“Hey Dad, have you seen my sunglasses?”
“No son, have you seen my dad glasses?”
Removed the edit due to the negativity flooding my phone, you can find an explanation of it in my recents. Much love to the positivity tho :).
What kind of sunglasses does Ned Flanders wear? Oakley Dokelys
Shark Tank
*on Shark Tank*
Sharks: what's your idea?
Me: ridiculously wide sunglasses
Shark 1: I'm out
Shark 2: I'm out as well
Hammerhead shark: tell me more
A son asked his dad
"Can you pass me my sunglasses?"
"Sure." Replied the dad. "Then can you pass me my dadglasses?"
How to be cool:
A) Use the sunglasses emoji.
B)
What does the sun and cleavage have in common? You can look at both for a second, but if want to stare you need to wear sunglasses.
Dad, will you hand me my sunglasses? "As soon as you hand me my dadglasses, Son."
If only Steve Irwin wore sunglasses They might have protected him from harmful rays
So my son asked me where his sunglasses are.
I said
"I don't know, where are my dadglasses?"
"Hey dad, have you seen my sunglasses?" "No son, have you seen my dad glasses?"
My father always told me, he liked his women like he liked his sunglasses. Sitting on his face.
Hey Dad, have you seen my sunglasses? No, but have you seen my dad glasses?
"Hey Dad, have you seen my sunglasses?" "No, have you seen my Dadglasses?"
I don't know why women spend so much money on sunglasses... Wouldn't it be cheaper to just tint the kitchen windows!
Steps to being cool
A) Use the sunglasses face
B)
My new sunglasses are making me paranoid Everyone suddenly seems shady
How to be cool:
A) cool sunglasses emoji
B)
I bought my wife some mirrored sunglasses. I look great in them!
How to become cool.
A\) Cool sunglasses emoji
B\)
How to be cool:
A) use cool sunglasses emoji in everything
B)
Why can't pirates wear sunglasses?
Because they have no buccaneers!
Happy speak like a pirate day!
Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You look, you get a sense of it, and you look away. AND you can look longer with sunglasses!
“Hey Dad, have you seen my sunglasses?” “No son, have you seen my dad glasses?”
What does the sun drink out of? Sunglasses.
I like my sunglasses like I like my politicians, Polarized and able to be bought surprisingly cheap.
Why do the FBI always wear sunglasses? To protect their FB-eyes
I sweat less when I wear sunglasses ... Because I feel cooler
I think I've found the local drug dealer.
He's always standing around with these big sunglasses on.
I just feel sorry that his dog always has to witness that life too.
How to become cool
A) Put on sunglasses
B)
I like my women like my sunglasses. Sitting on my face.
What do you call a skinny man in sunglasses? Slim Shady.
I decided to watch the eclipse with only sunglasses, in spite of all the warnings. I honestly can't see what all the fuss was about.
If blind people wear sunglasses... Why don't deaf people wear ear muffs?
When I took off my sunglasses, my roommate said, "I thought you had blue eyes." I replied, "Must have left them in my other genes"
The smoothest man on Earth bought a meal in a breakfast joint and asked his beautiful waitress "May I please have the Sussex Cakes ..."
(*lowers sunglasses*)
" ... without the *sus*?"
My son asked me to hand him his sunglasses. I said 'You never told me you had a son named glasses!'
The only problem I have with transition lenses is... I can't wear my sunglasses at night.
What do you call a penguin with sunglasses on? Shady
Did you hear about the sunglasses theif? He was pretty shady.