Hilarious My Name Is Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest My Name Is Jokes

Hi. My name is Bill Gates and today, I will be teaching you how to count to ten: 1, 2, 3, 95, 98, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10

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Edit: I think I may be missing a version, but looking through the comments it seems no one else knows what it is either. I'll have to google it.

Score: 1902

Score: 851

I am broken when my name is spoken. What am I? McDonald’s ice cream machine

Score: 728

I just made my new wrestling name. My name is Off In Church... Because no one beats off in church

Score: 223

Hi. My name is Bill Gates and today, I will be teaching you how to count to ten: 1, 2, 3, 95, 98, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10

Score: 130

My name is Jafar My name is Jafar

I come from afar

There is Note 7 in my car

Allahu Akbar

Score: 54

My name is Boninjab It's pronounced Bob.
The ninja is silent.

Score: 46

Just to let you know, My name is Three And before you say anything, I know, it's odd

Score: 45

When you getting it on but she says the wrong name My name isn't Help

Score: 43

Hey my name is Nathan and i'm 12 years old:) I was wondering if there was a dating site for only 12 year olds and under... I'm not asking for myself!! My uncle was wondering

Score: 37

My name is Ezra. Spelling my name is easy... r, a

Score: 35

My name is Zane, and my girl told me goodbye today.. All I did was ask her to feed the cat She said, "I'll feed her, Zane."

Score: 21

"You just need to relax Steve, it's just a minor surgery, it happens everyday with no issues" the surgeon said The patient replies "But my name isn't Steve"

Nervously, the surgeon replies "But my name is"

Score: 21

TIL my mother named me after her favourite hobby My name is Heroin

Score: 15

I told my son I was named after Socrates, but he didn't believe me because my name is Jim... Well, I wasn't named before Socrates!

Score: 14

A cowboy walks into a bar. He throws a coin up in the air, shoots at it three times, and says "My name is Bill, Buffalo Bill". After the cowboy, a stranger stands up, pulls down his pants, showing three testicles and says "My name is Bill, Cherno Bill".

Score: 14

Hi, my name is Cage and if I had a Nickel for every time i told a funny joke... I would be Nickeless Cage.

Score: 13

A man walks down the street with a large pole on his shoulder A person across the street asks:
"Are you a pole vaulter"
(With a strong German accent): "No, I'm a German but how did you know my name is Walter?"

Score: 13

Hello my name is lettuce, and I was going to the grocery store... Ah, I’m getting ahead of myself

Score: 11

"Hi, My name is John Foreman and I run a cabinet making business." John said counter-productively.

Score: 10

Helo, my name is Ma-ma-ma-ma-martin. "You stutter?"
"No, my father did and the registrar was an idiot."

Score: 10

I am broken when my name is spoken. The McDonald’s ice cream machine.

Score: 10

My name is 'Piff The Magic Dragon'. You may have heard of my brother. Steve.

Score: 9

Wow Peter! You have changed a lot during the last years! "Wow Peter! You have changed a lot during the last years!"
"My name is not Peter..."
"Oh you've also changed your name?!"

Score: 9

Jack, do you think I’m a bad mother? Mom, my name is Erik.

Score: 8

Mom: Gary, am I a bad parent? Son: My name is Dave...

Score: 6

Hi, my name is Gregory. Greg for short, Grego for medium.

Score: 5

Are you feeling okay? (My attempt at a joke)

Person 1: You feeling okay?

Person 2: If I touch you and your name is okay will I be feeling okay?

Person 1: But my name isn't okay...

Person 2: Oh I'm sorry

Score: 5

My name is Joseph King. Nah, just JoeKing.

Score: 4

My name is fatatata But I am not fatatall

Score: 4

I'm sick of telling my parents that my name is Richard. It's Richard with "ch", not a "t"

Score: 4

My name is Afterhim because my father was a big fan of Rocky Balboa So he decided to name me after him

Score: 4

My name is Vincent But you can call me Vin, you'll save a cent.

Score: 4

A Sikh walks into a bar.. and takes a seat.
Bartender: Are you relaxing?
Sikh: No, my name is Aman Singh.

Score: 4

"Stephen, am I a bad mother?" "My name is Chris.."

Score: 4

Mother and son conversation... Mom: "Peter. Am I a bad mother?"

Son: "My name is Paul"

Score: 4

A mother and her child are having a conversation... "Anton, do you think I'm a bad mother?" The mom asks.

"My name is Paul." Says the child.

Score: 4

My uncle once started a race with my dad to see who could have a son called James first. Since my name is James, That means my parents came first.

Score: 3

People always talk about doing whatever it takes to get where they want to get. Hello ladies, my name is Whatever It Takes.

Score: 3

Father: Tom, am I a bad father? Son: Umm, my name is Paul.

Score: 3

New My Name Is Jokes

A short fragment of a telephone conversation with psychic "Hello? Have I reached Marty the Psychic?"

"Yes"

"Hello Marty, my name is David"

"I know"

Score: 0

I consider myself lucky, I celebrate Valentine's Day every year My name is Valentine

Score: 0

I've decided to become mature and enter the dating scene. My first move is an introduction. 'Hi my name is Eric' Eric-tiledisfunction

Score: 2

A surgeon was getting ready to operate on a patient. "David," he said, "don't worry. Remain calm. This is just a minor surgery." The patient replied, "my name is not David." "I know," the surgeon said. "My name is David."

Score: 2

My friend was arrested at the airport for saying hi to me... My name is jack.

Score: 2

I hate label people That's why I didn't pass the job interview at the "Hello my name is" sticker factory.

Score: 1

This morning i said to myself "pete, from now on, no more alcohol" Luckily, my name isn't pete!

Score: 1

My Name is Eric Co\-Worker was giving nick names at work using puns.

Eric: Whats my nick name?

Co\-Worker: You don't get one. Youre 'generic'. \(walks away\)

Score: 2

American: Hi, my name is Guy Manson Canadian : Sorry, we like to say Person Personperson

Score: 2

A mother once asked her son "John, am i a good mother" He replied "mom ,my name is Brandon".

Score: 2

Heard this from a waiter at dinner tonight. Hey baby, my name is Olaf...like the snowman. Mind if I melt inside you?

Five star restaurant I am laughing out loud right now hahaj

Score: 1

Dumb Joke I Made When I Was 11 An egg came up to you and said: "Hi my name is Mr. Whites but you could just call me Egg". Then you said: "Hi Egg nice to beat you!". Then Egg started cracking up because the yolk was so funny.

Then he cooked meth.

Score: 1

I was walking through the Olympic Park when I saw a man with a really long stick, I asked him "Are you a pole vaulter?" He said "Yes, but how do you know my name is Walter?"

Score: 2

I just came back from the doctors and he had a magic scale that guesses your name But it got it wrong my name isn't "Max"

Score: 3

I met this girl in a bar last night She was very open and flirtatious. She says "hi my names Carmen, I like cars and I like men"

So I said "nice to meet you Carmen, my name is Charlie Beercunt"

Score: 3

"Jake, do you think I'm a bad mother?" "My name is Paul."

Score: 2

My name is Christian... ... and I'm Jewish.

My name is a joke.

Score: 2

A guy walks into a bar... The guy sees a beautiful lady and walks to her.
Guy: Excuse me Miss? You dropped something.
Girl: What did I drop?
Guy: Your standards, hi my name is PandaGen

Score: 2

Bad Mother Anthony, do you think I'm a bad mother?

Son: My name is Casey

Score: 3

Hey, I heard you call yourself Jay-san, what a weeb "My name is Jason"

Score: 1

Bad Mom! -Anton, do you think I’m a bad mother?

-My name is Paul.

Score: 1

Hi my name is, Rick Harrison and this is my pawn shop.

Score: 2

2 kids were late for class... The first kid came in

"Why are you late?"

"I was on Mulberry Hill!"

The second kid came in

"Why are you late?"

"I was on Mulberry Hill!"

Then, a 3rd kid came in.

"Well, who are you, young lady?"

"Oh, I am new. My name is Mulberry."

Score: 2

My name is Steven But the bank calls me Owen. Owen Lotts.

Score: 2