Hilarious I Like My Women Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest I Like My Women Jokes

I like my women like I like my whiskey. 12 years old and mixed up with coke.

Disclaimer: This is just a joke, i do not condone the practice of mixing whiskey with coke.

Score: 16297

I like my women like I like my slaves Educated and free.

Score: 15614

I like my women like i like my computer Turned on
On my lap
Virus free

Score: 5299

I like my women like I like my mathematical constants. Round and irrational.

Happy Pi Day everyone!

Score: 3112

I like my women how I like my computer. On my lap.
Turned on.
Virus free.

Score: 2410

I like my women like I like my microwave Hot, clean, and she'll kill any baby I put inside her.

Score: 1950

I like my coffee like I like my women Purchased cheaply after having been raised in exploitative conditions.

Edit: wow, front page with an "I like my coffee like I like my women" joke. You should all be ashamed of yourselves!

Score: 1516

I like my women like I like my microwaves... Cold on the outside, warm on the inside, and willing and able to kill any baby I put inside them.

Score: 927

I like my women like I like my toasters, Turned on, and in the tub with me

Score: 783

I like my women like I like my coffee I've never had coffee but it smells really nice

Score: 727

I like my women like I like my computer Turned on
On my lap
And virus free

Score: 602

I like my women like I like my wine 12 years old and locked in the basement

Edit:I like most things without dicks aswell

Score: 546

I like my pizza like I like my women Absolutely no pubic hair.

Score: 366

I like my women how I like my bicycles, chained up in the garage.

Score: 359

I like my women like I like my cigars 7 years old and coming from Cuba in a burlap sack

Score: 357

I like my women like I like my coffee. Thrown into a burlap sack and transported illegally across Central America.

Score: 326

I like my women like I like my coffee. I have a deep respect for coffee and would never discriminate against coffee based on its gender.

Score: 300

I like my women like I like my golf scores In the mid 70's with a slight handicap

Score: 276

I like my women like I like my wine... Twelve years old and in the cellar.

Score: 257

I like my women like I like my coffee. From a third world country and at a reasonable price.

Score: 254

I like my women like I like my golf score Mid eighties and with slight handicap.

Score: 193

I like my women like I like my coffee... ...all over my crotch when I'm driving.

Score: 191

I like my wine how I like my women 15 years old and locked in a basement

Score: 183

I like my coffee how I like my women Imported from poor South American countries.

Score: 168

I like my women like i like my toasters Turned on and in the bath tub win me

Score: 168

I like my women like I like my marijuana... Chopped into tiny pieces and burned to ashes without the police ever finding out.

Score: 167

I like my women like I like my wine. 10 years old and in the cellar.

Score: 164

I like my women like I like my tea. In a bag, underwater.

Score: 150

I like my women how I like my light bulbs... Not too bright, easy to turn on and hanging from electrical wire in my basement.

Score: 136

I like my women like I like my ramen noodles Hot, cheap, and Asian

Score: 135

I like my women like I like my coffee Absolutely no pubes

Score: 124

I like my women like I like my coffee... Ground up in my freezer.

Score: 124

I like my women like I like my cigars... 7 years old and in a burlap sack from Cuba

Score: 103

I like my women like how I like my wine. 10 years old and locked in the cellar.

Score: 80

I like my women like my computers At least old enough to handle my 3 1/2-inch floppy.

Score: 68

I like my women like I like my golf game. Mid 80's with a slight handicap

Score: 66

I like my women like I like my coffee. Wrapped in a burlap sack and hauled across the border on a donkey by Juan Valdez.

Score: 60

I like my women how I like my wine 100 years old and locked in a cellar.

Score: 56

I like my women like I like my computer data, with the ability to back it up.

Score: 45

I like my books like I like my women Thin, interesting and good in bed.

Score: 39

New I Like My Women Jokes

I like my women like I like my tools Locked in my shed

Score: 6

I like my women how I like my snow Excited to see them but glad it's temporary

Score: 5

I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, covered in cream, and purchased from a large multinational corporation with a history of exploitation

Score: 18

I like my women the same way I like my cheese Mature

Score: 4

I like my women like i like my tea. Pale and weak.

Hilarious I know.

Score: 4

I like my women how I like my cigars Seven years old and in a burlap sack from India

Score: 4

I like my women like I like my bananas Bruised and in-bread

Score: 4

I like my women how I like my calculus: With limits.

Score: 12

I like my women like I like my hangovers Easy and gone in the morning

Score: 5

I like my women like I like my gpa Just a little above average

Score: 6

I like my women like I like my cheese Blue, a little below room temperature, and easy to slice

Score: 6

I like my women like I like my wine. Twelve years old and in my basement.

(Joke was told to me by my cousin)

Score: 9

I like my women like I like my guns..... Locked up in the basement

Score: 13

I like my women like I like my milk. 2% chocolate.

Score: 6

I like my women like I like my cars 21 years old and full of issues.

Score: 5

I like my women how I like the borders of my Excel cells With a thick bottom

Score: 10

I like my women how I like my coffee. I’ve never had coffee but it smells really nice.

Score: 11

I like my numbers like I like my women... My favourite number is seven.

Score: 4

I like my deli meat how I like my women Thin and shaved

Score: 14

I like my women like I like my pizza... Doesn't come in 30 minutes it's free.

Score: 4

I like my women like I like my coffee Rich, white, and creamy

Score: 13

I like my women how I like my whiskey... 18 years old and full of coke.

Score: 7

I like my women like I like my golf score Around 80 with a slight handicap

Score: 14

I like my women how I like my coffee Fair trade

Score: 4

I like my women like I like my roads.. ...straight and with no one else on them!

Score: 5

I like my women like I like my cheese Thick, white, and rich.

Score: 14

I like my women like I like my coffee Full of alcohol

Score: 16

I like my women how I like my coffee... Creamed.

Score: 8

I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot and always in my lap.

Score: 7

I like my women like I like my coffee Hot and all over my lap while driving.

Score: 7

I like my women the way I like Starbucks I just can't afford either

Score: 6

I like my women how I like my coffee... ...raised by impoverished farmers in Southeast Asia.

Score: 22

I like my women like I like my windows... 7, no XP.

Score: 5

I like my women like I like my apples... Rotten to the core and easy to smash

Score: 28

I like my women like I like my covfefe A mystery

Score: 25

I like my women how I like my chocolate... No nuts.

Score: 9

I like my women like I like my coffee Left in my car till its cold and gross...then dumped on the side of the road.

Score: 5

I like my women how I like my freezers.. Cold and empty inside.

Score: 13

I like my women like I like my Uranium-235 Self-destructive, toxic, and decaying on the inside

Score: 34

I like my women like I like my hot tubs So hot I can only stay in them for 30 seconds

Score: 9

I like my women like my laptop... On my lap, turned on, virus-free, and hot.

Score: 4

I like my women like I like my OJ... Black and in handcuffs.

Score: 9

I like my women like I like my countries... Developing

Score: 4

I like my women how I like my Earth Flat.

Score: 16

I like my women like my sunglasses. Sitting on my face.

Score: 7

I like my women like I like my diarrhea Brown, chunky, and on my face.

Score: 15

I like my coffee like I like my women. Black and straight from the plantation.

Score: 7

I like my women like I like my job Sometimes I have trouble holding it down, and it involves a lot of medication.

Btw: I work in the pharmaceutical industry

Score: 3

I like my women like I like my whiskey. I hate whiskey.

Score: 4

I like my women like I like my wine. In my basement and unaware they're being watched.

Score: 3

I like my whisky like I like my women Aged 12 years in a cellar.

Score: 16

I like my women like I like my jeep Topless and easy to get into.

Score: 7

I like my wine how I like my women Perfectly aged with a full body.

Score: 4

I like my women how I like my golf scores... Low 80's with a slight handicapp

Score: 5

I like my women as I like my pre-expansion universes So hot and dense that it violates the Pauli exclusion principle and demands a better understanding of the standard model

Score: 12

I like my coffee like i like my women... ...from a third world country and at a reasonable price!

Score: 31

I like my women how I like my computer Broken, dead, and in the basement.

Score: 3

I like my women like I like my wine... 18 years old and locked in my basement

Score: 5

I like my women like I like my flyers. Passed out

Score: 8

I like my classes like I like my women with curves

Score: 5