A bad workman blames his fools...
**EDIT: tools**
...stupid keyboard...
How is Rihanna's boyfriend and power tools the same? They're both Black and Decker.
A good workman doesn't blame his fools
\*tools.
Stupid keyboard.
Asked Google how to start a campfire without any tools It gave me 20 million matches.
Why does no one like the swiss army? Because they are all a bunch of tools.
Why wasn't the hammer allowed to join the party of seven other tools? Cause he was tool eight.
I was walking through Home Depot yesterday
when I tripped and knocked an industrial vacuum cleaner onto a bunch of carpentry tools.
It sucked on so many levels...
Turns out there are TWO Loch Ness Monsters. One of them is quite mean, but the other actually gives away his forestry tools. A little weird, sure, but it's always nice to see some random axe of Kind Ness.
What brand of power tools does Chris Brown use? Black and Deck Her
I stole some tools from my last kitchen job... It was a whisk I was willing to take.
I won’t go anywhere near foot hygiene tools... I hear some of them are pedi files
What happened when the carpenter knocked his tools off a pier? He saw the seas seize his saw.
Why do Christian bands only record with Pro Tools? Because they don't understand how to use Logic or Reason.
How many woodworking tools does Snoop Dogg usually use? Four chisels, my nizzle
Imagine that you're stuck in a locked room with no windows, no key, no tools, not even a door. How do you get out? Stop imagining it.
Tools of communication For effective communication it is important to have the right tools of communication. Personally, I love my sledge hammer. It shortens annoying conversations immensely.
I can tolerate many drawing tools... But straightedges are where I draw the line.
A mechanic falls onto his tools... It was a gut-wrenching experience.
(My grandpa who passed away last year, famous joke) Why should you always keep your tools out of the rain? Because nobody likes a rusty hoe
I'm surprised Bob the Builder ever gets anything done He's surrounded by tools
I really wanted to make an obscure joke about tools, but awl I could come up with was this one. Nailed it.
I suspected my friend of using my carpentry tools without my permission... And when he bragged he made a new front door decoration, I knew it was a sign.
Only a bad chef blames his tools, Jeremy.. Yeah, but trying to fillet a fish with a spoon just doesn't quite cut it.
You know, Apple really have given us some of the greatest tools of our generation They're called Apple fanboys.
What do lesbians and mechanics have in common? Snap-on tools
I have a good joke about stone tools but Its a bit of an Oldowan
I like my women like I like my tools Locked in my shed
What do you have when you don't focus on your tools? No attention spanner.
How many sculpting tools does Snoop Dogg usually use? Four chisel, my nizzle...
Did you hear about the surgeon who accidentally swapped his tools with the hospital handyman’s? His last surgery was gut wrenching.
A Lil Yachty concert is like a hardware store. All you see are a bunch of tools.
Traditionally, orthopedic surgeons were strong and dumb. But now they have power tools.
Where does Kim Jong Un shop for tools? Home Despot.
Jin Wong works in construction
He had some of his tools and levels stolen so now he puts his name on his stuff..
Now everywhere I look its just Wong on so many levels..
Kids were playing with my garden tools again...
... so I've locked them in the garage.
They've been banging on the door all day.
Lice Technicians who work with substandard tools... Do their poor working conditions leave them scratching their heads?
After I do housework I neatly put all the tools away... ... so I don't accidently kick the bucket.
I went to a home improvement store and I pass through the "Tools and Hardware Aisle," all of a sudden I hear an array of beeping noises that stop when I continue on to the next aisle...
Turns out the beeping was from stud finders.
(Re-telling of an old joke)