Marvel's greatest villain is Thanos. DC's greatest villain is Rotten Tomatoes.
Why was the necrophiliac depressed? His rotten girlfriend split on him.
I like my women like I like my apples... Rotten to the core and easy to smash
Why shouldn't you hang out with zombies? They make rotten friends
What do you call 144 rotten eggs? Gross.
Why is the number 288 like a rotten corpse? It's two gross.
Why do people give rotten food to Victor? Because to the victor go the spoils.
My girlfriend is always getting annoyed that I have a rotten sense of direction I finally snapped, packed up my things and right.
A German went to the store to pick up some eggs. But all the eggs at the store were rotten. I guess you could say it was a bad yolk.
I tried singing for my supper today. Looks like I'm having rotten tomato soup tonight.
What do a brat and an expired banana have in common? They're both spoiled rotten
If Robbie Rotten's "We are number one" is a meme.. Does that make one a musical number?
What do /r/jokes and Rotten Tomatoes have in common? The real joke is always in the comments.
The iPhone 7 and later models don't have a 3.5mm headphone jack. What do you call them? ROTTEN APPLES!!
Did you hear the one about the evil tuna? He was rotten to the albacore.
What do you call a rotten lamb chop? Food gone ba-a-a-a-a-ad.
A botfly larva enters a bar..
.. and says "I'll have a shot of whisky and a lump of rotten meat please".
"Are you sure you want rotten meat?"
"Want it? I encyst on it!"
What do you call a rotten gourd? A squishy squash.
Hotel Rwanda got a 90% rating on Rotten Tomatoes... But their rating on Yelp was terrible.
What did Robbie Rotten say when he hacked into the Pentagon? *Look at this net, that I just found.*
How did the judge find out about the rotten milk? There was odor in the quart
Wrong Excuse
"Armstrong," the boss said, "I happen to know that the reason you didn't come to work yesterday was that you were out playing golf."
"That's a rotten lie!" Armstrong protested. "And I have the fish to prove it!"
Just because you like a movie that has a terrible rating on "Rotten Tomatoes" doesn't mean the film is underrated.... It means you have bad taste
What did the police officer say to the perp holding a rotten, purple vegetable?
Drop that funky beet!
What did the police officer say to the perp holding Allen Ginsberg?
Drop that funky beat!