I bought a chessboard cake from the bakers last week.
Took one bite, looked up, and said "it's stale mate".
He seemed surprised, said "no, mate".
So I handed him the cake and said "check mate".
r/Jokes is getting stale At least we still have /r/politics
I once bought a cake in the shape of a chess set
When I tasted it, it was terrible, so I took it back to the store and said "This is stale mate!!"
The shopkeeper said "Are you sure??"
I said "I'm sure, if you don't believe me, then check mate!!!
Indian Restaurant I went to an Indian restaurant. The waiter brought out a basket of stale flatbread before realizing his mistake and bringing a fresh one. I would have complained, but it was a naan-issue.
I need new jokes to write in people's birthday cards. The one I've been using for years is getting pretty stale:
"Happy Bird Day!" Then I draw a bird.
Thanks /r/jokes!
What's the difference between Taylor Swift and a stale Pepsi? The stale Pepsi won't write a song about me after I dump it.
An Australian ate a few old chess pieces. When asked how they were, he said "It was stale, mate."
Two Australians are fighting over the last loaf of bread at the supermarket
They're both holding on to the loaf when one of them says:
​
It's stale mate.
Did you hear about the stoner who had a stash that never went stale or moldy? He used to spend hours stoned just staring at it... I guess it's true what they say, a watched pot never spoils.
What do you call an old white man who thinks outside the box? A stale cracker
Hey did you hear about this new Netflix series? About a one-armed chef who creates food that tastes like it's already old and outdated. I think it's called "The Hand Made Stale"
have you heard the joke about the fresh bread? well it's pretty stale by now
Why shouldn't you eat a chess sandwich? It's stale, mate.
I was gonna write a pun about bread But I thought most of you would find it rather stale
Why didn't the pirate chessplayer enjoy his crackers? Because they were stale, matey!
Why couldn't the Australian general win the war on bread? Because it was stale, mate.
What are the best “I put the ___ in ___” jokes? I’ve been using “I put the hot in psychotic” for ages and it’s becoming stale so I need another one lmao
What do you call a stale subreddit? r/jokes
Breaking News: French police capture notorious baguette bandit! The suspect was arrested for mugging tourists in the streets of Paris with a stale baguette. He's being charged for assault with a breadly weapon.
Marriage is like a sale at a store... When everything gets stale, everything's 50% off
I bought a chessboard cake from the baker’s today.
I took one bite and said, “It’s stale, mate.”
He seemed surprised and said, “No, mate.”
I handed it to him and said, “Check mate.”
What is it called when a King and Queen have no children? A stale mating.
There’s a new social media app created by the bakers’ union called “breadit”. You can buy a loaf on it but only if it’s stale and has been posted by 6 bakers in the last week.
You know what the biggest problem with Australian Chess jokes is? They’re getting stale, mate.
I think someone threw one of the very stale complimentary breadsticks onto the stage... But then I adjusted my glasses and it was just Amy Schumer.
Sure it’s cool that swinger parties have an aptly themes musical selection Pity that it got a little stale after the fifth round of ‘Last night a DJ shaved my wife”
My relationship was getting kind of stale... so my friend recommended I spice things up in the bedroom. When I asked how he recommended I do this, he lent me his Camel Sutra book. He said it was for humping.
I was gonna tell a joke about bread.. But nevermind it was stale
As a slice of stale bread, I used to hate mold. But it's growing on me.