Welsh Jokes

I used to go out with a Welsh girl who had 36DDs. I had no idea how to pronounce her name.

I once dated a Welsh girl with 36 DDs. Longest surname I've ever seen.

The wife just told me"I think you've had an affair with that Welsh tart, from Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch"..... I said, "How can you say such a thing?"

What's the Welsh word for shearing a sheep? Foreplay

I asked my Welsh friend... How many shags have you had?

He started counting then fell asleep.

Did you know the first condoms were invented by the Welsh out of sheep's intestines? The English improved on the invention by taking the intestines out of the sheep before using them.

What is the most popular bank in Wales? Welsh Fargo...

...gramps made me do it.

Short joke I thought of. What's the difference between sheep and women?

The Welsh don't know yet either.

A Welsh guy was getting his driver's license. He had to take a vision test, so they showed him a line of letters that said: B W N S T R Y D D W L L

They asked, "Can you read the letters?" The man replied, "Are you kidding? I'm *from* that town!"

How do you pronounce oddly spelt Welsh words? Caerphilly

I asked my Welsh friend how many partners he's had in his life... he started to count and he fell asleep.

Do dolphins speak Welsh? Or is it just Wales.

My Welsh grandfather passed away yesterday He died peacefully in his sheep.

Why do the Welsh wear kilts? Because sheep can hear zippers from a mile away

TIL that the Welsh first made condoms out of sheep intestines The English then improved the idea by taking it out of the animal first

How do you pronounce a Welsh town? Caerphilly

How does a Welsh man find a sheep in talk grass? Irresistible.

A Welsh man goes for an eye test. Doctor: Can you read this chart from top to bottom please.

Welshman: Read it!? I know the guy!

We were driving through the Welsh countryside when my little girl said… "Look at that strange animal daddy, man at the back, sheep at the front."

The best way to eat Welsh cheese? Caerphilly.

What do the Welsh call a sheep when it's tied to a lamp post? The leisure centre.

I had a welsh friend who tried counting all his lovers to me but each time, I kept falling asleep

The Welsh were among the first to use sheep intestines as condoms.... The English perfected them by removing them from the sheep before using.

How do Welsh people name their towns? Caerphilly

How do you make a Welsh person comfortable while playing Scrabble? Remove the vowels in his rack.

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar... ...to watch the Welsh play in the quarter-final

How do Welsh farmers find their sheep in the long grass? Delightful!

Did you hear about the Welsh baseball referee who circles the world each day? The sun never sets on the British umpire.

The Welsh have been using sheep intestine as a contraceptive for hundreds of years. It is only recently that they have decided to take the intestine out of the sheep.

What sound do Welsh sheep make? \#MeeehToo

"It's said like it's spelt" is easy to follow Unless it's said by a Welsh person

What you call a healthy, large aquatic mammal living in a structure that gives access to ground water that is located west of England? A well Welsh well whale

What do you call a welsh man with a sheep under each arm? A pimp.

How does a Welsh man pleasure himself at the cliff edge with a pair of large Wellington boots? He puts the back legs of a sheep into his boots and walks towards the edge.

What do you get if you cross a popular children's clay animation character with a Welsh microwave oven? A Popty-Pingu

Why do Welsh wear kilts? Because sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

I was told it was racist to use "welsh" when someone won't pay a bet. They said to use "renege". So I called them a bunch of renegers instead.

How do you say goodbye to a Welsh person? Farewelsh.

Do androids dream of electric sheep? Only the Welsh ones.