Existential Jokes

If I had a dollar for every time I had an existential crisis Would it even matter?

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Funny Existential Jokes
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If I had a dollar for every existential crisis I've had Does money even matter

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If i had a dollar for every time i had an existential crisis... it wouldn't matter because currency is a social construct and life is meaningless

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If I had a dollar for every existential crisis I have ever had... Does money even matter?

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What do you call an existential lycanthrope? A whywolf.

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If I had a dollar for every existential crisis I've ever had... Does money even matter?

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If I had a nickel for every existential crisis I've ever had.. Does money even matter ?

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What did the dolphin say during its existential crisis? I feel that my life has no porpoise.

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Why did the existential nihilist cross the road? Who cares.

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My girlfriend laughed at me for having an existential crisis at 17. Jokes on her. She doesn't even exist!

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I saw my sister sobbing in her room, worried that her Philosophy degree might be worthless in today’s job market. I said, “Are you having an existential cry, sis?”

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My sister graduated from college over a year ago and is still unemployed... I found her sobbing on the couch so I asked, "having an existential cry, sis?"

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I was going to write a book about Existential Nihilism... But then I realized that it doesn't even matter.

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What did the Borg's existential brother say (Star Trek)? Existence is futile.

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What does a waffle call his complete existential paradigm shift? His eggo death

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Why did the aquarium have an existential crisis when the dolphins were released to the wild? It lost its porpoise.

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Why did the Existential Nihilist cross the road? No reason.

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What's the difference between a Benign Cancer Cell and Malignant Cancer Cell? One of them has an existential crisis.

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What do you call a homeopathic remedy thought to cure simply because it exists, yet has no purpose nor explanation as to why? Existential oils

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Did you hear about the dolphin who went thru a existential crisis? Turns out, he lost his sense of porpoise.

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How do you give a solipsist an existential crisis? You tell me.

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If people don't wish to discuss the cruel existential futility of all human endeavour they shouldn't say.. ...Good Morning in the first place.

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Does anyone else ever suddenly get all existential and acutely aware of their own self-awareness and that other people around you have their own consciousness? Just making sure it's not just me.

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Existential Java I mixed de-caf coffee with regular coffee and they must have cancelled each other out because now I feel nothing.

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What did the existential pig say? What ham I?

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The existential dyslexic insomniac stayed up all night wondering if there really was a dog.

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I didn’t always know about my existential crisis fetish. I just came to derealization.

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I gave someone an existential crisis last night. How?

I confessed my love, and now they wish they never existed.

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Today I failed a test and it gave me existential crisis...... It was a Captcha test.

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