Purple Jokes

Contents

Funniest Purple Jokes

I just found out I'm colorblind The diagnosis came completely out of the purple.

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My least favorite color is purple. I hate it more than red and blue combined.

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I once dated a girl with a twin People ask me how I could tell them apart. It was simple, Jill colored her nails purple and bob had a cock

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Funny Purple Jokes
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Purple is my favorite color! I like it more than blue and red combined.

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I bought pink cotton but my wife wanted purple Sorry, wrong thread

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I was forced to swallow purple food color. I feel violated.

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I found out I was colourblind today It was totally out of the purple

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I was recently surprised to hear from the doctor that i was colour blind! It was so sudden! It came right out of the purple!

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breathe dammit, BREATHE!

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breathe damnit! BREATHE!!

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I recently found out that I'm colorblind... It came out of the purple.

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? BREATHE!!!

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What's the difference between pink and purple? Your grip.

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I found out I was colorblind last week... ...came right out of the purple.

Score: 170

I recently found out that I was colorblind... It came completely out of the purple.

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Just found out I'm colorblind. The diagnosis came completely out of the purple.

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? "BREATHE DAMMIT!!"

Score: 120

I learned today that I'm colorblind This was a surprise, it really came out of the purple

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What's both blue and purple and never seen again? This thread :/

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What's 9 inches long, purple, and I love to shove it down my girlfriend's throat? Her miscarriage.

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I was just diagnosed with colorblindness The result came completely out of the purple

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Blue Guy lives in the blue house, red guy lives in the red house, purple guy lives in the purple house, orange guy... Lives in the White House.

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My doctor just told me I'm colorblind. The diagnosis came completely out of the purple.

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I've just been diagnosed as Colorblind.. I know, it certainly has come out of the purple.

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What's the difference between pink and purple? Grip.

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breathe, idiot! BREATHE!

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Why do the Minnesota vikings wear purple as a team color? If you've been choking for 50 years, you'd be purple too!

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I just found out I’m colorblind The diagnosis came completely out of the purple

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Why are elephants big and grey? Because if they were small and purple, they would be called grapes.

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What's the difference between the color pink and the color purple? Your grip!

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I bought purple Jell-O mix and now I feel like a superhero. With grape powder comes great responsibility.

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I just found out I'm colorblind. I'm absolutely shocked! It came right out of the purple.

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I just found out i'm colorblind.. I'm shocked.. it totally came out of the purple

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What happens if u throw a purple hat in the black sea? It gets wet.

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Do you know what the difference between pink and purple is? Your grip.

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Just found out I'm colorblind... ... It came completely out of the purple.

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I just found out I’m colourblind... It came completely out of the purple.

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Just found out that I am color blind The diagnosis came completely out of the purple.

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Why did Purple hate Red? Because she left him feeling Blue

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New Purple Jokes

Dad jokes My least favourite colour is purple.

I hate it more then blue and red combined

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What did the police officer say to the perp holding a rotten, purple vegetable? Drop that funky beet!

What did the police officer say to the perp holding Allen Ginsberg?
Drop that funky beat!

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Roses are red, violets are purple, I’m schizophrenic, And so am I.

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I developed an operating system. Its quite bulky. It comes with a default purple background and icons in 6 different colours. Has limited servers, so only half the people of earth will get a chance to own it. Than OS.

Coming to your phones soon.

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A color blind person is feeling down He’s feeling a little purple

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Little Johnny does poetry. One day in English class, Little Johnny is asked to write a poem. He gets up in front of class and tells them "I've named this poem Old Lady's Underpants."

Rose's are red,
Violet's are blue,
Grandma's are purple.

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I was at an auction that tried to pass off a guitar as the one Prince wrote Purple Rain on. You could tell it was fake because Prince puts stars over his i's.

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I visited my eye doctor the other day for an eye test. Found out I was color blind, it was completely out of the purple. Devastated.

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I was diagnosed with color blindness just an hour ago. It came right out of the purple.

Edit: Dammit, I accidentally put a space between "color" and "blindness".

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breath stupid

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I just found out I'm colour blind I'm shocked, it totally came out of the purple.

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I've just found out I'm colour blind. I'm shocked. It totally came out of the purple.

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What do you call a brewmaster that wears a bright purple robe and carries around an enormous recipe book? An Ale Chemist.

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Who lives in which house? If a green man lives in a green house, a red man lives in a red house, and a purple man lives in a purple house, where does the orange man live?


The White House

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I have a dream of opening a business that sells purple pitted fruit as well as offering home water service repair I'll call it Plum and Plumber

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The purple man lives in the purple house. The green man lives in the green house. The blue man lives in the blue house. Who lives in the White House? The orange man.

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A Crayola truck just got robbed for profit We're currently searching for the purple traders

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My grandfather was telling me about his Purple Heart. I told him he should really see a doctor.

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Why do all Jewish guys have purple penises? Because they're all tight-fisted wankers!

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The color red walks over to the table where Blue and Purple are sitting "Sorry," says Blue, "you can't sit with us. You aren't cool enough."

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What's the difference in red and purple...? ... How hard you squeeze it.

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