The internet is so full of people making up fake stories for fake internet points that no one is giving any credit to the real heroes anymore... Like me, who just yesterday beat up a volcano
What did one volcano say to the other volcano? I lava you
The Calbuco volcano is very hot right now... But everything around it is Chile.
My girl says I'm like a volcano in bed... Dormant
What did the Italian volcano say to his girlfriend? I lava you!
What kind of dessert comes out of a musical volcano? Bach Lava
Congratulations everyone!
Researchers have proven that we can jump in a pool of volcano.
but only once.
What is it a volcano has which gives him trouble erupting? Eruptile dysfunction.
What do you get when you cross a Classical German composer with an erupting volcano?
Baklava.
(It came to me in a dream last night. I dunno man..)
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs inside a volcano?
Anakin Skywalker.
(Happy Geek Pride Day!)
"How much longer are we going to have endure this erupting volcano full of hot air and gas" asked the Hawaiian "I don't know, but turn off Twitter for a short term solution"
What does baby volcano say to his volcano mom? Magma.
Why was the volcano so pleasant to be around? Because he was so magmanimous.
What kind of code does a volcano use to make its website? HTMelt
Did you hear about the bird that lost all of its feathers in a volcano? It was moltin'.
An explosive knock knock joke
My 11yr old son came up with this joke
Knock knock
Who's there?
Interrupting mountain
Interrup-
VOLCANO!!!
How do you make baklava? Take a chicken and drop it in a volcano.
What did the affectionate volcano tell the Hawaiian homeowner? "I lava you."
What is a volcano's favorite spice? Ground cumin
Two scientists are studying a volcano. One says 'yep, she's gonna blow'. The other says 'nevermind her, what about the volcano?'
What does Sean Connery's nemesis and the crater of a volcano have in common? They're both ash-holes.
What do you call a mean person who fell in a pit created by a volcano? Ashhole.
Wouldn't you check the volcano everyday? Pompei says "No"
What did the Italian volcano say to his wife? I lava you!
What comes out of a reasonable volcano? Pragma.
There's a cool sport called Volcano Diving..... You'll only do it once.
My girlfriend said she wanted to experiment more in the bedroom... I don't know why she got so mad when I put my baking soda and vinegar volcano next to the nightstand.
A few punny jokes I came up with recently
How do we call a quiet bus? A shuttle.
How do we call a pillow that sings? Alcapillow
Why did the volcano go to the gynecologist? To get checked for lava lamps.
What do you get when you throw a chicken in a volcano? Baklava
I had a really hot dream last night... I was in the middle of the desert, high noon, next to an erupting volcano, wearing a parka.
What do you call a volcano on drugs? A Cocaino