Marine Jokes

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Funniest Marine Jokes

I think I'm failing my marine biology class My grade is below C level.

Funny Marine Jokes

What do you get if you cross a soldier and a scientist? A marine biologist.

TIL the excuse the US Marine used in May 1943 after accidentally friendly fire'ing a British U-boat. Woops, wrong sub.

What do you call a marine who can't swim? A submarine.

Recently divorced Marine sniper slapped with a 1500 yard restraining order. He is now struggling to understand the distance that has become between them, as well as windage.

Source: The Onion

Bill Clinton steps off of a helicopter on the Whitehouse lawn, carrying two pigs. A marine is there to greet him and says, "Nice pigs, sir!" Clinton replies, "Thank you! I got one for Hillary and one for Chelsea." The marine says, "Nice trade, sir!"

What's the difference between a dog and a marine biologist? One wags a tail and the other tags a whale.

Military Jokes I'm a former Army guy and I need some jokes about other branches of the military. So far all I have is:

In the Navy, how do you seperate the men from the boys?
-With a crowbar.

What's the worst thing in a woman?
-A Marine

[Bad joke] How does a Marine like his eggs? Semper-fried!

(Bring on the booings and the beatings)

A marine walks into a bar and tries to order a Bin Laden “What’s that?”, the bartender asked

The marine replied, “two shots and a splash of water”.

Painfully bad joke my younger brother told me. What do you call an expert on marine life? An aFISHionado.

How can you tell if someone has been in the Marine Corps? Don't worry. They'll tell you.

Marine biologists have discovered a group of killer whales that regularly meets and plays music together. They call it an orca-stra.

What did the Italian marine biologist say when asked to identify an eel? That's a moray!

​

I'll see myself out...

Currently the most offensive joke going through my head. What did the female Marine get moments after she was gang raped by her fellow Marines?

A Dishonourable Discharge.

What happened to the Marine that took a laxative? He was relieved of doodie.

If a fish died in the ocean... ...does it become a marine corpse?

What did the Marine Biologist say when he saw two eels making love? "It's a Moray."

What do you call a retired Marine in a Chevy sports car? A Corps vet in a Corvette.

A Marine turns to a CIA agent and asks, “Why are we in Panama again?” The agent shrugs and replies, “Just ‘cause.”

Why did the marine park worker feel aimless? Because they lacked porpoises.

If you lock a US Marine in a room with an anvil .... ... He will either break it, lose it, or get it pregnant.

PETA has done an incredible job in preserving marine life They saved millions of fish from drowning

Opening a pet shop specialized only in Birds and marine animals Calling it fish & chips

A Space Marine walks into a bar. He says to the grizzled, portly barkeeper, "Bring me two beers." Seeing that he is alone, the barkeep asks him 'Why two?' The Space Marine chuckles and replies, "Simple, my friend. One for me, and one FOR THE EMPEROR!"

What do you call a Marine that likes to follow orders? A Sub-Marine!

*attempt at OC joke. I'm sure someone else has thought of this before me though.*

What do you call a marine who didn't complete his training? A submarine

What do you call a Marine that is bad at their job? a sub Marine

According to recent scientific studies it's possible that all marine life will be extinct by the year 2050. Which is going to make it really difficult to comfort someone who is going through a relationship break-up.

What's the difference between a Marine and submarine? Nothing. The Navy goes down on both of them.

What do you call a marine with an IQ of 160? A Brigade.

What did the whale say to the diver? "Ooooooooooooooooooooooo."

What did the whale say to the marine biologist?

"Ooooooooooooooooooooooo."

What did the whale say to my wife?

"Hey; you should lose weight."

Have you ever wondered what MARINE stood for? Muscles. Are. Required. Intelligence. Not. Essential.

My Marine Biologist friend was so excited about her job. She said she's found her life porpoise.

What did Holly Holm say to Ronda Rousey's date to the Marine Corps Ball? I hit that.

Marine biologists were baffled by why Jaws would always swim away after chomping off swimmers' legs. Turns out he's lack toes intolerant.

My dad wanted me to be a Marine Biologist... But, I'm too old to join the military.

What did the skeptical marine biologist say before her first day of work? I think I’m just gonna test the waters...

Why was the Marine dishonorably discharged? He was rotten to the Corps.

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New Marine Jokes

My doctor recommended marine air to me After I looked at my bank account, I hung a herring in front of my fan

What marine animal has the highest chance of getting cancer? The pufferfish

Why did the therapist tell the patient about the seashells in the underwater marine vehicle? So they would be aware of their sub conches.

What do you get when a marine dies? Marine Corps.

Just failed my Marine corp entry exam.... They told us to color a picture of the American flag and I'm the only one that didn't eat the crayons.

How many boxes can a Marine eat in a day? Semper Five

A Marine and a SEAL walk into a bar... The Marine gets a beer

The SEAL gets a book deal

What did the Italian marine biologist say? That's a Moray!

What does a confused Egyptian marine say? Who Ra?

Commander said to marine I haven't seen you on camouflage practice today. Marine said: Thank you sir!

Im failing Marine Biology but I think I should still pass. My grade is below C level.

A reporter once asked a Marine sniper... "What do you feel whenever you shoot an enemy?"

The Marine shrugged and replied "recoil".

How do marine creatures commit suicide? They krill themselves.

What did one marine biologist say to the other? A life without meaning is a life without porpoise

I was thinking of dating this girl I met. She’s an marine biologist who works on a submarine. But between you and me, I think she’s a little out of my league.

How is a dog and a marine biologist alike? One wags a tail and the other tags a whale.

I attached a picture of a marine mammal to my graphite stick. It's a penseal

What's the difference between a dog and a marine biologist? One wags it's tale, the other tags a whale.

Interviewer to Marine Corpsman: "What is your stance on guns?" Corpsman: "Usually behind them"

My friend is an expert in Finance and Marine Biology Which makes borrowing money from him a problem, since he's a real Loan Shark.

The best marine is a submarine.

A marine gets a sponsorship deal For Crayola

A young marine is talking to an old, salty vet. The marine complains there is never anywhere he can have "private time", he says with a nudge. The old vet laughs, and suggests he use a silencer rather than his hand. That way, they never hear you coming!

I'm an American, but I thought Marine Le Pen got less than fifty percent of the vote. Why did she not win?

Marine Le Pen, recount the vote! I do not trust Arabic numbers, use Roman numerals.

What do you get if you put a Marine in charge of a country? We'll find out in le next week.

Signing up for Marine biology this semester was disappointing. I never learned what’s going on in Le Pen’s head.

What type of pen does the marine use? Le Pen!

What do you call a group of musicians in the military? Marine 5

What's the difference between a marine and a bunch of cars at a junkyard? One goes to sea, the other's cease to go

What do you call a marine with an IQ of 70? General

Why is there a flap on the back of the Navy uniform? So the Marine have something to hold on to.

Where does marine wildlife get treated? The Squid-ward.

I work for a company who specialises in vacuum packed marine mammals. We're famous for our airtight seal.

I am starting a sanctuary for oversized marine mammals. It's called Habitat for Huge Manatees.

What's the difference between a dog and a marine biologist? One wags it's tail, while the other tags a whale

Did you hear about the patriotic zombie who wanted to serve his country? He joined the Marine Corpse.

What did the marine eat for lunch? Semper fries

Why did the marine biologist jump off a bridge? He lost his porpoise in life.

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Long Marine Jokes

A United States Marine was deployed to Afghanistan

A United States Marine was deployed to Afghanistan.

While he was there he received a "Dear John" letter from his girlfriend.

In the letter she explained that she had slept with two guys while he had been gone and she wanted to break up with him. To add injury to the insult, she said she wanted back the picture of herself that she had given him.

So the Marine did what any squared\-away Marine would do. He went around to his buddies and collected all the unwanted photos of women he could find. In all, he got more than 25 pictures of various women \(some with clothes and some without\).

He then mailed them to his now\-former girlfriend with the following note: "I don't remember which one you are. Please remove your picture and send the rest back."

The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.

The next day, the kids came back and, one by one, began to tell their stories. There were all the regular types of stuff: spilled milk and pennies saved. But then the teacher realized, much to her dismay, that she had missed Janie.

“Janie, do you have a story to share?”

“Yes, ma’am. My daddy told me a story about my Mommy. She was a Marine pilot in Desert Storm, and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over enemy territory, and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol, and a survival knife. She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn’t break, and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of 20 Iraqi troops. She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, until the blade broke, and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands.”

“Good Heavens,” said the horrified teacher.

“What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story?”

“Stay away from Mommy when she’s been drinking.”

A biker is passing the zoo when he sees a little girl leaning into the lion’s cage.

Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the cuff of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter her under the eyes of her screaming parents.

The biker jumps off his bike, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch. Whimpering from the pain the lion jumps back, letting go of the girl, and the biker brings her to her terrified parents, who thank him endlessly.

A New York Times reporter has watched the whole event. The reporter says, “Sir, this was the most gallant and brave thing I saw a man do in my whole life.” The biker replies, “Why, it was nothing, really, the lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger, and acted as I felt right.”

The reporter says, “Well, I’m a journalist from the New York Times, and tomorrow’s paper will have this story on the front page… so, what do you do for a living and what political affiliation do you have?”

The biker replies, “I’m a U.S. Marine and a Republican.”

The following morning the biker buys The New York Times to see if it indeed brings news of his actions, and reads, on the front page:

“U.S. MARINE ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT AND STEALS HIS LUNCH.”

One Marine is better than...

A large group of Isis fighters in Iraq are moving down a road when they hear a voice call from behind a sand dune:
"One Marine is better than ten Isis fighters".

The Isis commander quickly orders 10 of best men over the dune where a gun battle breaks out and continues for a few minutes, then silence.

The voice once again calls out: "One Marine is better than one hundred Isis 'S.O.B.'s'".

Furious, the Isis commander sends his next best 100 troops over the dune and instantly a huge gun fight commences.
After 10 minutes of battle, again silence.

The voice calls out again: "One Marine is better than a thousand Isis fighters." The enraged Isis commander musters 1,000 fighters and sends them to the other side of the dune. Rifle fire, machine guns, grenades, rockets and cannon fire ring out as a terrible fight is fought ... then silence.

Eventually, one badly wounded Isis fighter crawls back over the dune and with his dying words tells his commander, "Don't send any more men ... it's a trap. There's two of them."

Marines

Two Marines boarded a quick shuttle flight out of Dallas, headed for Houston. One sat in the window seat, the other sat in the middle seat. Just before take-off, an Army soldier got on and took the aisle seat next to the two Marines. The Soldier kicked off his shoes, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Marine in the window seat said, “I think I’ll get up and get a coke.” “No problem,” said the Soldier, “I’ll get it for you.” While he was gone, the Marine picked up the Soldier’s shoe and spit in it. When the Soldier returned with the coke, the Marine in the middle seat said, “That looks good, I think I’ll have one too.” Again, the Soldier obligingly went to fetch it and while he was gone, the Marine picked up the soldier’s other shoe and spit in it. The Soldier returned and they all sat back and enjoyed the rest of the short flight to Houston. As the plane was landing, the Soldier slipped his feet into his shoes and knew immediately what had happened. “How long must this go on?” the Soldier asked. “This fighting between our services? This hatred? This animosity? This spitting in shoes and peeing in cokes?”

Two Marines boarded a flight...

Two Marines boarded a quick shuttle flight out of Dallas, headed for Houston. One sat in the window seat, the other sat in the middle seat. Just before take-off, an Army soldier got on and took the aisle seat next to the two Marines. The Soldier kicked off his shoes, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Marine in the window seat said, “I think I’ll get up and get a coke.” “No problem,” said the Soldier, “I’ll get it for you.” While he was gone, the Marine picked up the Soldier’s shoe and spit in it. When the Soldier returned with the coke, the Marine in the middle seat said, “That looks good, I think I’ll have one too.” Again, the Soldier obligingly went to fetch it and while he was gone, the Marine picked up the soldier’s other shoe and spit in it. The Soldier returned and they all sat back and enjoyed the rest of the short flight to Houston. As the plane was landing, the Soldier slipped his feet into his shoes and knew immediately what had happened. “How long must this go on?” the Soldier asked. “This fighting between our services? This hatred? This animosity? This spitting in shoes and peeing in cokes?”

There's a Marine in Afghanistan

A marine was deployed to Afghanistan. While he was there, he received a letter from his girlfriend. In the letter she explained that she had slept with two guys while he had been gone and she wanted to break up with him. She also wanted the pictures of herself back.

So, the marine did what any other man would do. He went around to his buddies and collected all the unwanted photos of women he could find. He then mailed about 24 pictures of women (with clothes and some without) to his ex-girlfriend with the following note:

"I don't remember which one you are. Please remove your picture and send the rest back."

It was a dark, stormy, night.

The Marine was on his first assignment, and it was guard duty.

A General stepped out taking his dog for a walk. The nervous young Private snapped to attention, made a perfect salute, and snapped out “Sir, Good Evening, Sir!”

The General, out for some relaxation, returned the salute and said “Good evening soldier, nice night, isn’t it?”

Well it wasn’t a nice night, but the Private wasn’t going to disagree with the General, so the he saluted again and replied “Sir, Yes Sir!”.

The General continued, “You know there’s something about a stormy night that I find soothing, it’s really relaxing. Don’t you agree?”

The Private didn’t agree, but them the private was just a private, and responded “Sir, an amazing night, Sir!”

The General, pointing at the dog, “This is a Golden Retriever, the best type of dog to train.”

The Private glanced at the dog, saluted yet again and said “Sir, It is the best, Sir!”

The General continued “I got this dog for my wife.”

The Private simply said “Sir, Good trade Sir!”

Semper Fi, Motherf*****

A Taliban division is patrolling the desert when, over a nearby dune, they hear a voice call out "One Marine is worth 10 Taliban." The Taliban commander sends 10 of his men over the dune, and a gun battle ensues, then silence.

Then the voice laughs and says "One marine is tougher than 100 Taliban." Angered, the commander sends 100 of his troops over the dune. A fierce gun battle breaks out, then silence.

Then the voice once again calls out: "The Taliban are wimps. One Marine can smash 1000 of you cowards!" Enraged, the commander sends 1000 of his best men over the dune. Bullets are flying everywhere, grenades exploding left and right, and then silence again.

Then, through the smoke, one badly wounded Taliban soldier crawls back over the dune. He looks at his commander and says "Don't send any more men, it's a trap. There are actually TWO of them!"

Farm kid writes letter home after joining Marines....

Dear Ma and Pa:

I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick before all of the places are filled.

I was restless at first because you get to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m. But I am getting used to it, so I like to sleep late. Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot, and shine some things. No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing.

Men got to shave but it is not so bad, there’s warm water. Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, etc., but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular food, but tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the two city boys that live on coffee. Their food, plus yours, holds you until noon when you get fed again. It’s no wonder these city boys can’t walk much.

We go on “route marches,” which the platoon sergeant says are long walks to harden us. If he thinks so, it’s not my place to tell him different. A “route march” is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks.

The sergeant is like a school teacher. He nags a lot. The Captain is like the school board. Majors and colonels just ride around and frown. They don’t bother you none.

This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for shooting. I don’t know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk head and don’t move, and it ain’t shooting at you like the Higgett boys at home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don’t even load your own cartridges. They come in boxes.

Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle with them city boys. I have to be real careful though, they break real easy. It ain’t like fighting with that ole bull at home. I’m about the best they got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Lake . I only beat him once. He joined up the same time as me, but I’m only 5’6″ and 130 pounds and he’s 6’8″ and near 300 pounds dry.

Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellers get onto this setup and come stampeding in.

Your loving daughter,

Alice

By the time a Marine pulled into a little town, every hotel room was taken.

"You've got to have a room somewhere," he pleaded. "Or just a bed, I don't care where."

"Well, I do have a double room with one occupant, a Navy guy," admitted the manager, "and he might be glad to split the cost.

But to tell you the truth, he snores so loudly that people in adjoining rooms have complained in the past.

I'm not sure it'd be worth it to you."

"No problem," the tired Marine assured him.

"I'll take it." The next morning the Marine came down to breakfast bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.

"How'd you sleep?" Asked the manager.

"Never better."

The manager was impressed.

No problem with the other guy snoring, then?"

"Nope, I shut him up in no time."

Said the Marine. "How'd you manage that?" asked the manager.

"He was already in bed, snoring away, when I came in the room," the Marine explained.

"I went over, gave him a kiss on the cheek, said, 'Goodnight, beautiful,' and he sat up all night watching me."

My dad told me this is why different branches of the military have so much trouble communicating.

They all have different vocabulary. For instance; "Secure that building."

Tell a marine that and he'll go kill everyone inside.

Tell a soldier and he'll put up razor wire, sandbags, and machine gun nests.

Tell a sailor and he'll go in and close and lock all the windows and doors.

Tell an airman and he will take out a lease with an option to buy.

A Marine received a "Dear John" letter from his girlfriend back home...

It read as follows:

---

*Michael*,

*I can no longer continue our relationship. The distance between us is too great and too long. I must confess that I have cheated on you twice, and this situation is not fair for either of us. I'm really sorry.*

*Love, Elizabeth*

*P.S. Please return the picture you have of me*

---

The Marine, his feelings hurt, asked his fellow Marines for any snapshots they had of mothers, sisters, girlfriends, cousins, ex-girlfriends, or aunts they had. After a while he had obtained a sizeable collection, and so he stuffed them all 62 of them into an envelope, including the picture of Elizabeth, along with this letter:

---

*Elizabeth,*

*I can't quite remember what you look like. Please take your picture from the pile and return the rest.*

*Take care, Michael*

The pentagon said they had too many generals running around, so they decided to get rid of some of them.

They offered $10,000 in severance pay for each inch of their body -- to be measured however they chose.
The Air Force general went first. He said he wanted to be measured from his head to his toe. He was 69 inches. He received $690,000.
Next up was the Army general. He wanted to be measured from the tip of his finger to the tip of his other finger. It was 80 inches. He received $800,000.
The two generals were very happy with their earnings.
Finally the Marine general came up. He said he wanted to be measured from the tip of his d**k to the tip of his balls. The man said, ''Sir, do you know how much the other generals received?''
The general said no. ''Sir, they received $690,000 and $800,000 respectively, are you sure that is what you want measured?''
The general said, ''Just do it!''
The man dropped the general's pants and measured his d**k. When he went for the general's balls, they weren't there. The man said, ''Sir, where are your balls?"
The general said, ''I left them back in Vietnam.''

The Marine and the Liberal Arts Major

A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young, idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom
approached the Sergeant Major for conversation.

"Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?"

"Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature."

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action."

"Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself."

The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner.

Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you got any?"

"1955, ma'am."

"Well, there you are. You really need to chill out and quit taking everything so seriously! I mean, no nookie since 1955!"

She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times.

Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955!"

The Sergeant Major, glancing at his watch, said in his matter-of-fact voice, "I hope not, it's only 2130 now."

One Marine is better than ten taliban

A large group of Taliban soldiers are moving down a road when they hear a voice call from behind a sand-dune. "One Marine is better than ten taliban".

The Taliban commander quickly sends 10 of his best soldiers over the dune whereupon a gun-battle breaks out and continues for a few minutes, then silence.

The voice then calls out "One Marine is better than one hundred taliban". Furious, the Taliban commander sends his next best 100 troops over the dune and instantly a huge gun fight commences. After 10 minutes of battle, again silence.

The voice calls out again "One Marine is better than one thousand Taliban". The enraged Taliban Commander musters one thousand fighters and sends them across the dune. Cannon, rocket and machine gun fire ring out as a huge battle is fought. Then silence.

Eventually one wounded Taliban fighter crawls back over the dune and with his dying words tells his commander, "Don't send any more men, its a trap. There's actually two of them.

military jokes

"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."
--U.S. Marine Corps

"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."
--USAF Ammo Troop

"If the enemy is in range, so are you."
--Infantry Journal

"A slipping gear could let your m203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."
--Army's magazine of prevention maintenance

"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed."
--U.S. Air Force manual

"Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo."
--Infantry Journal

"Tracers work both ways."
--U.S. Army Ordnance

"Five-second fuses only last three seconds."
--Infantry Journal

"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."
--David Hackworth

"If your attack is going too well, you're walking into an ambush."
--Infantry Journal

"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection."
--Joe Gay

"Any ship can be a minesweeper....once."
--Anon

"Never tell the platoon sergeant you have nothing to do."
--Unknown Marine Recruit

"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."
--Infantry Journal

"If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him."
--USAF Ammo Troop

Bill Clinton steps off of a helicopter onto the White House lawn

He's carrying a pig under each arm. A marine who's there to greet him says, "Nice pigs, sir!" Clinton responds, "Thank you! I got one for Hillary and one for Chelsea." The marine replies, "Nice trade, sir!"

A United States Marine was deployed to Afghanistan.

While he was there he received a "Dear John" letter from his girlfriend. In the letter she explained that she had slept with two guys while he had been gone and she wanted to break up with him.

To add injury to the insult, she said she wanted back the picture of herself that she had given him.

So the Marine did what any squared-away Marine would do. He went around to his buddies and collected all the unwanted photos of women he could find.

In all, he got more than 25 pictures of various women (some with clothes and some without).

He then mailed them to his now-former girlfriend with the following note:

"I don't remember which one you are. Please remove your picture and send the rest back."

Two Marines boarded a quick shuttle flight out of Dallas, headed for Houston.

One sat in the window seat, the other sat in the middle seat.

Just before take-off, an Army soldier got on and took the aisle seat next to the two Marines.

The Soldier kicked off his shoes, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Marine in the window seat said, “I think I’ll get up and get a coke.”

“No problem,” said the Soldier, “I’ll get it for you.”

While he was gone, the Marine picked up the Soldier’s shoe and spit in it.

When the Soldier returned with the coke, the Marine in the middle seat said, “That looks good, I think I’ll have one too.”

Again, the Soldier obligingly went to fetch it and while he was gone, the Marine picked up the soldier’s other shoe and spit in it.

The Soldier returned and they all sat back and enjoyed the rest of the short flight to Houston.

As the plane was landing, the Soldier slipped his feet into his shoes and knew immediately what had happened.

“How long must this go on?” the Soldier asked.

“This fighting between our services?

This hatred?

This animosity?

This spitting in shoes and peeing in cokes?”

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