Boss perv I sit at work today drinking Coke, doing some stuff with Excel tables when suddenly my boss puts his hand into my pants, jerks me off, and then goes back to his previous work like nothing happened. Being self employed has its positives.
Next year I'll give up spreadsheets for 40 days and 40 nights... It's going to be Excel Lent
A man in a job interview.
Interviewer: "This job requires you to know Powerpoint, how skilled are you with the program"
Man: "Well, I Excel in Powerpoint"
Interviewer: "Did you just make a Microsoft Office pun?"
Man: "Word."
Microsoft
Boss : How good are you at making spreadsheet?
Me : I excel at it
Boss : Was that a Microsoft office pun?
Me : word
Hey girl are you proficient in Excel? Cause I need your help spreadin’ some sheets.
Why does North Korea excel at drawing straight lines? Because they got a supreme ruler
In an interview: "How good are you with Microsoft PowerPoint?"
"I Excel at it."
"Did you just make a Microsoft Office pun, sir?"
"Word."
Edit: thanks u/Steve_Jobs_iGhost
What do an Incel and an Excel have in common? They both incorrectly assume that something is a date.
I love making spreadsheets. I excel at it.
So, I was at work the other day and...
My manager asked,
"How good are you at PowerPoint?"
I said, "I Excel at it."
He replied, "Was that a Microsoft Office pun?"
I was like, "Word."
This happened at a meeting with my boss:
Boss: How good are you at PowerPoint?
Me: I Excel at it!
Boss: Was that a Microsoft Office pun?
Me: Word.
Boss: How good are you with spreadsheets?
Me: I Excel at it.
Boss: Did you just make a Microsoft Office pun?
Me: Word
My family all makes fun of me for having a low-paying job filling in spreadsheets But I like having a job where I can Excel.
I like my women how I like the borders of my Excel cells With a thick bottom
What shirt size does Bill Gates wear? Excel.
What subject do drug dealers excel at? Methematics
First meeting
I remember my first meeting with my manager at my old job.
My manager asked,
"How good are you at PowerPoint?"
I said, "I excel at it."
He replied, "was that a Microsoft Office pun?"
I was like, "Word."
Cell references in excel are like gold diggers. If you want them to stay in the same place you have to throw some money at them.
I'm not excel-ent in my job but at least .. I know my sheet.
To the person who stole my presentation I hope you do not Excel.
Why is Excel like a hotel maid? They both spread sheets.
I'm giving up spreadsheets for 40 days. Excel-lent
I’ve made a spreadsheet of all the things I’ll give up for Easter. It’s excel lent.
In life when you start to Excel People start to spreadsheet.
I love working with spreadsheets I Excel at it.
I'm not just good at making spreadsheets. I excel at it.
You need to learn spreadsheets... if you want to Excel in life.
Where do you get a drink on Excel? ....Formula bar
X is a sign of the times But if you're in excel, it's *
What do an incel and microsoft excel have in common? Both incorrectly assume something is a date.
Mexicans used to excel at cross-country... ... but Donald Trump could be the reason they get a gold in pole-vaulting
Why does North Korea excel at measuring volumes? Because they have a Supreme Litre
So I had this school project to do last minute.. I didn’t know what to do so I took out whatever was in my pockets at the time, took a photo and put in a power point. The teacher ended up saying it was excel-lint.
Good managers, bad managers.
Good managers help their staff learn to succeed.
Bad ones force their staff to learn to Excel.
What program does accelerate your PC? Excel
To the person i stole Microsoft Office from, I have your word, that I Excel at theft.