Donkey Jokes

Contents

Funniest Donkey Jokes

A man with a stutter... A man with a stutter is visiting the doctor.

"How's the stutter?", asks the doctor.

"It's g-getting better. My mate calls me D-Donkey," replies the man.

"Any idea why?" The doctor asks.

"No, but he aw he aw he aw he always calls me that."

Score: 310
Funny Donkey Jokes
Score: 168

What do you get when you inject human DNA into a donkey? Kicked out of the petting zoo :(

Score: 161

Why does Donkey Kong brush his teeth? To prevent tooth DK.

Score: 160

What do Bruce Lee and the Donkey from Shrek have in common? They have both entered the dragon.

Score: 124

What do you call it when Donkey Kong gets a cavity? Tooth DK.

Score: 104

What do you call it when you kill an important donkey? An Assassassination.

I made it up when I was seven and to this day its the only thing I've ever made up that resembles a joke.

Score: 73

Why was Donkey Kongs corpse smelling? It was beginning to DK

Score: 63

I like my women like I like my coffee. Wrapped in a burlap sack and hauled across the border on a donkey by Juan Valdez.

Score: 60

Why did Donkey Kong go to the dentist? He had tooth DK

Score: 51

What do you get if you put human DNA in a donkey? Banned from the zoo.

Score: 49

I once had a job interview at a blacksmiths The owner asked if I'm any good at shoeing horses.

I said "I'm not sure, but I once told a donkey to go away!!!"

Score: 26

Why Donkey Kong always brushes his teeth? To prevent tooth DK.

Score: 23

When a donkey is angry in traffic, what does he do? He honks

Score: 14

[WARNING OC!] What does a Mexican carpet fitter say to his donkey when he's late? "Underlay Underlay Underlay!"

Score: 12

What do you call a group of British gentlemen who have misplaced their donkey? Assless Chaps

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My coworker used to tell me this one.

Score: 12

What happens when a man loses his train of thought? So then I said, put that donkey down!

Score: 11

I like my men like I like my coffee Tied up on the back of a donkey, led by a Columbian.

Score: 10

I like my women how i like my Coffee, in a burlap sack on the back of a donkey.

Score: 9

A blacksmith asked me if I’d ever shoed a horse. I said ... “No. But I’ve told a donkey to f*** off!”

Score: 9

What do you call a donkey with three legs? A wonkey.

Score: 8

I noticed that he called her 'donkey' all night, I asked why and she said....... HEEE-AWWW, HEE-AWWW, HEEEE-AAAALWAYS CALLS ME THAT!

Score: 7

I like my women like I like my coffee Tied up in a sack and thrown on the back of a donkey!

Score: 7

My friend and I were a donkey for Halloween... We just half-assed our costumes.

Score: 6

A horse came into a bar. No wait..... It was a donkey
.A horse came into a donkey.

Score: 6

What happens when you kill Donkey Kong? He starts to DK.

Score: 6

What do you get when you cross a human with a donkey? Banned from the petting zoo

Score: 5

How does a Donkey make its living? Eeyores himself out.

Score: 5

What do you call it when Donkey Kong gets a tooth cavity? Tooth DK

Score: 5

What do you call a donkey with 3 legs A wonkey

Score: 5

Who is the most famous donkey in history? Donkey-ottie

Score: 3

A donkey walks into a bar.... A donkey walks into a bar.
"Where's the horse?" asks the barman.
"Recession," says the donkey.

Score: 3

My wife gave me a mouse and a keyboard for my birthday. I learned to play "KLONKY DONKEY" on the keyboard and trained that little fella to dance.

Score: 3

bowler hat on a donkey Do you know why it's not recommended to put a bowler hat on a donkey?
Because no one likes a smartass...

Score: 2

If I ever get a donkey I'm going to name it Hoatie so it will be named after someone famous... This way I can call it Donkey Hoatie

Score: 2

What do you call a colonoscopy on a donkey? An assassin.

Score: 2

What do you call a donkey in space An ASStronaut.

Score: 2

When is a donkey spelled with one letter? When it's U!

Score: 2

What do you get when you cross a monkey and donkey? Beaten by two angry animals

Score: 1

A Jew and a donkey walk into a bar Punchline is same as joke #267

Score: 1

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New Donkey Jokes

One day I was walking when I saw a man on a motorcycle. Suddenly a donkey came up kicked the man off the motorcycle, got on the motorcycle and then drove it away. And I thought to myself, “That’s badass“.

Score: 1

What do you call a Caucasian mule? You guessed it, a honky donkey...

Score: 1

I saw a woman crying the other day. I said "What's the matter?" She says "My bf called me a donkey." I said "Well that's not worth crying over." And she said "But heehawwways says it."

Score: 1

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