Hilarious Happiness Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Happiness Jokes

Today I donated my watch, phone, and $500 to a poor guy. You can’t imagine the happiness I felt as I saw him put his pistol back in his pocket.

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Happiness is like peeing in your pants Everyone can see it, but only you can feel the warmth

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Today I donated a laptop, a smartphone and $500 to a poor guy. Can't express the happiness I got when I saw him putting the knife back in his pocket

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The real meaning of happiness Today I donated a watch, a phone and $500 to a poor guy.You can't know the happiness I felt as I saw him put his knife back in his pocket.

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For anyone who says "money cant buy you happiness" You obviously have never paid for a divorce.

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I didn't know what happiness was until I got married. But by then it was too late.

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Anyone that says money can't buy happiness.... Has never been divorced

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What starts with M, ends with E and can bring two people eternal happiness? Me, I'm a divorce lawyer

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Today i donated a Watch, a Phone and $500 to a poor guy. You can't know the happiness I felt as I saw him put his knife back in his pocket.

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Happiness is like peeing your pants Everyone else can see it, but only you can feel the warmth.

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I'm not one to brag about my financial skills, but my credit card company calls me almost every day to tell me my balance is outstanding.

~ Rob DenBleyker (Cyanide & Happiness)

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Today I donated my watch, my phone and $500 to a poor guy. You don't know the happiness I felt as I saw him put his knife back in his pocket.

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I gave a phone and 100 dollars to a homeless guy today. You will never know the happiness I've felt when he put his gun away.

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Today I donated a watch... Today I donated a watch and $500 dollars to a poor guy. You don't know the happiness I felt as I saw him put back his knife in his pocket.

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I donated my phone and my watch today and you can't imagine the happiness I felt as I saw him putting his gun back into his pocket

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Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late."

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Yesterday i've donated my purse,watch and cellphone to a poor guy. You Can't imagine the happiness that I felt as i saw him putting his gun back in his pocket

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(My only Valentines day related joke) If the Swan symbolizes happiness, what bird symbolizes true love? The Swallow.

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Money can't buy happiness... Poverty can't buy *Anything*

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So this one time I offered some shrimp to this Jewish friend of mine... Me: This shrimp is great. Wanna try some?

Friend: Sorry, I'm Jewish.

Me: No, it's free!

*from a comic by Cyanide and Happiness*

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Been on a diet for two weeks Proud to say I have lost 14 days of happiness.

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Today I donated my watch Today I donated my watch, my phone and 500$. You don’t know the happiness I felt when he put his gun away.

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I gave money to a homeless person today! Today I donated my watch, phone, and $500 to a poor guy. You wouldn’t believe the happiness I felt as he slid the pistol back into his pocket.

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Proud of myself Yesterday I've donated my cellphone watch and wallet to a poor guy. You Can't imagine the happiness that I felt as i saw him putting his gun back in his pocket

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A child asks his father how to be happy. He replied, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married..." "...and then it was too late."

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Be wary about dating a female that pronounces the letter H silent Especially when she tells you that all she wants is happiness.

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Poor Guy Today I donated a watch, a phone and my wallet to a poor guy. You can't imagine the happiness I felt as I saw him putting his gun back in his pocket.

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Money can't buy happiness... ...but poverty can't buy anything!

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My parents were just telling me "You'll never know true happiness if you don't get married." Me: Yep You never know what you've got till it's gone.

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A child asks his mother why the bride wears white on her wedding day. His mother responds, "Because white represents happiness, and that's the happiest day of her life!" The child thinks for a while and then asks, "Then why does the groom wear black?"

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They say that happiness is the key to everything... So when I got locked out of my house, I smiled at the lock

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Having a good friend is just like peeing your pants. Everybody can see it but only you feel that warm sensation of happiness.

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Money can't buy happiness... but it makes a great down payment!
~My Grandpa

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"Money doesn't buy happiness." Clearly you've never been poor.

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"Happiness is just around the corner, too bad the world is round."

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Why is a cheeseburger better than eternal happiness? 1. Nothing is better than eternal happiness.
2. A cheeseburger is better than nothing.

QED

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Some cause happiness wherever they go!! Others, whenever they go.

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People say money is not the key to happiness But with enough money, you can have a key made.

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Every member of my family brings happiness to me. Some when they arrive, and others when they leave.

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New Happiness Jokes

The five secrets to happiness 1. Find a woman who can cook
2. Find a woman who can make you laugh
3. Find a woman who actually listens to you
4. Find a woman who's good i bed
5. Last but most importantly, make sure none of them find out about eachother

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Leading Scientists have rejected a controversial paper claiming elementary particle interactions can explain happiness. It's no laughing matter

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A little girl attending a wedding asked her mother why the bride wears white "Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life", says the mother.

"Oh", says the girl. "Is the groom *that* unhappy about the whole thing?"

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I guess Bull Cosby found his own key to happiness... A Flat Minor.

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Today, I donate a watch, a phone and a wallet to a poor guy today. You can imagine the happiness I felt when he put away his gun.

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Son asks his Dad if he can throw baseball with him. The Dad takes the ball and says, "I'll pitch the ball."

The son runs out onto the field, full of happiness and excitement.

The Dad drops the baseball in the trash and walks away.

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If the swan is the symbol of happiness, then what bird symbolizes true love? Answer:
The Swallow

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Can anyone name three Kings that brought happiness and peace to earth? Drin-king, smo-king, and fuc-king!

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You can't understand the meaning of True Happiness until you get Married ... but then it's too late

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They say money can't buy happiness… But tell me, have you ever seen a sad man in a Ferrari?

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"Money doesn't buy happiness!" said the man who didn't know how to shop.

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If Happiness was as easy to invoke as Hate..... I probably wouldn't have crippling depression right now.

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Today I donated my watch, phone and $500 to a poor guy You don't know the happiness I felt as I saw him put his knife back in his pocket

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Happiness is like peeing in your pants ...everyone can see it, but only you can feel its warmth.

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