Hilarious Bull Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Bull Jokes

This morning I made my coffee using Red Bull instead of water... ...After 15 minutes on the highway I realized I left my car at home...

Score: 710

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I love how Pit Bull announces himself at the beginning of every song giving us time to change the song.

Score: 460

I once mixed Red Bull and coffee After 20 minutes on highway I noticed that I forgot my car at home

Score: 270

There are two cows standing in a field.... The first cow says to the other, “I was artificially inseminated this morning.” The second cow replies, “No way, I don’t believe you.” The first says, “It’s true, no bull.”

Score: 182

A group of teenagers robbed our local supermarket and stole 180 cans of red bull. I don't know how these people can sleep at night.

Score: 180

I didn't sleep so well last night... So this morning I made my coffee with Red Bull instead of water.

I made it halfway to work before I realized I forgot my car.

Score: 91

Someone stole hundreds of cans of Red Bull from our local store. I don’t know how they can sleep at night.

Score: 66

I got really frustrated and my wife warned me not to cuss when the kids were around. Me: This is such bull-

Wife: Shhh, say snake instead

Me: Oh right.. This is such snakeshit

Close one

Score: 57

One cow says to another, "I was artificially inseminated this morning." The second cow replies, "No way, I don't believe you."

The first says, "It's true, no bull."

Score: 53

Rescue attempts are being made to save a bull stranded on Mt. Everest Reports confirm that the steaks have never been higher.

Score: 52

A couple of guys stole hundreds of cans of Red Bull from our neighborhood store. I don’t know how they can sleep at night.

Score: 45

Someone broke into my local corner shop and stole 30 cases of Red Bull last night Honestly, I don't know how these people sleep at night

Score: 36

Never believe minotaurs... Half of everything they say is bull.

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A bull was sent to prison for violently running into a man and killing him Guilty as charged

Score: 27

What's the difference between a bull and a cow? A bull smiles when you milk it.

Score: 25

What's yellow and hurts when it gets in your eye? Bull dozer

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What's the difference between a bull and a Samsung Note 7? I'm not scared when the bull charges

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My coffee wasn't strong enough. So, yesterday instead of using water, I brewed with Red Bull. I got halfway to work before I realised I'd forgotten my car.

Score: 20

The Mayor’s meal In Spain, there is a tradition after a bullfight to serve the mayor the bull’s testicles.

One day after a bullfight, the mayor asks the waiter: “Funny, why are they so small today?”

The waiter: “Today, sir, the bull won.”

Score: 20

What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit bull

Score: 20

The most heinous crime--against both Man and Nature--would be to plant dynamite inside cattle That, my friends, would be a-bomb-in-a-bull...

Score: 18

Two cows are standing next to each other in a field... Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning."

"I don't believe you," says Dolly.

Daisy exclaims, "It's true, no bull!"

Score: 18

Someone stole £5000 worth of Red Bull from a local delivery truck. How do these people sleep at night?

Score: 18

To whomever broke into my shop and stole three hundred cans of Red Bull: I don't know how you can sleep at night.

Score: 18

Bobby told Billy he stopped a stampede. That was the biggest bunch of bull he ever herd.

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Thieves stole 30 crates of red bull from our local supermarket I don’t know how they sleep at night

Score: 17

What do you get when you cross a border collie with a pit bull? A dog that is smart enough to bury the bodies.

Score: 16

Tried to make my coffee with Red Bull today... I made it all the way to work before I realized I had forgotten my truck.

Score: 16

What animal has four legs and one arm? A pit bull on a playground.

Score: 16

Old joke (1930s) - Little kid comes in late to school. Teacher says, "Why ya late?"... Kid says, "Had a take a heifer down—get 'er bred."

Teacher says, "Couldn't your father do it?"

Kid says, "Sure he could, but not as good as the bull."

Score: 13

This morning I mixed Red Bull with my coffee This morning I mixed Red Bull with my coffee. I was more than half way to work before I realized that I forgot my car.

Score: 13

I'm in a band called Tired Bull. You should come to one of our shows.

We don't charge.

Score: 8

What do you call a half bull dog half shitzu? Bullshit

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I mixed my coffee with Red Bull this morning. I was halfway to work before I realized I forgot my car.

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Did you hear about the cow tipper that got attacked by a bull? He got a taste of his own meadow sin.

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How do you tell the difference between a bull and a cow? The bull has horns, and the cow is the udder one.

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Why did the bucking bull retire? So it could become a bull dozer

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What do you call it when a bull masturbates? Stroganoff.

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This kid that used to pick on me would drink Red Bull and give literally everyone in the entire school a nasty super atomic wedgie, even the teachers! He was certainly a hyperbole

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New Bull Jokes

I bred a Bull dog and a Shih-tzu together I call it a Bullshit

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Why did the bull broke up with the Matador? Cause all they saw were red flags.

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I guess Bull Cosby found his own key to happiness... A Flat Minor.

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One choice I made years ago tore my family apart. I knew I should’ve held my pit bull on the leash.

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If an Arabic bull sits in the sun for too long... He Istanbul

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what type of animal are you stan for? I stan bull

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Why can't you feed spaghetti to a male cow? Because it's im-pasta-bull.

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What did the bull say to his son after dropping him off to school? Bison

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My brother came to see my new (male ) Pit-bull. The dog sat down ,lifted his leg and started licking his private. My brother said "Man, I wish I could do that!" I thought for a minute and then said "If you are going to try, I think I would pet him first!"

Score: 1

A young farmer's son is late for school. "Why're you late?" asks his teacher.

"I had to help breed a cow," responds the boy.

"Couldn't your father have done that?" retorts the teacher tartly.

"Sure he could", said the boy, "But not as well as the bull."

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What do bull riders and I have in common? We both struggle to last 8 seconds

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What do a bull riders and I have in common? We only try to last 8 seconds

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I told my superstitious friend I was having knee pains She said "I have been reading into astrology and its said that Capricorn, the sea-goat, has more knee pains. Are you a Capricorn?"

I said "No ma'am. I'm a Taurus, and that's bull."

Score: 4

What do cows decorate their birthday parties with? Bull-oons!

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what do you call a sleeping cow a bull-dozer

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Why doesn't the fellowship of the japanese cow demon have any followers? They're asking everyone to believe in bull oni.

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What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs riding a bull? Gord.

I made that joke up when I was 12.

Score: 2

Sorry sir A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.”
The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one.”

Score: 2

An invisible bull is rampaging through the main part of town today. Steer clear.

Score: 1

A woman brings a bull to the doctors. "Doctor! A witch stuck her finger in my husbands ear! Then smacked him on the rear! Then she sang a verse! And he turned into this bull! Can you help?"

"Sorry" the doc said. "I'm afraid it's ear rear verse a bull."

Score: 2

What does a bull call his wife? His significant udder.

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What happens when a bull enter a shop It becomes an idiom

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