 31st of this year will be Ramones day. When 2020 has 24 hours to go.
SERIOUS WARNING! Do not go outside!
On the 31st December around 11:59pm. Do not go outside your house otherwise chances are, you will not come back until next year!!!
Please tell everyone u care for.
Who are the Minnesota Vikings' toughest opponents? November and December.
What mantra do Hindus initiate on the 25th of December? Hari Kristmas.
What did Adam say to Eve on the 24th of December? It’s Christmas, Eve.
In order to help Russia's chances at the World Cup The tournament has been moved to December.
At the court
Judge: Every one of your answers should be oral! So where were you on the 12 of December?
Suspect: Oral.
There's a place where January comes after February and December comes before September It's the dictionary
Santa on the bad list? Impossible!!! On the 1st of December a little boy called Jim sends Santa a card asking "can I have a sister for Christmas. The next day he sent one back saying "Ok Jim send me your mother".
Pope Francis warns the public about the evils of Horoscope readings...
Born: December 17, "Your ideas are abstract and don't always make reasonable sense."
What a Sagittarius thing to say...
In a few weeks it'll be all over for me and relaxing! I'll be on vacation to India in December.