If you could have dinner with any historical figure, who would you choose?
"Gandhi."
Why him?
"More food for me."
I went trick or treating as Gandhi and kept all of my candy in a hat And when someone tried to take the candy from my hat i told them "My hat my candy"
Gandhi walked barefoot most of the time, was quite skinny, and apparently had bad breath. That'd make him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis
Me: My friend reminds me of Gandhi.
My wife: He looks nothing like Gandhi!
My friend, tapping me on the shoulder: Don’t forget about Gandhi.
Why were Gandhi's remains compressed to make piles of 50 rupee coins? he said "be the change you wish to see in the world".
It took Gandhi over a month to cross the Alps barefoot, no washing, worn out, and survived only on garlic. He was a... Super-calloused fragile mystic, extra halitosis.
So you know how Gandhi walked a lot around India until he was an old, feeble man? I hear he also had really bad breath... He was a super-calloused fragile mystic hexed with halitosis.
A legendary quote by Mahatma Gandhi "History is not created by those who browse in incognito mode"
What did Gandhi say to the British, after they asked him to move? Nah, mastay
Why was Gandhi thrown out of the orchestra? He rejected the violins.
Why doesn't the fat acceptance movement have a Gandhi? No one is willing to go on a hunger strike for the cause
What'd Gandhi say when his friend told him to leave the protest? Na 'ma ste
Kennedy, Lennon, Gandhi If you don’t want you kids assassinated, don’t name them after an airport.
Why doesn't India celebrate halloween? No Gandhi
Great idea
Journalist: What do you think of western civilization?
Gandhi: I think it would be a great idea!
Dad, Why was Mahatma Gandhi bald
"Because he always spoke the truth"
"Oh! That's why woman have long hair"
Don't believe everything you see on internet. -Mahatma Gandhi
Why was Gandhi an advocate of naan violence? Because Hindus hate beef
I think I’m going to start quoting Gandhi more. “I’m hungry.” - Gandhi
If Gandhi went on a 100 day journey with no shoes or toiletries... ... he would be a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis
What do you call it when Gandhi starts a food fight? Naan violence
What did Gandhi say after his hunger strike? That was fast.
I met a homeless man who looked just like Gandhi... He said "be the change you want to see in the world... And can you spare some."
Trump made a New Year’s resolution to be more like Gandhi So he’s starting a nuclear war
A boy and his mother passed a cemetery. The boy saw a gravestone read 'Here lies an honest lawyer'. He said to his mother "I thought Gandhi was cremated."
Joke! Rahul Gandhi walks into a bar and lowers it. What does this joke mean?
What do Gandhi and Usain Bolt have in common? They both fast
The sequel to Gandhi Fasting and Furious
So what is the difference between People and Bullets?
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People miss Gandhi
What did Gandhi's coach yell while Gandhi was running in the 100 meter dash? Faster, faster!