Hilarious China Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest China Jokes

My 7 year old nephew showed me with pride the "telephone" he had just made from a string and two tin cans... I pulled out my iPhone and said, "That's nice, but look at what kids your age make in China!"

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Why is suicide illegal in China? Destruction of government property

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I asked my Chinese friend what it's like living in China He said he couldn't complain.

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Did you hear the one about Xi Jinping and China? \[removed\]

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In America, dogs are k-9s But in China, dogs are e-10

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In America, dogs are K9. In China, dogs are E10.

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The protests in Hong Kong have been continuous for 120 days, proving the country does not belong to China Because nothing made in China has ever lasted more than a week.

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Trump says to Pence, "China's mining too many ores" Pence: What are you going to do?
Trump: Order more tariffs to make them mine less.
Pence: Mine fewer.
Trump: Shhh, don't call me that yet.

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My 7-year-old nephew showed me with pride the "telephone" he had just made from a string and two tin cans.... I pulled out my cellphone and said, "That's nice, but look at what kids your age make in China!"

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Why does Donald Trump hate China? Because it has a bigger wall

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Why is the Great Wall of China considered one of the seven wonders of the world? Because it is an actual long-lasting Chinese product.

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My wife recommended I do some light reading to relax at the end of the day... Not really relaxing, as my eyes are in pain, but I managed to make out, "60 Watts - Made in China."

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Why are there no casinos in China? They hate Tibet.

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Guys I think Trump's immigration policies just might work. China built a wall and they have like, no Mexicans.

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Why was the UN concerned when the waiter dropped Thanksgiving dinner? Because it meant the fall of turkey, the ruin of grease, and the breakup of china.

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My boss fired me for making too many Asian jokes. It was the end of my Korea.

I'm still China find another job.

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Here's a joke about China [redacted]

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So china is making phones without Google apps now Guess it was always my way or the huawei

*i'm so sorry, I tried*

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China has been the most important country for American schools. Because they invented both paper and gunpowder.

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I met an Asian girl today with the last name of "China" It was her made-in name

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Joke about China [censored]

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How do I know China has Free Speech? No one says otherwise.

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Say what you want about Trump’s wall But China has had a great wall for thousands of years and you still don’t see any Mexicans

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Fu, Bu and Chu are three Chinese men. One day, they decided to move to the USA.
They also decided to change their names, as to not be discriminated against.
Chu changed his name to Chuck.
Bu changed his name to Buck.
And Fu decided to go back to China.

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Why do children in China all have iPhones and wear Nike? Employee discounts

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I have a friend, Celine, from China. She is beautiful but so fragile. Poor Celine.

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A joke from my old physics professor.. How Long is a battleship. True or false?

False. How Long is a man from China.

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China won bronze in gymnastics at the Sydney 2000 Olympics but were stripped of the medal after it was revealed that Dong Fangxiao was under the minimum age of 16 And they would have gotten away with it if it weren't for those medalling kids.

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I think weekends are made in China They don't last very long, and they take forever to arrive.

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My grandma is kind of like the Chinese government. Visitors only see the nice china.

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Do you want to hear a joke about China? [censored]

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What's all the fuss about Donald Trump's Russian Ties? I know for a fact that all his Ties are made in China.

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The Great Wall Of China Is Famous Because it's the only Chinese product that lasted this long.

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Why does China put all their casinos in Macau? Because they don't like Tibet.

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An Asian girl's last name was China... It was her made-in name

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How do you get the Asian out of a China man? Spin him around until he's disoriented.

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What do World Of Warcraft and China have in common? In both there's tanks used to take down mobs.

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Come on, Trump has no ties in Russia. His ties are made in China. His business loans are in Russia.

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I thought Trump's ties were made in China... Why is everyone saying they're from Russia now?

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New China Jokes

It took some time for every country to have the corona virus but China got it right off the bat

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Which country can play baseball the best? China because they knocked out the entire world with just one bat.

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I got COVID-19 and it took 10 days for my immune system to finally fight it off. Longest anything made in China's lasted for me.

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Did you hear about the new Call of Duty game? It's called:

Call of Communism: Modern China

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You know how when we were kids, we thought if you dig a deep enough hole, you get to China? The NBA is going to try to find out!

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Colin Kaepernick took a lot of criticism for kneeling on one knee for the American flag. But LeBron James is taking even more criticism for getting on both knees for China.

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Did you guys hear the new Childish Gambino remix? “This is America. Don’t talk about China though.”

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My boss fired me for hr reasons. He said I made too many Asian jokes about their dialect. It was the end of my Korea. I'm still China another job.

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McDonalds was once banned in China ..but once they saw how badly they treated their workforce they changed their minds

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What do you call children in China? Euthanasia

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What’s Jehovas Witnesses called in China? Pling Plong

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What happens when you buy Bitcoin in China? \[removed\]

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What do you call a shell fish from China?a A Crust-Asian

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Smart people aren't born there made In China....

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I hated my trip to China Left my review on their flag.

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What’re the 3 most used english words in China? Made in China

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Santa Claus must be Asian.. That's why all of his toys say "Made in China."

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What Is The Hardest Job In The World? Sketching For Police Officers In China

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What do you call a fat Chinese person? The Great Ball of China

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What international disaster occurred after someone dropped the Christmas dinner? The downfall of Turkey, the overthrow of Greece and the destruction of China.

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Why is the population in China so high? Because their condoms are "made in China."

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One day in 1960's China... Mao told his chief of police to send 10,000 intellectuals and a clown to rural exile. The police chief asked "Why the clown?" Mao laughed and said "That's the spirit!"

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I cooked fancy meals for several Asian Nations, but they all left before paying the bill Japan and Vietnam left without forking anything over and Korea totally desserted the place!

If they don't come back, then I may have to fine China

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When I was in China, everybody always told jokes about cow's milk. I would hear them on a dairy basis.

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A son asked his dad where kids were made. The dad replied:
"Everything is made in China. Except kids. They are made from the VaChina."

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Why are there no phone books in China? There are too many wings and wongs, so you might end up winging the wong number!

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Did you hear about the school that burned down in Beijing, China? 25 children died. It was truly tragic.

And the worst part is, they all got out of the building fine, but they just ran around it and then darted back inside.

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Did you hear about the tourist who got lost in China? I dunno man, he just got disoriented

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Blind Date Her: I'm a big country fan

*Trying to Impress her
Me: China is very large

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What is the hardest job in China? A police sketch artist.

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A guy at work went in for a competition and won a trip to China. He's out there now...trying to win a trip back!

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Great dynasties of history Egypt: Ayyubid

South Africa: Zulu

China: Ming

Greece: Helena

Italy: Medici

U.S.: Duck

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One in a million... You're one in a million.
China has a population of a billion people. One billion. That means even if you’re a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you.

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"If you get offended by any jokes today feel free to Tweet your outrage on a phone, made by a 10 year old in China." - Frankie Boyle

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Trump knew about foreign ties They were made in China.

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I don't get all the jokes about Trumps Russian ties. I just looked it up and Trump makes his ties in China

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Our love is like female fetus in China it will never be born

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What's the name of China's best con artist? Foo Ling Yoo

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What do you call a K9 unit in China? The food truck

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What do you call a big ape climbing up the Great Wall of China?? Ching Chong.

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Got this new game today called "Real Life" Tried to login as a female in the china server but it always crashes on the loading sceen

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The Great Wall of China is one of the 7 wonders of the World... For being the only Chinese product to last.

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Why was Asia mad at the President? The President kept China in the cabinet.

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Trump really does make everything overseas He had his shirts made in Korea, his glasses made in China, and his Presidency made in Russia.

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Dogs don't love you... They're just glad they don’t live in China.

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If we really want to destroy china, we should just send all the metal drummers there.

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Do you know the biggest difference between Mexico and China? China paid for it's wall.

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It seems like everything is made in China... ...except for babies. They're made in VaChina

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Why does Donald Trump hate China? They came up with building a wall before he did.

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What was the name of the heaviest man in china? Won ton

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China apologizes for "slanderous" comments about Kim Jong Un. Says they didn't realize he was a part of their fitness protection program.

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Oldie - -Communist China telegrams Soviet Russia Communist China:
WE ARE OUT OF FOOD. SEND GRAIN

Soviet reply:
WE ARE ALSO OUT OF FOOD. TIGHTEN YOUR BELTS

Communist China:
SEND BELTS

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Why, with twice the population of the United States at the time didn't China invent the airplane first? Well, two Wongs don't make a Wright.

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What do Lumber jacks do in China? Chop sticks!

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Why aren't there any telephone books in China? Because, there are so many Wings and Wongs, you might Wing the Wong number.

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China has a population of a billion people. One billion. That means even if you’re a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you.

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Why is it a bad idea for China to become a democracy? Do you know how hard it would be to orchestrate a national erection

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I wanted to buy a patriotic decoration on my trip to China... but I worried the US customs officer would see it as a red flag.

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How do people in China get to work They use the Shanghai-way

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The bears in China discovered a new element... It's Panda-monium

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