Hilarious Soap Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Soap Jokes

Went to Jail for the first time and found out that what they say about dropping the soap is just a myth I held on to that soap for dear life and it turns out they rape you anyway

Score: 3526

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth Then it just becomes a soap opera.

Score: 856

Score: 650

My wife told me to kiss her like if we were in a soap opera I hugged her tight, kissed her with passion and then slapped her because how dare she?!

Score: 269

I was addicted to soap But i'm clean now

Score: 129

What is the best thing about liquid soap? It takes longer to pick up.

Score: 123

Let's hear some Confucius Jokes I'll start

Confucius says woman that keeps soap on top shelf will jump for joy.

Score: 97

Addicted Three years ago I got addicted to soap.

But now I'm clean.

Score: 95

i was addicted to soap for a while... i'm clean now

Score: 95

If a deaf kid swears in sign language, does his mom wash his hands with soap?

Score: 92

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth then it becomes a soap opera

Score: 89

What's the difference between soap and my group project partner? Soap works.

Score: 87

What's the difference between a Nun in Church and a Nun in the bath One has Hope in her Soul the other has Soap in her Hole.

Score: 68

I used to be addicted to soap But I am clean now

Score: 60

What's the difference between a girl that's praying and a girl that's having a bubble bath? One has hope in her soul,
The other has soap in her hole.

Score: 56

Whats the difference between a woman in church and a woman in the bathtub? One has hope in her soul, the other has soap in her hole.

Score: 51

I used to be addicted to soap... It's okay I'm clean now.

Score: 50

I used to be addicted to soap. I'm clean now.

Score: 49

I used to be addicted to soap... but I'm clean now.

Score: 46

Why does the U.S. Navy use powdered soap? It takes longer to pick up.

Score: 37

What's the difference between Dish soap and Lube? The first one splits the greases, the second one greases the split.

Score: 36

What do you call a sad singer in a bath tub.... A soap opera...

(My first joke)

Score: 35

I became addicted to soap about 3 years back don't worry, I'm clean now..

Score: 35

Had a friend that was addicted to soap... It’s ok. He’s clean now.

Score: 35

Whats the difference between a girl in a church and a girl in a bath tub. One has hope in her soul, while the other has soap in her hole.

Score: 31

I'm addicted to Soap But I'm clean now

Score: 30

I use to be addicted to soap I'm clean now

Score: 28

I hope I don't go to prison after what I did today. When I was in the shower I dropped the soap like ten times.

Score: 28

If you ever find yourself in prison, don't drop the soap. It's full of criminals and you may not get it back.

Score: 27

Why dose the navy use liquid soap? Because it takes longer to pick up.

Score: 26

Two kangaroos are in the bathtub. cuz why not One kangaroo says, "Pass the soap."
The other kangaroo says, "No soap...radio!"

Score: 21

I had an addiction to soap But I'm clean now.

Score: 11

Two years ago I became addicted to soap Thankfully I'm clean now

Score: 10

I was addicted to soap... but now I'm clean.

Score: 10

One hundred bacteria walk into a bar... of soap and get eradicated. There is only one survivor.

Score: 9

I used to be addicted to soap.. Luckily I'm all clean now.

Score: 9

I had a soap addiction. Its okay though I'm clean now.

Score: 8

Why do they use powdered soap in the navy? Because it takes longer to pick up.

Score: 8

I went to the doctor for a rash... Doctor: What toiletries are you using?

Me: Steven’s soap, Steven’s shampoo, Steven’s toothpaste and Steven’s toothbrush.

Doctor: Huh, so is Steven’s a foreign brand?

Me: No, Steven is my roommate.

Score: 5

what do apples, dish washer soap, the muppets, a black guy, beer, yankee candels, and the keyboard on a flip phone all have in common? they all help make a really convoluted joke.

Score: 4

New Soap Jokes

I used to be addicted to drinking liquid soap But now I'm clean

Score: 1

A student, who is not a native English speaker was buying He was confused when he saw the words "open here" on a box of laundry soap, so he asked the store clerk,
"Can't I wait until I get home to open it?"

Score: 0

What's the difference between a woman in church and a woman in bath One has her soul full of hope, the other has her hole full of soap

Score: 1

All these posts about being addicted to soap and getting clean... No one talks about the constipation.

Score: 2

What's the difference between a woman praying and a woman bathing? A woman praying has hope in her soul,
A woman bathing has soap in her hole.

Score: 2

Which bath time toy steals your soap? The Robber Ducky

Score: 3

Whats the difference between a jew and a bar of soap? A bar of soap can last 40 minutes in the shower.

Score: 2

Dad : son, go get me some laundry soap. Son : do u really need it now?

Dad : yes, you can say it's det-urgent!

Score: 3

What are two places you never want to drop the soap? Penn State or the State Pen.

Score: 4

A soap bar was trying to console another soap bar Soap1- *crying uncontrollably*

Soap2- Stop crying, I know you're acting

Soap1- it's the glycerin

Score: 2

I used to be addicted to soap... Don't worry I'm clean now.

Score: 2

Two nuns are in the bathtub One nun says: "Where's the soap?"
The other says: "It does, doesn't it?"

Score: 1

What do you call rampant inflation in a prison's microenconomy? A soap bubble

Score: 2

1st day in prison, was a bit scared, but the guys have said I can have a job already Apparently I pick up bars of soap in the shower, I start tomorrow, wish me luck.

Score: 4

I heard soap is quite flavourless After all the substance is quite basic

Score: 2

Why did the shampoo have trust issues? Because the soap was a lye.

Score: 1

What do you get if you eat soap? Shampoo!

Score: 3

CBS just greenlit a new soap opera centered around stoners they're calling it "Mellow Drama".

Score: 1

What's Sigmund Freud's favorite soap opera? The Jung and the Restless

Score: 2

So the boxing kangaroo says to the microwave... "No soap radio!"

Score: 1