What's black and sits at the top of stairs? A paraplegic after a house fire.
I hate when my wife drags me to a dance class. She knew I was paraplegic when she married me.
A paraplegic got prosthetic legs for a single day before they broke. He had a one night stand.
What do you call a paraplegic who does karate? Partial Arts.
A paraplegic stole my camo shirt You can hide but you can't run!
What did the poor, unfortunate, paraplegic kid get for christmas? Cancer.
What's the difference between a paratrooper and a paraplegic? A working parachute.
Where can you find a paraplegic man? Right where you left him.
My cat and my paraplegic stepdad are so similar. Neither like being tossed in the neighbor's pool.
A paraplegic went down a runway... She made for a great roll-model.
Why didn't the paraplegic look in the mirror? He couldn't stand to see himself like that.
A paraplegic is haggling the price of a wheelchair He says "$300 or I walk"
What do you call an angry paraplegic? A steamed vegetable.
What did the deaf, mute, paraplegic get for Christmas? Cancer
What do you call a paraplegic doing karate? Partial arts.
A paraplegic gave a moving presentation on how much he misses using his legs He received a standing ovation
A paraplegic once stole my Camo pants You can’t run but you can hide!
What did the blind paraplegic child get for Christmas?
Cancer.
Happy new years folks!
What do you call it when you go down on a paraplegic? Meals on wheels
Only good thing to have come out of my accident and becoming paraplegic is realising what my dream job is Stand up comedian
What do you call a paraplegic riding on some waterskis? Skip
A Paraplegic walks into a bar.. Oh wait....
Have you heard of this new paraplegic juicy juice? It's 50% juice for 50% kids.
What do an optimist and a paraplegic have in common? They're not carried by *defeat*
What's better than winning gold at the Paraplegic Olympics? Walking
What's a Paraplegic's Favourite Hat? A snapback.
Whats the worst thing a woman could do a paraplegic on their the first date? Stand him up
What do you call a fashionable paraplegic? A trendsitter.
What do you call a paraplegic pot head: A baked potato.
I tried doing stand up comedy as a paraplegic It didn’t work out
What did the paraplegic 8 year old get for Christmas? #Cancer.
My paraplegic friend calls residents of Asian countries "Chinas", "Japans", "Taiwans", etc. I think he's a little weak in the 'nese.
What did the paraplegic rapper call himself? Twooo canes
In high school I got sent to the principal for making fun of the paraplegic kid. He asked if I would like to explain why I would do such a thing. I replied "It was just some armless teasing."
What do you call a paraplegic Italian? Mute
My paraplegic son was complaining about how people pick on him all of the time. I told him to stand up for himself.
What do you call a paraplegic time traveller? Marty McSit.
What do you call a paraplegic's cell phone? A can't walkie talkie