Eye Doctor Jokes

You’ll never believe who I bumped into on my way to the eye doctor! Everybody.

A Polish man goes to the eye doctor... A Polish man goes to the eye doctor. The bottom line of the eye chart has the letters:

C Z Y N Q S T A S Z

The Optometrist asks „Can you read this?”

„Read it?”, the Pole replies, „I know the guy!”

My whole life before age 12 was a blur. That's when I went to the eye doctor. Things cleared up after that.

I just came back from the eye doctor, he says I have kindergarden disease. I asked her what that meant, she said that means I have really small pupils.

A Polish man was at the Eye Doctor to test his sight, and looked at a chart with the following letters: G U O Y L V B J I T D A Z C K

Doctor: Can you read the letters?

Polish Man: Of course i can read it, I know the guy!

A Polish guy goes to the eye doctor The doctor holds up a chart: K Z S Y X W K P G and asks the man if he can read it. "Read it?" he says, "I *know* the guy!"

Asian man goes to the eye doctor. Doctor says"You have a cateract." Asian man says "No, I have a rincoln continental."

My eye doctor told me he could fix my vision with witchcraft. At least he's opti-mystic.

A Russian goes to the eye doctor The doctor points to a chart on the wall:

N P U K H N R A X B T

The doctor asks “Can you read those letters one by one for me please?”

The Russian replies “_Read_ them? I even know the guy.”

A chinese man goes to the eye doctor... The doctor says "You have cataract. " and the chinese guy says "No, I have a rinkin continental."

Why cant an eye doctor count to 3? They never make it past 1, or 2. 1, or 2?

Guess who I bumped into on the way to the eye doctor? Everyone.

Asian guy goes to a eye doctor After the checkup the doctor says "The problem is you have a cataract" then the Asian guy responds with"No I have a tesra"

How many eye doctors does it take to change a lightbulb? One, or two? One, or two?

A Chinese Man goes to the eye doctor A Chinese guy goes to an eye doctor and the doctor says,
"I know why you've been having trouble. you have a cataract." and the Chinese guy says, "No I drive a rincon continental,"

An Asian man goes to the eye doctor The eye doctor says, "Sir, you have a cataract".

And the Asian man says, "No, I have a Rincoln Contirental".

What do you call an eye doctor living on an Alaskan island An optical Aleutian

A Chinaman goes to see an eye doctor. After the exam, the doctor says, 'I know why you're having trouble.' The China man says, 'Why?' The doctor says, 'You have a Cataract'. The China man says 'No, I have a Rincoln Continental.

A Chinese man goes to the eye doctor complaining of poor eyesight in his left eye. The doctor says “I see you have a cataract”. The Chinese man says, "No I don't...I have a rincoln continental."

Former eye doctor Rand Paul decided to run for president in 2016 Of all people, you would have thought he'd have 2020 vision

Don’t let your eye doctor give you cocaine The first line will be big. But then they just get smaller and smaller.

Why did the gangster have to keep seeing the eye doctor? Because he had glock-oma.

A Chinese guy goes to the eye doctor. After the exam the doctor said, "I know why you're having trouble."

The Chinese guy asks, "Why?"

Doctor said, "You have a cataract."

Chinese guy says, "No, I have a Rincoln Continental."

A Chinaman goes to the eye doctor.... Eye doctor says "You've got a cataract."

Chinaman says "No, I drive Rincoln Continental."

A Chinaman goes to the eye doctor.. After the exam the doctor said, "I know why you're having trouble." The Chinaman says, "Why?" Doctor said, "You have a cataract." Chinaman says, "No, I have a Rincoln Continental."

Did you hear about the Eye Doctor who changed professions to become a comedian? He made a spectacle of himself.

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ok its bad. Apologies in advance.

The Asian man got bad news from his eye doctor The doctor told him he had a cataract.
The Asian man replied, "No I dwive a Wincoln!"

A Chinaman goes to see the eye doctor... After the exam the doctor said, "I know why you're having trouble." The Chinaman says, "why?" Doctor said, "you have a cataract." Chinaman says, "no, I have a Rincoln Continental."

How many eye doctors does it take to change a lightbulb? One... or Two....

It is nearly impossible to find an eye doctor on an Alaskan island. They are all optical Aleutians.

Went to my eye doctor the other day... Guess who I bumped into? Everyone!

I went to the eye doctor today and they said I could see the future They told me I have 2020 vision

A Chinese man goes to see an eye doctor (Racist) After the examination, the doctor says "You have a cataract."


The Chinese guy replies, "No, I have a Rincoln Continentar."



Courtesy of Junior in the Sopranos

An asian man goes to the eye doctor... Doctor: "Sir you have cataracts."
Asian man: "No I drive a honda."

A man walks into an eye doctor and asks to see the doctor... The nurse replies, "Not with that eye!"

An asian man goes to the eye doctor... The doctor says to him "I know why you're not seeing so well, you have a cataract"

The asian man says "No, I have a Rincoln Contirental"

I visited my eye doctor the other day for an eye test. Found out I was color blind, it was completely out of the purple. Devastated.

What do you call an eye doctor living in Alaska? An optical Aleutian.

I want to make a joke about my eye doctor. But it sounded very cornea.