Jean Jokes

What's the difference between Mark Zuckerberg and Jean Luc Picard? Picard didn't sell Data

Score: 70
Funny Jean Jokes
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Sylvester Stallone, Jean Claude Van Damme, and Arnold Schwarzenegger are all making a movie about classical composers. Sylvester Stallone said, "I'll be mozart."
Jean Claude Van Damme said, "I'll be Beethoven."
Schwarzenegger said, "I'll be bach."

Score: 55

There's a woman named Jean who works in my lab and everyday she comes in stinking of body odor. I don't really speak to her much and rarely say hello, usually if I pass her in the hallway I just say "Hi Jean"

Score: 16

Jean-Paul Sartre is sitting at a French cafe, revising his draft of Being and Nothingness. He says to the waitress, "I'd like a cup of coffee, please, with no cream."

The waitress replies, "I'm sorry, Monsieur, but we're out of cream. How about with no milk?"

Score: 14

What kind of jean's do Mario prefer? Denim Denim Denim.

Score: 11

What does Jean Valjean use to listen to music? Cosettes.

Score: 11

People named Jean are always clean Because the first thing they're greeted with is "Hygiene".

Score: 8

Jean's mom came home after visiting her hometown Maggie: Hey, where did your mom come from?

Jean: Alaska

Maggie: Don't bother, I'll ask her myself

Score: 7

Storm: 'Are you still dating Jean?' Cyclops: 'No, I guess you could say I'm her...' *Lowers glasses* *Optic blasts Storm into ash*

Score: 7

It seems that Dark Phoenix is doomed to fail at the box office. I guess it's in her Jean's.

Score: 7

“To be is to do”—Socrates. “To do is to be”—Jean-Paul Sartre. “Do be do be do”—King Louie

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I’m single, but I have three girlfriends. Their names are Emma, Jean, Ari.

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Why is it always a good idea to wear 'tall pants'? Because it's a practice of good high-jean!

Score: 5

What did Jean-Luc Picard say when Engineering offered to fix his electric sewing machine? Make it sew!

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What do you call a one-legged woman wearing Levi's? Jean.

Score: 5

Inspector Javert gives up on catching Jean Valjean and opens a bakery. But old habits die hard. The bread is on special, two for $6.01

Score: 5

Billie Jean is not my lover She just a girl who says that i am the one

But the kid is not my son.

He can stay over for the weekend though

Score: 5

Why was everyone in the French village inbred? There was only a shallow Jean-Paul

Score: 4

Yesterday I went into the woods to looks for sasquatchs but my Jean's were too tight You have no idea how hard it is to sasquatch with you sack squashed

Score: 4

Did you hear that the new captain of the Enterprise is a magician? His name is Jean-Luc Pick-a-card

Score: 3

Did you hear about the microbiologist who tore his pants? He had to abandon his experimments to focus on some jean splicing.

Score: 3

Did you hear about the French man who always wears denim? His name is Jean Jaquette.

Score: 3

My 8-year-old’s newest joke: What did the one-legged man with OCD say when he opened the closet? “Hi, jean!”

Score: 3

What do you call a Mormon action hero? Jean-Claude Van Darn

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I once knew a dental nurse who liked giving blow jobs and smoking weed Her name was oral high jean

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Names jokes are so Jean-Eric. It's really quite Al-Pauling.

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What do you call an unclaimed dead body in France? Jean Deaux

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Whats's Wolverine's favoirte book? 50 Shades of Jean Grey

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What is Jean Valjean's favorite restaurant? Bread Robbin'

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Why was everyone wearing pants in the water? It was the jean pool

Score: 2

I knew I was stalking my girlfriend too long.. When we ran into eachother by accident and I didn't know if I should ask "how are you?" or "is your dad still drinking because your mom moved to Paris with Jean-Pierre?"

Score: 1

I just had Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jean-Claude Van Damme and Dolph Lundgren beat me up. It was terrible. Now I'm seeing stars.

Score: 1

[Philosophy joke] You know what was really deep about Jean Paul Sartre? Nothing

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Mozart, Jean-baptistse Lully and Scarlatti preform at a bar. Everyone is on their feet in minuets

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