September Jokes

Funny September Jokes
Score: 550

September was the first calendar month no NFL players were arrested in six years. Kudos to their wives for being so well behaved last month.

Score: 106

Really hate having to wait till September to drive my new car. Shouldn't have bought an autumnobile.

Sorry.

Score: 85

How many seconds are there in one year? 12 of them: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd, May 2nd, June 2nd, July 2nd, August 2nd, September 2nd, October 2nd, November 2nd, December 2nd.

Score: 46

What did the detective in the Arctic say to the suspect? "Where were you on the night of September to March?"

Score: 38

I want to get married on September 11th... That way I'll never forget my anniversary

Score: 35

National Pride Day should be September 21 September 22 is the first day of Autumn, and as everyone knows, Pride goes before a Fall.

Score: 24

Tomorrow we have to wake Green Day up. When September ends.

Score: 17

What Does it Mean If You Were Born In September? That your parents started the new year with a BANG!

Score: 16

Offensive joke I thought of in class Me and my friend were talking about the last time he has to work at his job.

"Yeah my last day of work is September 11"

I reply " Yeah that was a lot of other people's last day of work too"

Score: 14

If you're born in September... ...that means your parents started out the New Year with a bang

Score: 10

What does the Chicago Cubs's name stand for? Completely Useless By September

Score: 9

September is alzheimers awareness month Did anyone else forget?

Score: 9

Not sure what you have heard, but it actually only rains twice a year in Seattle. October through May, then June through September.

Score: 9

September 15th is national camouflage day. I hope I don't see anyone celebrating.

Score: 9

If you're born in September, its pretty safe to assume . . . . your parents started out the New Year with a Bang!

Score: 8

If you were born at the end of September, then your parents started New Year with a bang. Escalate it.

Score: 7

If you were born in September... Then, you can be sure that your parents started the New Year, with a bang.

Score: 5

Were you born on September? If so, it's pretty obvious your parents started their New Year with a bang ;)

Score: 4

The people who are born in September are really awesome Their parents started their new year with a BANG!

Score: 4

I'm a narcoleptic Green Day fanatic, Wake me up when September ends.

Score: 4

September 20th My wife's surprise birthday party.

You coming?

Score: 4

If you were born on the September 16th, you were more than likely conceived on Christmas Day. I was actually born on September 15th, so Christmas came early for my mum.

Score: 3

There's a place where January comes after February and December comes before September It's the dictionary

Score: 3

Did anyone call Green Day yesterday? Someone was supposed to wake them up before September ended...

Score: 3

Last September my wife asked me to put a load in the dishwasher. So long story short, happy fathers day to me.

Score: 3

Guys, please don't forget to wake up Green Day tonight. September is ending.

Score: 2

"Yo Mama" so Ugly When she walks down the street in September, people say "Wow, is it Halloween already?"

Score: 2

My buddy is getting married. The date is set for September, 9th. I told him to push it back two days so he'll never forget.

Score: 2

There was a computers and technology fair on the 10th of September... I arrived at the venue but they all looked at me confused. They told me the fair was 8 days ago. Ridiculous!

Score: 2

My six-year old just got pregnant! She’s a Labrador Beagle Mix, and she’ll be having a litter of puppies in September!

Score: 2

I carve all my pumpkins in September. I suffer with premature ejackolantern

Score: 2

Don't you dare joke about September 11th, 1965... ...people dyed, man.

Score: 1

September: I had one of the worst hurricane months on record and Hugh Hefner died. October: Hold my beer

Score: 1

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