Cracker Jokes

What do you call a monkey holding a fire cracker? A Baboom!

Her parents wanted her to date someone of her own ethnicity. But Polly wanted a cracker.

Why do sharks only swim in salt water? (Got this is a Cracker Jack box) Because pepper water makes them sneeze!

What do you get when you place a Russian leader on a cracker? Putin on the Ritz.

Ok, so lets share our Christmas cracker jokes. Mine was awful. A bottle of lemonade fell on a barmans head. Why wasn't he hurt? It was a soft drink.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you left him.



I got this from an Easter cracker. It was pretty dark for Easter which made me laugh even harder.

What's a cracker's favorite band? Panic! at Nabisco.

My redneck cousin wants to be with a girl who is into multiple partners. Cracker wants a poly.

What do you call a Caucasian furry? An animal cracker...

What did one eye say to the other eye? Between you and me, something smells.

Credit: Christmas cracker.

I call the sunshine cracker company every year at this time and request they sell Cheez-its shrunk to 1/4th their original size. I request they market them as "Sweet little baby Cheez-its."

I always wanted to lay naked on a bearskin rug in front of a fireplace... Evidently Cracker Barrel has a policy against this.

What do you call a Caucasian pyromancer Fire Cracker

My redneck cousin is looking for a girl into multiple partners. I told him that was ridiculously cliché... I mean really. Cracker wants a poly?

Someone once asked me, "Do you want a graham cracker?" I said, "First off, please don't call me that..." "... And second off, a gram of what?"

My new girlfriend has a fetish for being covered in cheese and pickle. She's a cracker.

What do you call a white girl with a yeast infection? A cracker with cheese.

What do you call an angry, white supremacist? A saltine cracker.

What do you call a white grandma? a Gram Cracker

If the KKK was meeting for lunch where would they go? Cracker Barrel.

What kind of work out do parrots have on leg day? SQUAAATS!

...Polly want a cracker.

Why didn't the parrot want the black guy to buy him? Polly want a Cracker.

What do you call a team-up between a maniac, a random white guy, and the head of the Vatican? Snapped, Cracker and Pope

I pushed a cracker through the bars of the cage and said, "Who's a pretty boy?" "I want my mommy," he sobbed.

What do call a KKK member that steals your car right in front of you? Cracker Jack.

What did the redneck parrot say? Cracker wants a Polly.

My friend Polly’s parents want her to date someone from her own ethnicity. But Polly wants a cracker.

What do you call a Goldfish cracker cooked on a stove? A gilled cheese

What do you call an old white man who thinks outside the box? A stale cracker

I made a list of the top 10 dad jokes I know. The first 9 are great but the last is an absolute cracker. 1. Great
2. Great
3. Great
4. Great
5. Great
6. Great
7. Great
8. Great
9. Great
10. An absolute cracker

What do you call a beat up white guy Asalted cracker.

What do you call a feminist assassin? A nut cracker.

I've got a Christmas cracker joke so good it can't wait. Why do crackers love Santa? Because he's white.

What happened to the dog that ate a Christmas tree? He farted a cracker.

What do you call a middle eastern cracker? A sultine!

What do you call a bunch of caucasians in a log cabin? Cracker Barrell

Ah, Christmas cracker jokes... ...the cheapest form of comedy

What do you call two white guys competing to beat each other at eating the most caramel popcorn? A Cracker Jack Off

What do you call a really pale Asian? Rice cracker.