Disgusting Jokes

Just found the absolute worst page in the dictionary What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest and disingenuous.

A vegan said to me, "People who sell meat are disgusting." I said, "People who sell vegetables and fruits are grocer."

A Christmas Joke (...maybe a LITTLE early) The guy was in the store buying a fake Christmas tree. The shop attendant asked him, "Are you going to put that tree up yourself?"

The guy replied, "Don't be disgusting! I'm going to put it in the living room!"

My girlfriend's parents called me a disgusting creep just because I am 36 and she is 24 What a horrible thing to say on our son's 10th birthday party.

A vegan said to me, "People who sell meat are disgusting!" I said, "People who sell fruit and vegetables are grocer."

Vegans say whoever sells meat is disgusting, well i say people who sell vegetables are grocer.

A young Korean couple are lying in bed... When the guy starts farting nonstop.

The girl, unable to take the smell, says, "Stop, that's disgusting!"

"Don't blame me", the guy says. "It's the dog."

"Oh, don't blame him", she says. "He was cooked perfectly."

A vegan said to me that people who sell meat are disgusting. I said people who sell fruit and vegetables are grocer.

I just found the worst page in the entire dictionary... ...What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous.

My wife made me dinner the other day. She got offended when I put down my knife and fork and said, "This dinner is disgusting" then my wife said, "Well, boil your own toast next time then"

Men want only one thing and it's disgusting.... Women want only 2,337 things and it's exhausting.

Is he sleazy? Yes. Is he disgusting? Absolutely. Did he act in a vulgar manner towards women? Certainly. But he's not running for President, his wife is.

Our country needs a border wall. South of the border is nothing but criminals, disgusting people, and entitled people and their government does nothing about it. Just to be clear, I live in Canada.

Last Christmas we bought a fake Christmas tree The guy behind the counter said "Are you going to put it up yourself?" My dad said, "Don't be disgusting. I'm going to put it in the living room."

Children are like farts. You don't mind your own but other people's are disgusting.

People say cannibals are disgusting human beings But this one tastes pretty good

A vegan told me that people who eat meat are disgusting I said, 'people who sell fruits and vegetables are grocer.'

The guy was in the store buying a fake Christmas tree. The shop attendant asked him, "Are you going to put that tree up yourself?" The guy replied, "Don't be disgusting! I'm going to put it in the living
room!"

Lance Armstrong I think it is just terrible and disgusting how everyone has treated Lance Armstrong. Especially after what he achieved, winning 7 Tour de France races while on drugs. When I was on drugs, I couldn't even find my bike

I like to sleep completely naked I don't know why is it disgusting to some people. Dude, you can just take another bus.

I was sitting on the toilet when the guy in the stall next to me started smoking. It was so disgusting I nearly couldn't finish my sandwich.

It's pretty disgusting how celebrity parents name their children after cooked rodent. Poor Chris Pratt

Age old debate. People these days always talk about how disgusting butchers and people who sell meat are, however I've found that people who sell fruits and vegetables are grocer.

I hate people who finds it disgusting when i breastfeed in public .. It's completely normal and strenghtens the bond between me and my dog.

Knock knock. Who's there?

I eat map.

I eat map who?

That's disgusting.

Stop making jokes about how fat and disgusting Amy Schumer is. You're stealing her material.

I wrote the most disgusting joke ever. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Why don't mother vampires nurse their infants?

Because the only bleed once a month.

This vegan kept trying to tell me that people who sell meat are disgusting. I told him, “people who sell fruits and vegetables are grocer.”

Jokes about vaginas are disgusting... Period.

A man buys a Christmas tree. As he goes to pay for the tree, the attendant says, "Are you putting the tree up yourself?"

The man replies, "Quit being disgusting. I'm putting the tree in my living room."

A man was picking out a Christmas tree A man was picking out a Christmas tree.

When he goes to pay for it, the cashier asks him, "Will you be putting this up yourself?"

The man replies, "Quit being disgusting! I'm putting it in my living room."

I recently bought a Christmas tree at a shop... The man at the cashier said to me "Are you going to put that up yourself?"

I replied to him in disgust saying "No, that is disgusting! I'm going to put it up in my living room."

Talking to a vegan today I was talking to a vegan today and they said : "I think butchers or anyone who sells meat is disgusting ! " to which I replied "well I think people who sell fruit and veg are grocer"

On the way back home from the pool with the wife and kids Wife: I can't believe you did something that disgusting.

Me: oh, come on. Everyone pees in the pool

Wife: NOT FROM THE DIVING BOARD!

My kids favorite Knock Knock joke. Knock knock!

Who's there?

Mommy just ate up!

Mommy just ate up who?

That's disgusting! Why would you say that about your mother!!

A vegan told me people who sold meat were disgusting. I said people who sell fruit and veg are grocer.

There's nothing like waking up next to the girl of your dreams on a nice Sunday knowing you could just lay in bed with her all day long Her calling the cops and saying 'get out my bed you disgusting freak' does ruin the mood though.

I got home the other day and my dad was on the floor having a stroke. I told him that's disgusting and to do that in private from now on.

Vegans are disgusting They always go grass to mouth