Egg Jokes

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Funniest Egg Jokes

I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon today I'll let you know.

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Funny Egg Jokes
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I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I'll let you know.

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What did the egg say to the boiling water? It's gonna take me a little while to get hard, I just got laid by this chick.

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Told by a 7 year old boy: How do you drop on an egg on a concrete floor without cracking it. Concrete floors are really hard to crack.

Then he said "you were thinking about the egg weren't you!"

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A piece of toast and a hard boiled egg walked into a bar..... The bartender says " Sorry, we don't serve breakfast here".

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I just ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I'll let you know

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Give a man an egg and he’ll eat for a day Breed a man that can lay an egg and suddenly you’re “taking science too far.”

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I've just ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon....... I will keep you posted.

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What did the egg say to the pot of boiling water? It might take me a minute to get hard, I just got laid this morning.

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Went out last night dressed as a chicken and got with a girl dressed as an egg A life long question was answered. It was the chicken

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I went to a costume party dressed as an egg and I met a girl dressed as a chicken. I said to her "So are we going to find out, or what?"

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Why do the French make omelettes with only one egg? Because in France one egg is un oeuf.

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The egg said to the pot of boiling water.... It's gonna take a while to get hard, I just got laid this morning

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What did the egg say to the boiling water? "Sorry, it's going to take me a while to get hard, I got laid last night."

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What did the egg say to the boiling water? It might take me a while to get hard, i just got laid by a chick.

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What is the difference between an egg and a redditor? Eggs get laid at least once.

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What did the egg say to the boiling water? It may take me a minute to get hard, I just got laid by this chick.

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Chicken and an egg A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken lights up a cigarette. The egg, with a dissatisfied look on it's face, rolls over and remarks, "Well, I guess we answered that question."

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How can you drop an egg six feet without breaking it? By dropping it seven feet - it won't break for the first six.

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Why do the French only have one egg for breakfast? Because one egg is un oeuf.

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I'm ordering a chicken and an egg from Amazon I'll let you know

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What did the egg say to the boiling water? It may take me a while to get hard, I got laid last night.

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What did the egg say to the boiling water? It’s gonna take me a while to get hard, I just got laid by this chick

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I just ordered a chicken and an egg off Amazon.... I want to see which one comes first.

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How can you a drop a egg on concrete without cracking it? Anyway you want. Concrete doesn't break easily.

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Why do the French make their omelettes with only one egg instead of two or three? Because in France, one egg is un oeuf.

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Just ordered a chicken and egg from Amazon I’ll let you know

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What did the egg say to the boiling water? "Not sure I can get hard..just got laid 10 minutes ago"

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What did the Easter egg say to the boiling water? It’s going to take a while to get me hard. I just got layed by some chick.

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I have just ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I'll let you know.

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I ordered a chicken and an egg on Amazon. I’ll let you know.

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Why do you only need one egg in France? Because one egg is un oeuf.

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What did they egg say to the boiling water? It might take me a while to get hard. I just got laid.

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I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon Fresh. I’ll let you know.

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Why don’t French people order 2 eggs in a restaurant? Because one egg is un oeuf.

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I went to a party dressed as an egg and I hooked up with a guy dressed as a chicken.
I guess we have an answer to that age old question.
It was the chicken.

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I have high cholesterol, so my doctor has me on the "period" diet One egg a month

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What did the egg say to the boiling water? You expect me to get hard so fast, I just got laid!

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I came up with this when I was three years old. What do you call an egg that's scared?

A chicken egg.

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What did the egg say to the pot of boiling water? Its going to take me a while to get hard because I was just laid.

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New Egg Jokes

What does an egg say when its late? "Sorry, omlet!"

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Why did the Frenchman put only one egg in his omelet? Because one egg is *un oeuf*

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Waiter, Waiter, this egg is bad dont blame me sir, I only laid the table.

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Why did the egg get laid? Because it chickened out.

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I was going to make an egg joke, but..... I couldn’t scramble one up.

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A man was walking out of the store after shopping. Suddenly his foot got stuck to a rock, he fell, but didn't any egg break He hadn't got any eggs

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A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken takes out a cigarette and begins to smoke. The egg, pissed off, takes one look at the chicken, rolls over and pulls the blanket over him and says, "I guess we answered that question!"

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg Well since there is an egg, the rooster did

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What did the egg say after smoking a joint? Omlit

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How about a blond joke. My cousin blond* was once asked at a restaurant if she wants her egg poached. She promptly replied "isnt that illegal." True story too.

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What do you call an egg that sings? Karayolke

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What did the egg say to the boiling water? It's going to take me a while to get hard, I just got laid by a chick.

(Reposted to fix typo)

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A chicken and an egg are laying in bed together The chicken rolls over and lights a cigarette. "Well," says the egg, "I guess that answers that question".

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What did the egg say to the frying pan? I’m sorry I can’t get hard... I just got laid.

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What do you do when you hear about an egg getting captured? You may need to find their eggxact location and plan an eggscape, the journey would be very eggsplosive in eggcitement.

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Have you ever had a French omelette? They think one egg is “un oeuf”

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Today, I ordered an egg and a chicken off of Amazon I'll let y'all know which one comes first

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Why do the French only ever eat one egg? Because one egg is un oeuf.

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Which came first the chicken or the egg I don’t care I’m starving

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what came first the ckicken or the egg the dinosaur

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What do you call a rooster who's abusive to his kids? An egg beater

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"Mom, I think my egg isn't well." "Shut up and keep eating!" "Mom, do I have to eat the beak too?"

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If you had a Fried Egg for breakfast yesterday, what should you have today? A Sattered Egg.

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I bet a lot of people are going to be born Jan 12th. Since everyone is egg hunting right now

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What did the egg say to the boiling water? Alright, but it’s gonna take me a while to get hard I just got laid!

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Do to covid-19 the format of this year's Easter egg hunt has changed. Instead of trying to find eggs in a garden, everyone will be trying to find eggs in a grocery store.

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(OC?) What do you get when you beat egg whites to stiff peaks? A standing ovation.

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I love egg and chicken jokes! ... Or are they chicken and egg jokes??

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What’s the difference between an egg and a beetroot ? You can beat an egg but you can’t beat a root.

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Why do french people only eat one egg at breakfast? Because one egg is un oeuf

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What's the difference between an incel and an egg? An egg gets laid.

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What do you call an abusive chicken? An egg beater

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"I'm starting a new job" What sort of job?

"I'm an expert egg beater"

That's a whisky business

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What do you call an egg with a genetic mutation? New Yoke State

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I ordered a chicken and an egg from amazon yesterday I’ll let you know

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Two sperm are racing to fertilize the egg One says, “this is taking forever are we close?”

The other says, “I don’t think so, we just passed the esophagus.”

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How come a hen in my village lays only 1 egg per week and in cities they give an egg every day? Because the latter one is characterless.

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What did the egg say to the toaster? You get hot, I’ll get hard and we’ll get this over with in about 2 minutes.

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Why do the French have small breakfasts ? Because one egg is un oeuf.

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I just ordered a chicken and an egg online I'll let you know

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So the chicken and the egg are lying in bed together. The chicken leans back and lights a cigarette and says “well, that answers that question.”

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Why do the French eat small breakfasts? Because one egg is un oeuf.

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A lot of people think an egg is a chicken fetus But actually, that’s a common missed conception

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Why can't a Frenchman eat more than one egg? One egg is un oeuf.

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Did you hear about the egg that moonlighted as a comedian? It was full of yolks.

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What’s the difference between a child and an omelette? Only one is made with a fertilized egg

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I'll let you know! I ordered a chicken and an egg on Amazon, I'll let you know.

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What car does an egg drive? A Yolkswagen

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How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it? A: Any way you want, concrete floors are very hard to crack.

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I once temporarily forgot how to open an egg Then I cracked it.

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A man and his wife enter a cafe The man says "Morning, what've you got?"

Well, there's egg and bacon, egg, sausage and bacon, and the mods have removed this sketch for breaking rule 3.

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My chocolate egg had special inner foil, and a grand prize inside: on-set passes to the filming of Multiverse of Madness! Thanks for the Strange, gold Kinder!

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What did the meditating egg say? Ohmmmmmmmmmlet

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I ordered a chicken and an egg on Amazon. I’ll let you know when either arrive.

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Only after I started eating out my girlfriend did I realize she was on her period. Egg on my face, right?

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How does an egg tell a joke? It doesn't..it tells a yolk that makes you crack up

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What does a French man say when he drops an egg on the ground? Oeuf

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The chicken and the egg are lying in bed... The chicken is smoking a cigarette and smiling contentedly to himself, but the egg looks upset."Well," she mutters under her breath, "I guess that answers THAT question."

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Why did the egg cross the road? Because it felt an inclination.

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One egg says to another "Don't speak to the middle one - he's a d*ck"

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What does an egg need? A need for heat

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