One afternoon, A Viking called Rudolph was looking out his window when he suddenly said , “ It’s going to rain in seven minutes.” His wife asked, “How do you know?” His response:” Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”
I was digging in the back garden...
.. Whan I came across a horde of viking coins, I was so excited I almost ran in to tell my wife,
Until I remembered why I was digging.
A Viking is arguing with his wife
"It's definitely hail" says Gertha
"No, it's rain!" Says Rudolf
"No, it's round and hard, it's hail!" She retorts.
Getting very flustered now, Rudolf shouts "Look! Rudolf the Red knows rain, dear!"
One night a viking named Rudolf the Red was looking out his window when he said, "It's going to rain".
His wife asked, "How do you know".
"Because Rudolf the Red knows rain, dear".
Ninja Joke
Can a viking throw an axe?
Sure he can.
Can a cowboy throw a lasso?
Sure he can.
Can a ninja throw a spinning blade?
Shuriken.
One night a viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window and said to his wife: "Tomorrow it's going to rain."
His wife asked: "How do you know?"
Rudolph answered: "Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."
Did you hear the one about the Viking who was reincarnated? He was Bjorn again.
My girlfriend said if I don't stop my obsession with Viking culture she'll fight me to the death "Jokes on you" I said "if I die in battle I'll go straight to Valhalla"
What do you call a group of penniless Viking grave diggers? The poor norsemen of the necropolis
An old Viking teaching young ones Once we land and enter a vilage, look for a church. If there is a church there is nothing left to pillage in the village, so just go directly to the church.
What's the difference between a painkiller addict and an Anglo Saxon? One overtakes Vicodin and the other overtakes a Viking den
It might take a village to raise a child... but it only takes a viking to raze a village.
What language did the Viking secret service use to communicate in secret? Norse code.
How do you communicate with the spirit of a Viking warrior? With a Nor-Ouija board.
[OC] My friends and I are starting a disco group. We'll dress as a Viking, a Mongol, a Caribbean pirate, a Bedouin raider, and a Spanish conquistador. We call ourselves... The Pillage People.
A famous Viking explorer returned home from a voyage and found his name missing from the town register. His wife insisted on complaining to the local civic official, who apologized profusely, saying….. "I must have taken Leif off my census."
What do you call a vegetarian Viking A nor-vegan!
What’s a Viking’s favourite social media? Raid-it
What is a Viking's favorite music? Ragnarock
Did you hear about the Buddhist Viking? He believed he'd be Bjorn again
What did the Viking say when hanging out his laundry? "Today is a good day to dry."
How do viking ships communicate with each other?
Norse code
I'm gonna keep making these jokes until one blows up
I've decided to join Anytime Fitness Because I like to dress up as a 12th century Viking Warrior when I work out.
What do you call a viking who's been bit by a vampire? Norseferatu
What did the Viking boss say to his band of misbehaving marauders? It's either my way or Norway!
It takes a village to raise a child It takes a Viking to raze a village
How did Viking ships communicate? Norse code.
A Viking explorer came home to find that his name was missing from the town register. His family complained to the town officials, one of whom said, "I'm so sorry! I must have taken Leif off my census."
Where does a muslim viking go after death Valhalal
Norwegian archeologists have uncovered the very first Viking parenting book. The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*.
Did you hear about the viking cannibal? He had a Swede-tooth
What did the eagle say to the viking after the hunting trip? “Sorry, but this time there’s no trophy for your trophy case, Keenum!”
One night a Viking
One night a Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, "Its going to rain"
His wife asked, "How do you know?"
"Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear"
What did Dead Viking say to Voluptuous Valkyrie? Valhallo there.
What do you call a dead Viking? A Viked.
What do you call a viking cemetary? A grey fjord.
What do you call a Viking who is really good at basketball? a Vallhalla Balla