Hilarious Bridge Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Bridge Jokes

Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton and Jeb Bush jump of a bridge. They do a race who hits the ground first. Who wins? Society

Score: 255

A blonde stands on the bank of a river There is no bridge in sight. She sees another blonde across the river and shouts:

How do I get to the other side of the river?!

The other blonde shouts back:

Why? You already are on the other side!

Score: 149

What did the physicist say to the suicidal guy on the bridge? Don't do it! You have potential!

Score: 127

Authorities fear that the collapsed bridge in Genoa was made with 'Mafia' concrete..... ....they've found 6 more bodies than there were people missing.

Score: 106

Why could no one hear Helen Keller cry for help when she fell off a bridge? She was wearing mittens

Score: 101

Score: 69

A cop parks at the bottom of a bridge, waiting for a speeder. He pulls a man over for doing 40 over the speed limit, and says, "Son, I've been waiting for you all day." The man quickly responds, "Well, I got here as fast as I could!"

Score: 62

What do you call a green bat that walks across a yellow bridge? I don’t know, but at least it isn’t a repost

Score: 60

I bumped into an old school friend today... He said "life is great! I live in a $2 million mansion!"

I said "that's nice, I live under a $5 million bridge!"

Score: 57

My son made this up. The Dad Joke is strong with this one... Son: What does Darth Vader use to get to the bridge of his ship?

Me: No clue, son

Son: An ele-Vader, ha!

Score: 55

What do you get when you cross a bridge with a car? You get to the other side.

Score: 39

A woman is about to jump off a bridge. A physicist walks by and says, "Don't do it! You have so much potential!"

Score: 31

Life is like a game of bridge If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand

Score: 22

If you jumped off a bridge in Paris You'd be In seine

Score: 21

I wanted to make a joke about a bridge but I thought I might need to build the suspense first

Score: 18

Ancient humans, venturing across the ice bridge to North America, got lost quite often. They found it very hard to keep their Bering Strait.

Score: 15

Relationships are like the card game bridge... If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

Score: 15

My friends all tell me I’m a Pyromaniac... I tell them not to worry. We’ll burn that bridge when we get to it.

Score: 14

What did the engineer say to the bridge after it had collapsed? I trussed you.

Score: 13

My wife and I are finally planning a trip to San Francisco for my life long dream of seeing the Golden Gate in person. She said, “What are you going to do when you finally see it?”

I said, “Let’s cross that bridge when we get there.”

Score: 13

What do you call it when a frog jumps off a bridge? Kermitting suicide.

Score: 12

Two homeless men... were sitting under a bridge watching a dog lick its crotch.

One of the men said, "I wish I could do that!"
To which the other replied, "Oh no you don't! He took a bite outta my arm the last time I tried!"

Score: 11

Why did the Mexican push his wife off the bridge? Tequila

Score: 11

If you jumped off a bridge in Paris You would be IN SEIN.....

Score: 11

People always give bridge builders a hard time... They're just trying to make ends meet.

Score: 10

Q.: "Governor, what would you say if Trump picked you as his running mate?" Christie: "I'll close down that bridge when I get to it."

Score: 10

A bridge killed my family... We're arch enemies now.

Score: 10

How did the guitarist die? He crashed his pickup into a bridge and broke his neck.

Score: 10

Why did the mexican man throw his wife off a bridge? He wanted tequila.

Score: 9

I heard somebody making fun of bridge suicides the other day and I was a bit offended I don't think they understood the gravity of the situation

Score: 9

I knew a guitar player who died... He was going to a gig when he crashed his pickup into the bridge and broke his neck. It appeared his pedal had stopped working.

Score: 9

Why didn't the engineer cross his own bridge? Because he didn't truss it.

Score: 6

Chris Christie just entered the race! He's gonna shut down Trump like the George Washington Bridge :-D

Score: 5

What do you tell a person who is about to jump off a bridge and commit suicide "Don't do it! You have so much potential"

Score: 5

A man tries to cross a river but there is no bridge. He sees a man across the river and yells:

“How do I get to the other side?”

The man answers back:

“You are on the other side!”

Score: 4

Genoa bout the bridge collapse in Italy? Ah well, we won't go over it then.

Score: 3

I saw an American Bridge player crying last night She said she bid 4 No Trump

Score: 3

Why were the Roman soldiers so good at making friends? Because of their frequent bridge building exercises.

Score: 3

So I heard Chris Christie is delving into sports radio... It would give all those people stuck on the bridge something to listen to.

Score: 2

A boss is about to fire his engineer after a bridge collapses. But after seeing the engineer weeping, tells him "oh cry me a river, just build a new one and get over it."

Score: 2

New Bridge Jokes

I saw a news article on the internet. I saw a news article on the internet. It was about a truck that went over the side of a bridge.
You can say it was semi-descent.

Score: 1

Don't ever burn your bridges when you are leaving a job. Especially if you are a bridge builder. That's like super illegal.

Score: 2

Pete and Re-Pete are walking across the bridge Pete falls off who is left? Re-Pete.

Pete and Re-Pete are walking across the bridge Pete falls off who is left?

Re-Pete.

Pete and Re-Pete are walking across the bridge Pete falls off who is left?

Re-Pete

Score: 2

What does the iconic bridge in San Francisco and my favorite shower have in common? They’re both golden.

Score: 1

What did the Jewish Bostonian woman declare to her Sunday bridge group about her recent knitting project? "I'm so AUtistic!"

EDIT: Ahtistic.

Score: 2

Anthony Kiedis became upset when someone rudely suggested that his song titles needed to be more descriptive. He eventually realized that they had a point but it’s ok..... It’s Water Under The Bridge now.

Score: 1

A woman stands on the edge of a bridge about to commit suicide. An English teacher spots her. "Don't jump!" he cries. "You have so much for which to live!"

Score: 1

What do "Ghostbusters" and "Bridge to Terabithia" have in common? Don't cross the streams.

Score: 2

I was going to make a joke about actin and myosin... but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it

Score: 2

My wife wanted me to give up poker night with the guys, so I talked her into joining a Bridge club. She jumps next Tuesday.

Score: 1

I was going to build a bridge for karma but I got over it.

Score: 1

It was very difficult to get my degree in civil engineering. But I built a bridge and got over it.

Score: 1

After the US Presidential Election, I can't play bridge properly anymore... Bidding No Trump doesn't work

Score: 1

Why was the truck scared to cross the bridge? Because it was a freight.

Score: 1

A physic's major jumps from a bridge When the teacher hears the news he sobs - "He had so much potential!"

Score: 0