Contents
Funniest Jokes
New Jokes
Funniest Ear Jokes
Told my son to stop playing Russian roulette, but you know how it is with kids... In one ear, out the other.
I told my son to stop playing Russian roulette, but you know how it is with kids... In one ear, out the other!
What is the most sensitive part of your body while pleasuring yourself? Your ear listening for foot steps.
My girlfriend got a tattoo of a shell on her thigh Every time I lay my ear on it I can smell the sea.
I went to a restaurant.
It was full; no place to sit...
I took out my mobile,
Placed it to my ear and said loudly- "Bro come fast, she's here with someone else...
Six couples ran away
Captain Kirk actually has 3 ears. The first is the left ear, the second is the right ear, and then there's the final frontier.
How do you know when a blonde is having a bad day? When she can't find her pencil and there is a tampon behind her ear.
How many ears does Captain Kirk have?
3.
His left ear.
His right ear.
And the final frontier.
My wife recently got a seashell tattooed on her thigh. When you put your ear close to it, you can really smell the ocean.
Went to see my doctor about a blocked ear
He asked me to describe the symptoms.
I said “homer is a fat bloke and marge has blue hair”
My girlfriend has a tattoo of a conch shell on her inner thigh. When I put my ear to it, I can smell the ocean.
My girlfriend
has a tattoo of a sea shell on her inner thigh.
If you put your ear to it, I swear you could smell the ocean.
how many ears does Captain Kirk have? Three, the right ear, the left ear and the final frontier
How much does it cost a pirate to get his ear pierced? A buccaneer.
What did the ear say after it was hit with a high frequency? It Hz.
My Ex had a tattoo of a seashell on her inner thigh If you put your ear to it you could smell the ocean.
When I was a kid I figured out how to play the piano by ear. After a while I learned that it was easier to use my fingers.
[In honor of Leonard Nimoy] How many ears does Spock have? Three. A left ear, a right ear, and a final frontier.
Why did Van Gogh become a painter? Because he didn't have an ear for music.
This will blow your mind! If you take the pin out of a grenade and put your ear to the hole you can hear the faint sound of the world wide I.Q average increasing.
I went skydiving today. The guy strapped himself to me, we jumped out of the plane, and as we began to fall he yelled in my ear "So how long you been an instructor?
My girlfriend has a seashell tattooed on her inner thigh. If you put your ear to it, you can smell the ocean.
How many ears does Mr. Spock have? Three; a left ear, a right ear and the final front ear.
Astute Diagnosis
A guy goes to the doctor, with a carrot up his nose. He's got a piece of celery in his other nostril, and a banana in his ear. He says,"Doc, I don't feel so good."
The doctor says,"You're not eating right."
How much do pirates charge for piercings? A buck an ear.
What do you call a polar bear wearing ear muffs? Anything you want. He can't hear you!
How many ears does Spock have? Three. The left ear, the right ear, and the final front ear.
Did you know? If you put a hard hat up to your ear... ...you can hear the OSHA
What is it called when a dog has one ear that stands up and one that flops down? Earectile dysfunction
If you lose your hearing,... is it ear replaceable?
A buffalo hunter and a Native American guide
One day when they were hunting the guide stopped, put his ear to the ground and listened, then said "Buffalo come"
The hunter asked "How can you tell"
The guide replied "Ear sticky"
How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Three. His left ear, his right ear, and his final front-ear.
How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced? A buck 'n ear
My girlfriend got a tattoo of a conch shell on her inner thigh...
Every time I lay my ear on it I can smell the ocean.
If I lie there long enough, I get crabs on my forehead.
A blonde gets a tattoo...
...On her inner thigh of a conch shell.
Friend: Why did you get a conch shell tattoo on your inner thigh?
Blonde: So that when you put your ear against it you can smell the ocean.
Two Men Were Hunting Buffalo
One put his ear to the ground
He lifted his head up and said "Buffalo come"
The other said "How do you know?"
He said "ear sticky"
An Indian and a cowboy were buffalo hunting together
The Indian suddenly knelt down, pressed his ear against the ground and said "Buffalo come."
The cowboy was amazed by this and asked him "how do you know this?"
The Indian replied: "Sticky."
Do you know why Van Gogh got into painting Be cause he didn't have an ear for music.
Why did the deaf man put a watch on his ear? Because he wanted to hear all the time.