I've been talking to a 13 year old girl for about 2 weeks now We've been texting a lot lately and she just told me she's an undercover cop, that's quite impressive for her age.
On my way home from work saw a man texting while driving.. Knowing how dangerous this can be I pulled up next to him, rolled down my window and threw my beer at him.
I've been texting this cute dyslexic girl. I think she likes me, but she keeps sending mixed messages.
Drive safe
I saw a driver texting and driving.
It made me so mad I threw my beer at him.
Yesterday I saw a girl driving next to me while texting on her phone... I was so disgusted by her irresponsible driving that I rolled down my window and threw my beer at her.
So I was driving home from work tonight, I saw a woman texting whilst driving. It infuriated me so much I threw my beer bottle at her car.
Slow typing...
After 25 years... I was chatting with my classmate -my childhood crush online. She asked me why am I typing so slow. I said because my other hand isn't free.
She's not replying anymore.
Lesson learnt
-Never smoke while texting..
Some idiot was texting and driving and rear ended my car. It spilled my beer all over the place.
I almost got into an accident with someone who was texting and driving... luckily I braked just in time or else I would've spilt my beer.
how does a roman laugh when he's texting? lol 490
I was texting on my phone and accidentally rear ended someone this morning... We Pulled into a residential area, the guy got out of his car and lo' and behold, he's a dwarf. He said, "I am NOT happy!!!" I said, "Well then which one are you?"
Texting messages on the cell phone at 12 midnight ...
- How are you baby?
- I am in bed and thinking about you … And you my dear?
- I am at a club … And sitting right behind you!!
I hate driving drunk Texting becomes so much harder
I've had it with people texting and driving. if i see one more person on their phone while driving im going to roll my window down and throw my beer at them.
A lady cut me off... The other day a lady cut me off who was texting while driving. I got so mad at her I pulled up beside her and threw my beer can at her.
Two exes are texting..
Male Ex: Just ate a fish taco; it reminded me of you.
Female Ex: What a coincidence, because I ordered a pizza and it came in 20 seconds. It reminded me of you.
Texting while driving is incredibly stupid and dangerous You're practically begging for typos.
I hate autocorrect when I'm texting/typing. It should really keep it's opinion to its shelf.
As we waited for a bus in the frosty weather, the woman next to me mentioned that she makes a lot of mistakes when texting in the cold... I nodded knowingly. “It’s the early signs of typothermia.”
I get so mad every time I see someone texting and driving One of these days I'm going to throw my beer at their car!
I tried texting with gloves and it just wouldn't work... So I went back to texting with a phone.
I have been texting this girl and she just dropped the news that shes a vegetarian. Bummer. I didn't even get to meat her.
Just remember, son When you text a girl, you are also texting at least 5 of her friends.
So I met this girl on Tinder We get to texting and seems that both me and her are making many spelling errors. I guess you could say she’s exactly my type.
I was driving down the highway today and saw a woman in the lane next to me reading a novel while driving I was so angry that I stopped texting and flipped her off
I hate it when I'm texting, I get rudely interrupted by a cyclist bouncing off my windscreen.
Text to gf
I was texting my gf today and said "I don't expect to see you much tonight."
She replied, "I do."
To which I said, "Well that's cause there are mirrors everywhere these days."
Took her a second.
I need to stop texting while driving It's really hurting my golf game.
How do you get a woman to stop texting you? Reply to her message within a minute
My brother dropped this on me the other day.
Me (Texting): "I stopped by your apartment. Where are you?"
Bro : "My friend called me to watch Sharktank at his place. And for that reason, I'm out."
They banned texting while driving in my state... ...Now I read books and practice juggling.
Texting while driving kills
Once there was a line written on hoarding, 'Texting while driving kills.' That's okay but there was something written at the bottom too
'For more driving tips text 'SAFETY' to 19800.'
Really WTF
What is a pickup line you would use on someone who loves texting? Talk qwerty to me
A robot steals your job. It hurts, but that's how the economy works. Nothing personal. The robot starts texting your wife...