Pennsylvania Jokes

Advice from my father Son, you need a woman who can cook, a woman who can clean, a woman that is great in bed. Most importantly, you must make sure these three women never meet.


Happy Saturday night from Pennsylvania

Score: 142

What did Sean Connery say when he noticed that there wasn't any electricity in the Pennsylvania countryside? "Shomething'sh Amish..."

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Where does Dracula buy his pencils? Pennsylvania.

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Where do pens and pencils go on vacation? Pennsylvania

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There is rumor of a new "Amish Flu" out of Pennsylvania... the symptoms are low grade fever, and you will get a little hoarse and Buggy.

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Why does no one own an Xbox in Pennsylvania? Because it's always Sony in Philadelphia!

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Where did the pencil go on vacation? Pennsylvania.

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What does a police officer in rural Pennsylvania say when he sees suspicious behavior? "Hmm, something's Amish here."

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The US High court has made a major decision to allow Pennsylvania to count and receive mailed votes up to 9 days after the midnight poll close They’re really Biden their time

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Pennsylvania and New Jersey changed their state mottos today in order to cut their highway budgets. Now they both proudly display "Road Work Ahead. Expect Delays" on their welcome signs to better reflect the status of their roadways.

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Q: Where does Dracula get his writing utensils? A: Pennsylvania

xoxo

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EVICTED FAMILY NEEDS HELP MOVING! MUST BE OUT BY JANUARY 20th! Please send any unneeded moving supplies to:

1600 Pennsylvania Ave NW

Washington, DC 20500

Score: 3

Donald Trump says he went to the University of Pennsylvania, but I could have sworn he went to Syracuse. Because he sure is an Orange Man.

Score: 2

Whats the worst joke you can play on an American? Two pies to the face and one somewhere in a field in Pennsylvania.

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Where is the world's biggest pencil factory? In Pennsylvania.

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What do you call an uncredited writer in urban northwest Pennsylvania? An Erie ghost writer.

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Funny Pennsylvania Jokes
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Are you from Pennsylvania? Cause I wanna put my Pennsyl in your Vania.

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Girl, are you Allentown Pennsylvania Because I would never come to you.

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What’s the difference between fedex, and a woman from Pennsylvania? One costs $14.95 and delivers overnight, and the other delivers packages.

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"Youngling" in German is "Yuengling" which means that Obi Wan actually saw Anakin pounding beers and trying to buy a Pennsylvania lager in Germany will get you arrested.

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What do you call an Amish Vampire? a Pennsylvania Dutch with a Transylvania Touch.

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Where do pencils go on vacation? Pennsylvania

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Where did the vampire go when he wanted to learn how to draw? Pennsylvania

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What do you call a child molester in Pennsylvania? A Nittany Lion

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Where is the largest pencil in the world? Pennsylvania, USA !

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Why is it taking so long to hear the results from Pennsylvania? Because the Amish deliver everything by horse

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What do Pennsylvania and waffles have in common Both turn blue under certain conditions

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After taking the lead in Pennsylvania and Georgia, why hasn't Joe declared victory? Because he's Biden his time.

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What do you call a transgender person from Pennsylvania? Pennsylvanian.

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