Helium Jokes

Just quit my job at the helium factory. I will not be spoken to in that tone of voice.

What did the scientist say when he found two isotopes of helium? HeHe...

Im making bad chemistry jokes coz all the good ones argon

Some people say filling animals with helium is wrong but i say, whatever floats your goat

After an altercation with my boss, I decided to leave my job at the helium factory. I refuse to be spoken to in that tone of voice.

I swallowed two cans of helium today HeHe

Some say filling animals with helium is wrong But I say whatever floats your goat

How do you treat a sick chemist? If you can't curium and you can't helium, you might as well barium.

Oxygen tried to pick a fight with Helium Helium didn't react at all, he simply rose above, Carbon was watching the whole thing and said, "That's very noble of you"

What do you do with sick chemists? If you can't helium or curium, you barium.

People say filling animals with helium is wrong but i say, whatever floats your goat.

Have you heard the one about the sick chemist? If you can't helium and you can't curium, you'll probably have to barium.

Three helium atoms walk into a bar HeHeHe

Helium, neon, argon, krypton, xenon and argon walk into a bar. The bartender shouted at them: "GET OUT!"

They didn't react.

I quit my job at the helium gas factory I refused to be spoken to in that tone of voice

Quit my job at the helium factory I'm not gonna let them talk to me like that.

LPT: If your dentist has no painkillers, ask him for Helium. It will be hilarious when you scream.

Helium walks into a bar The bartender says "we don't serve noble gases here, get out!"

He doesn't react.

Quit my job at the helium factory today I refuse to be spoken to in that tone

People tell me filling animals with helium is bad.. But i say whatever floats your goat.

Helium walks into a bar... ...and the bartender says to him, "We don't serve Noble gasses here!".

Helium... doesn't react.

Some say putting helium in animals is wrong. I say whatever floats your goat.

I quit my job working at a helium factory I refuse to be spoken to in that tone.

That one about the three helium atoms is pretty funny. HeHeHe

Some people say that filling animals with helium is wrong.. I say, "whatever floats your goat"

Two Helium atoms were acting funny HeHe

I quit my job at the helium factory today I won't stand to be spoke to in that tone of voice

Helium walks into a bar The bartender says "sorry we don't serve noble gases here."

The helium did not react

Quit my job at the helium factory today. I wouldn't be spoken to in that tone of voice.

My friend takes helium recreationally. He speaks very highly about it.

Why are Helium, Curium, and Barium called the medical isotopes? Because if you can't helium or curium, you barium.

What do you call it when Argon, Neon, Krypton, Xenon, Radon, and Helium frequently attend church? Noble Masses.

Some people think that killing animals with helium is wrong... I don’t judge…

Whatever floats your goat.

Did you all hear about the sick Chemist? If they don't Helium or Curium soon they'll have to Barium

Helium walks into a bar... The bartender says, "we don't serve Noble Gases here."

Helium does not react.

Have you heard about the sick chemist? If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, you’ll probably have to barium.

I once worked in a helium factory It wasn't a very nice job, because of the leaks, but the owner was very sympathetic and we all spoke highly of her.

Apparently filling animals with helium is "abuse", pfft Whatever floats your goat, I guess.

I just got hired at the helium factory I find the job uplifting.

Oxygen, helium, sulphur, sodium and phosphorus walk in to a bar... OH SNaP