Jewish Jokes

Contents

Funniest Jewish Jokes

Funny Jewish Jokes

Why do Jews get Circumcised? Because Jewish women refuse to touch anything that isn't at least 10% off

Why are all Jewish men circumcised? Because Jewish women won't touch anything that's not 10% off

Why are circumsized penises so popular among Jewish girls? They love anything that's 15% off

Just a joke lol please don't kill me with the downvotes

A teacher asks the class, “What are some examples of flammable objects?” and the Jewish student raises his hand. The teacher replies, “Very good! Any other examples?”

I met a Jewish girl today and she asked for my number I told her we use names here

A waiter walks up to a table full of Jewish women dining And says "ladies, is anything ok?"

Why do Jews get circumcised? Because Jewish women won't touch anything that's not at least 10% off.

I told my buddy that Jewish people call god by a different name He was like, "No way!"

I was like, "Yahweh"

A while ago I had a blind date with a Jewish girl She asked me for my number.

I told her that we usually use names.

Why do Jewish men get circumcised as youth. Jewish women won't touch anything that's not at least 10% off.

A Jewish girl asked for my number ​

I told her we use names now.

No matter who wins the presidential election, it will be historic. We'll either have the first female president, the first Jewish president, the first Canadian president, or the last president.

I had a date with a jewish girl. After date she asked me for a number.

I told her we don't have numbers, we have names.

Why are Jewish men circumsised? Because Jewish women only touch things 20% off.

I came up with this joke during lunch break: What do you call a jewish obstacle course? Shlalom

Why do Jewish men get circumcised? because Jewish women won't accept anything unless it has at least 20% off.

A Jewish woman gets up mid-flight to the US and shouts: "Is there a doctor here?" A nice, serious guy approaches her quickly and tells her: "I am. What is the problem?"

She replies: "Do you want to meet my daughter?"

A group of Jewish women are eating at a diner. Their waitress walks by and asks "Is anything alright?"

I told my friend that Jewish people call God by a different name. He said, "No way!", to which I replied, "Yahweh".

Why do jews get their penises circumcised? Because Jewish girls won't touch anything that's not 10% off

Why are all Jewish men circumsized? Because Jewish women won't touch anything that isn't 10% off

I met a Jewish girl today. She asked for my number. I told her we use names here.

A Jewish Black kid walks up to his dad and asks if he is more Black than Jewish. "Why son?" The dad asks.
"Because there is a kid at school selling his bike for $50 and I was wondering if I should talk him down to $30 or just steal it."

Why don't Jewish girls study on their period? Concentration Cramps

What is the objective of jewish football? To get the quarter back.

How does a Jewish mother change a lightbulb? "No, that's all right. I'll just sit here in the dark."

Do you know why Jewish men are circumcised? Because Jewish women won't touch anything unless it's ten percent off.

Why are Jewish Men Circumcised? Because Jewish women don't touch anything unless it's 20% off!

What's the point of Jewish football? To get the quarter back.

Why do jewish men get circumcised? Because a jewish woman wouldn't touch anything unless it's 20% off.

I farted in front of my Jewish friend... He glared at me.

I said, "What? A little gas never killed anyone !"

TIL that at age 13 Jewish girls have a Bat Mitzvah and at age 15 Latina girls have a... Baby shower.

What do you call a Jewish clown? Pennywise

1948; "Did you hear,the Jewish people finally got their own country? Is this real?" "Yes,it is real!" My best original joke, taa daaa. !!!

I Farted... I farted infront of my Jewish friend and he got offended, i shrugged and said "what? A little gas never killed anyone"

Why do Jewish fathers have their sons circumcised?

They know Jewish women can't resist anything with 10% off.

This might be offensive, but what do you call a jewish pokémon trainer? Ash.

Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because Jewish women refuse to touch anything that isn't at least 10% off

A Little Black Jewish Boy says to his father, "daddy, am I more black or more Jewish?" Why do you ask? Says the dad.
The boy says, "well a guy at school has a bike for sale for $150 and I can't decide if I should haggle him down to $75 or just steal it"

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New Jewish Jokes

I met a Jewish woman and she asked me for my number I told her we use names here.

How does a Jewish person make tea? Hebrews it

How does my Jewish friend make tea? Hebrews it.

My coworker was showing off a tattoo, and I said I couldn't get any for myself. I said, "if I got a tattoo, I couldn't be buried in a Jewish cemetery."

"Oh! I didn't know you were Jewish!"

"I'm not. That's the third reason I couldn't be buried in a Jewish cemetery."

Who led the Jewish people across a semi permeable membrane? Os-Moses.

Why do Jewish men have to be circumsized? Because a Jewish woman won’t touch anything unless it’s 20% off.

How does a Jewish man make coffee? He brews

A Jewish boy comes home from school and tells his mother he has a part in the play. She asks, "What part is it?" The boy says, "I play the part of the Jewish husband."
"The mother scowls and says, "Go back and tell the teacher you want a speaking part."

How does a Jewish person make beer? Hebrew

Teacher : “Alright who can name a flammable material?” Jewish Kid : “ME! ME! ME!”

Teacher : “Okay what else?”

Why do Jewish women like circumcised men? It’s 20% off

Jewish Joke: I met a Jewish girl and she asked for my number I told her we use names here....

This Jewish girl asked for my number. I told her, here in the US we go by names.

A Jewish girl asked me for my number the other day. I told her "we use names here".

A Jewish kid asks his dad for $5... "$4?! What do you need $3 for?"

In an attempt to appeal to a wider audience, Hollywood remakes footloose for the Muslim and Jewish world Its basically the same movie, just without Bacon

Luck of the jewish means waking around the middle east for 40 years and settling in the only place with no oil.

What do you call a Jewish bread that the Black Panther bakes for Thor's party? T'calla's challah for the Val'Halla gala.

I dates a jewish girl once When she asked for my number, I said "We have names".

I met a Jewish girl and she asked me for my number. I told her we use names here

I met a jewish girl once and asked for her number. She said they had names nowadays.

A Jewish girl asked for my number... I told her we use names here.

What does a Jewish pirate say? Ahoy-vay!

I met a Jewish girl and she wanted my number I simply told her we use names here

I met a Jewish girl and she asked for my number. I told her that we use names around here.

Hitler went to a fortune teller and asked her.... "On what day will I die?" The seeress assured him that he would die on a Jewish holiday. "Why are you so sure of that?" Demanded Hitler.

"Any day" she replied "on which you die will be a Jewish holiday."

I met a Jewish girl and she asked me for my number. Had to explain to her that we use names here. It was a pain.

Why are all jewish boys circumcised? Because jewish women love things 20% off.

What is a Jewish person's favorite letter? not Z

A jewish girl gave me her number today I told her: we use names here miss

I met a beautiful jewish girl today and she asked me for my number I told her we use names here.

Why do Jews have circumcision? Because the Jewish women will take anything that's 10% off

A Jewish girl asked me for her number I told her we use names here

Have you ever had Jewish Coffee? I heard Israeli good!

Today I saw the most beautiful Jewish girl in my life She Israeli preety.

My Jewish friend is going to open a coffee shop. Suggested he name it Hebrew.

Had a Jewish girl approach me and ask for my number... I told her **we use names** around here

Hitler went to a fortuneteller and asked her: "On what day will I die?" The fortuneteller assured him that he would die on a Jewish holiday.

"Why are you so sure of that?" Asked Hitler.


"Any day", she replied, "on which you die will be a Jewish holiday".

I met a Jewish Girl over the weekend... We hit it off and she asked me for my number, but I told her we use names here.

A jewish girl asked for my number I told that where I live we use names

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Long Jewish Jokes

A Jewish man decides his son isn't religious enough, so he pays for him to go visit Israel...

When his son comes back, however, he says he's now a Christian.

Exasperated, the man goes to his friend for advice, but his friend says, "that's funny, I sent my son to Israel last year and when he came back, he also said he was Christian."

The two men decide to speak to their rabbi about this, but when they explain the situation the rabbi says, "that's funny, two years ago I sent my son to Israel, and he also came back a Christian."

The three men decide only God can have the answer, so they pray. The rabbi says aloud "dear God, all three of us sent our sons to Israel, and all of them came back Christian."

God's voice booms down, "that's funny…"

A Jewish man on the subway is reading an Arab newspaper.

A friend of his, who happened to be riding in the same subway car, noticed this strange phenomenon. Very upset, he approached him. “Moshe, have you lost your mind? Why are you reading an Arab newspaper?”

Moshe replied, “I used to read the Jewish newspaper, but what did I find? Jews being persecuted, Israel being attacked, Jews disappearing through assimilation and intermarriage, Jews living in poverty. So I switched to the Arab newspaper. Now what do I find? Jews own all the banks, Jews control the media, Jews are all rich and powerful, Jews rule the world. The news is so much better!”

An Italian funeral

A Jewish man was leaving a convenience store with his espresso when he noticed a most unusual Italian funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A black hearse was followed by a second black hearse about 50 feet behind the first one. Behind the second hearse was a solitary Italian man walking a dog on a leash. Behind him, a short distance back, were about 200 men walking in single file.

The Jewish man couldn't stand the curiosity. He respectfully approached the Italian man walking the dog and said: "I am so sorry for your loss, and this may be a bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen an Italian funeral like this. Whose funeral, is it?"

"My wife's."

''What happened to her?"

"She yelled at me and my dog attacked and killed her."

He inquired further, "But who is in the second hearse?"

“My mother-in-law. She came to help my wife and the dog turned on her and killed her also."

It was a very poignant and touching moment of Jewish and Italian brotherhood. Silence passed between the two men.

The Jewish man then asked "Can I borrow the dog?"

The Italian man replied, "Get in line."

Hitler went to a fortune teller and asked her

“on what day will I die?” The fortune teller assured him that he would die on a Jewish holiday. “Why are you so sure of that?” demanded Hitler. “Any day”, she replied, “on which you die will be a Jewish holiday”.

A Jewish man on the subway is reading an Arab newspaper

A friend of his, who happened to be riding in the same subway car, noticed this strange phenomenon. Very upset, he approached him. "Moshe, have you lost your mind? Why are you reading an Arab newspaper?" Moshe replied, "I used to read the Jewish newspaper, but what did I find? Jews being persecuted, Israel being attacked, Jews disappearing through assimilation and intermarriage, Jews living in poverty. So I switched to the Arab newspaper. Now what do I find? Jews own all the banks, Jews control the media, Jews are all rich and powerful, Jews rule the world. The news is so much better!"

Several centuries ago, the Pope decreed that all the Jews had to convert to Catholicism or leave Italy. There was a huge outcry from the Jewish community, so the Pope offered a deal.

Several centuries ago, the Pope decreed that all the Jews had to convert to Catholicism or leave Italy. There was a huge outcry from the Jewish community, so the Pope offered a deal. He'd have a religious debate with the leader of the Jewish community. If the Jews won, they could stay in Italy; if the Pope won, they'd have to convert or leave.

The Jewish people met and picked an aged and wise Rabbi to represent them in the debate.

However, as the Rabbi spoke no Italian, and the Pope spoke no Hebrew, they agreed that it would be a 'silent' debate.

On the chosen day, the Pope and the Rabbi sat opposite each other

The Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers.

The Rabbi looked back and raised one finger.

Next, the Pope waved his finger around his head. The Rabbi pointed to the ground where he sat.

The Pope brought out a communion wafer and a chalice of wine.

The Rabbi pulled out an apple.

With that, the Pope stood up and declared himself beaten and said that the Rabbi was too clever. The Jews could stay in Italy!

Later the cardinals met with the Pope and asked him what had happened. The Pope said, 'First I held up three fingers to represent the Trinity. He responded by holding up a single finger to remind me there is still only one God common to both our beliefs.' 'Then, I waved my finger around my head to show him that God was all around us. He responded by pointing to the ground to show that God was also right here with us.' 'Finally, I pulled out the wine and wafer to show that God absolves us of all our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of the original sin.' 'He bested me at every move and I could not continue!'

Meanwhile, the Jewish community gathered to ask the Rabbi how he had won. 'I don't have a clue!!!' the Rabbi said. 'First, he told me that we had three days to get out of Italy, so I gave him the finger.' Then he tells me that the whole country would be cleared of Jews, so I told him that we were staying right here. 'And then what?' asked a woman. 'Who knows...' said the Rabbi. 'He took out his lunch, so I took out mine!'

An old Jewish man was finally allowed to leave the Soviet Union, to emigrate to Israel.

When he was searched at the Moscow airport, the customs official found a bust of Lenin.

Customs: What is that?

Old man: What is that? What is that?! Don't say "What is that?" say "Who is that?" That is Lenin! The genius who thought up this worker's paradise!

The official laughed and let the old man through.

The old man arrived at Tel Aviv airport, where an Israeli customs official found the bust of Lenin.

Customs: What is that?

Old man: What is that? What is that?! Don't say "What is that?" say "Who is that?" That is Lenin! The sonofabitch! I will put him on display in my toilet for all the years he prevented an old man from coming home.

The official laughed and let him through.

When he arrived at his family's house in Jerusalem, his grandson saw him unpack the bust.

Grandson: Who is that?

Old man: Who is that? Who is that?! Don't say "Who is that?" say "What is that?" That, my child, is eight pounds of gold!

A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane...

He soon realized she was heading straight towards his seat … As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his.
Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out, ” Business trip or pleasure?”
She turned, smiled and said, “” Business. I’m going to the Annual Nympho- maniacs of America Convention in Boston .”
He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs.
Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, “What’s your business role at this convention?”
” Lecturer,” she responded. ” I use information that I have learned from my personal experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality.”
“Really?” he said. ” And what kind of myths are there?”
“Well,” she explained,” one popular myth is that African-American men are the most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is that Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Jewish descent who are the best. I have also discovered that the lover with absolutely the best stamina is the Southern Redneck.”
Suddenly the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed. ” I’m sorry,” she said, ” I shouldn’t really be discussing all of this with you. I don’t even know your name…”
“Tonto,” the man said, “Tonto Goldstein, but my friends call me Bubba.”

The Muslim Ban

Several centuries ago, the Pope decreed that all Muslims had to convert to Catholicism or leave Italy. There was a huge outcry from the Muslim community, so the Pope offered a deal. He'd have a religious debate with the leader of the Muslim community. If the Muslims won, they could stay in Italy; and if the Pope won, they'd have to convert or leave.

The Muslim people met and picked an aged and wise Mufti to represent them in the debate. However, as the Mufti didn't speak Italian, and the Pope didn't speak Arabic, they agreed that it would be a "silent" debate.

On the chosen day the Pope and Mufti sat opposite each other. The Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers. The Mufti looked back and raised one finger. Next, the Pope waved his fingers around his head. The Mufti pointed to the ground where he sat. The Pope brought out a communion wafer and a chalice of wine. The Mufti pulled out an apple. With that, the Pope stood up and declared himself beaten and said that the Moulana was too clever. The Muslims could stay in Italy.

Later the cardinals met with the Pope and asked him what had happened. The Pope said, "First I held up three fingers to represent the Trinity. He responded by holding up a single finger to remind me there is still only one God! Then, I waved my finger around my head to show him that God was all around us. He responded by pointing to the ground to show that God was also right here with us. I pulled out the wine and wafer to show that God absolves us of all our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of the original sin. He beat me at every move and I could not continue!"

Meanwhile, the Muslim community gathered to ask the Mufti how he'd won. "I haven't a clue," the Mufti said. "First, he told me that we had three days to get out of Italy, so I gave him as they call it 'the finger.' Then he tells me that the whole country would be cleared of Muslims and I told him that we were staying right here!" "And then what?" asked a woman. "Who knows?" said the Mufti. "He took out his lunch so I took out mine."

Edit: First time I heard this joke was around a year ago, but I had never heard the Jewish one until shortly after. So yeah, I'm well aware it's a repost, but, obviously by the votes, not that many people heard it the first time around (or second, third...fifth...twenty-second...etc.) so thank you, but it has already been pointed out.

The first Jewish President of the United States is elected.

The night before the inauguration he calls his mother.

"Mom, I'd love for you to come visit and stay with me during the inauguration and for a few days."

"Oh I don't know, airfare is so expensive these days."

"Mom, I'll fly you out on Air Force One!"

"Oh, but you know, cab fare is ridiculous."

"Mom, the Presidential motorcade will drive you here."

"But accommodations, especially during the inau---"

"MOM!! I'll put you in the Lincoln bedroom itself!!"

She reluctantly agrees, hangs up and starts talking to her friend.

"Who was that?"

"My son."

*gasp* "The doctor??"

"No, the other one."

A Jewish man sends his son to Israel to live there for a while . . .

A Jewish man sends his son to Israel to live there for a while. Eventually he returns home and he is now a Christian. The man finds this to be odd and mentions it to his friend.

The friend listens, thinks for a moment and says, "That's odd. I sent my son to Israel as a Jew and he returned as a Christian." So the two of them went to see the Rabbi.

They told the Rabbi the story of how they had both sent their sons to Israel as Jews, and how both sons had returned as Christians. The Rabbi listened, thought for a minute and then said "That's odd. I also sent my son to Israel as a Jew and he returned as a Christian."

So the three of them decide to go to Israel to find out what's going on over there. The arrive and go straight to the Western Wall to pray. They explain to God all about how they sent their sons to Israel as Jews and how the all returned as Christians."

There is a long silence, and then God begins to speak saying, "That's odd . . . "

A Jewish businessman in Brooklyn

A Jewish businessman in Brooklyn decided to send his son to Israel to absorb some of the culture of the homeland.
When the son returned, the father asked him to tell him about his trip.
The son said, "Pop, I had a great time in Israel. Oh, and by the way, I converted to Christianity."
"Oh, my," said the father. What have I done?"
He decided to go ask his old friend Jacob what to do.
Jake said, "Funny you should ask. I too sent my son to Israel, and he also came back a Christian. Perhaps we should go see the rabbi and ask him what we should do."
So they went to see the rabbi.
The rabbi said, "Funny you should ask. I too sent my son to Israel. He also came back a Christian. What is happening to our young people?
The three of them prayed and explained what had happened to their sons and asked God what to do.
Suddenly a voice came loud and clear from Heaven.
The Voice said, "Funny you should ask. I, too, sent my Son to Israel...

Edit: Wow, I didn't expect these many upvotes. Also my first gold. Thank you stranger.

A Jewish businessman decided to send his son to Israel...

A Jewish businessman decided to send his son to Israel to absorb some of the culture of the homeland. When the son returned, the father asked him to tell him about his trip. The son said, "Pop, I had a great time in Israel. Oh, and by the way, I converted to Christianity." "Oh, my," said the father. What have I done?" He decided to go ask his old friend Jacob what to do. Jake said, "Funny you should ask. I too sent my son to Israel, and he also came back a Christian. Perhaps we should go see the rabbi and ask him what we should do." So they went to see the rabbi. The rabbi said, "Funny you should ask. I too sent my son to Israel. He also came back a Christian. What is happening to our young people? The three of them prayed and explained what had happened to their sons and asked God what to do. Suddenly a voice came loud and clear from Heaven. The Voice said, "Funny you should ask. I, too, sent my Son to Israel...

An anti-semite is drinking in a bar

An anti-semite is drinking in a bar. He notices a Jew sitting at a table nearby and doesn't like it.

"Bartender!" he says, nodding at the Jew, "A round of the good stuff for everyone except him!"

Everyone happily receives a glass of premium scotch.

The anti-semite looks over at the Jew with a smug grin.

The Jew smiles back.

The anti-semite loses his satisfied expression.

"Bartender! Give everyone a drink of your finest, plus an appetizer!"

He looks directly at the Jew and adds, "Everyone except the Jew."

The Jewish man looks at the anti-semite, and smiles again.

Furious, the anti-semite says, "Is that Jew just stupid or pretending to be?"

"Oh no, sir, he's the owner."

The Jewish Elbow

A Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife.

"You come to the front door of the apartment. I am in apartment 301.
There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301.
I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell."

"Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?”

"What...you coming empty handed?"

A 90 year old Holocaust survivor told me this joke.

Two Jewish guys are walking when one notices a sign on a Catholic church that says "Convert to Christianity, and we'll give you $100."

The one says to the other, "should we do it??"
The other says "NO!! Are you crazy?"
The first guy replies "Hey, a hundred dollars is a hundred dollars... I'm gonna do it."
So he walks in to the church, and little while later, he walks back out. The friend says "well, did you get the money?"
He replies "Oh that's all you people think about, isn't it??"

A long time ago, the Pope decrees that all Jews in the Vatican must convert or leave...

There was an outcry from the Jewish community, so the pope offered a deal: He would have a religious debate with the leader of the Jewish community. If the Jews won, they could stay in Italy. If the pope won, they would have to convert or leave.

The Jewish people picked an aged, wise rabbi to represent them in the debate. However, as the rabbi spoke no Italian, and the pope spoke no Yiddish, they agreed that it would be a 'silent' debate.

On the chosen day the pope and rabbi sat opposite each other.

The pope raised three fingers. The rabbi looked back and raised one finger.

Next, the pope waved his hands around in the air. The rabbi pointed to the ground where he sat.

The pope brought out a communion wafer and a chalice of wine. The rabbi pulled out an apple.

With that the pope stood and declared that he was beaten. The rabbi was too clever. The Jews could stay.

Later the cardinals met with the pope and asked him what had happened.

The pope said, "First I held up three fingers to represent the Trinity. He responded by holding up one finger to remind me there is still only one God common to both our beliefs. Then, I waved my hands around to show him that God was all around us. He responded by pointing to the ground to show that God was also right here with us. I pulled out the wine and water, to show that God absolves us of all our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of the original sin. He had beaten me at every move and I could not continue. He had an answer to everything. How could I continue with my decree after that?"

Meanwhile, the Jewish community gathered to ask the rabbi how he had won.

"First," said the rabbi, "he said to me that we had three days to get out of Italy, so I gave him the finger. Then he tells me that the whole country would be cleared of Jews and I said to him that we were staying right here."

"And then what?" asked a woman.

"Who knows?" said the Rabbi. "He took out his lunch, so I took out mine."

The little black jewish boy...

A black Jewish boy runs home from school one day and asks his father, “Daddy, am I more Jewish or more black?” The dad replies, “Why do you want to know, son?” “Because a kid at school is selling a bike for $50 and I want to know if I should talk him down to $40 or just steal it!”

Back in the days of the Soviet Union, a Jewish man living in Moscow applies to move to Israel.

At 3:00 AM there’s banging on his door. It’s the KGB.

“You! Jew! You applied to move to Israel?” He nods.

“Here in Russia, don’t you have food to eat?”


“Yeah, I can’t complain.”


“And here in Russia, don’t you have place to live?”


“Yeah, yeah, I can’t complain.”


“And here in Russia, don’t you have job to work at?”


“Yeah, I can’t complain.”


“So, Jew, why did you apply to move to Israel?”

“Because *There* I can complain!”

The Jewish Samurai

There once was a powerful Japanese emperor who needed a new chief samurai. So he sent out a declaration throughout the entire known world that he was searching for a chief.

A year passed, and only three people applied for the very demanding position: a Japanese samurai, a Chinese samurai, and a Jewish samurai.

The emperor asked the Japanese samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be the chief samurai. The Japanese samurai opened a matchbox, and out popped a bumblebee. Whoosh! went his sword. The bumblebee dropped dead, chopped in half.
The emperor exclaimed, "That is very impressive! “The emperor then issued the same challenge to the Chinese samurai, to come in and demonstrate why he should be chosen. The Chinese samurai also opened a matchbox and out buzzed a fly. Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh, whoosh! The fly dropped dead, chopped into four small pieces.
The emperor exclaimed, "That is very impressive!"
Now the emperor turned to the Jewish samurai, and asked him to demonstrate why he should be the chief samurai. The Jewish Samurai opened a matchbox, and out flew a gnat. His flashing sword went Whoosh! But the gnat was still alive and flying around.

The emperor, obviously disappointed, said, "Very ambitious, but why is that gnat not dead?"
The Jewish Samurai just smiled and said, "Circumcision is not meant to kill."

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