Thanos Jokes

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Funniest Thanos Jokes

Thanos’ finger snap would have a way greater impact if they found a way to make it seem like half the audience disappeared Apparently only DC movies can do that

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Marvel's greatest villain is Thanos. DC's greatest villain is Rotten Tomatoes.

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Funny Thanos Jokes
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Thanos goes to his urologist. The urologist says, "Congrats Thanos, you now also have the kidney stone"

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Your momma's so fat Thanos had to clap

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What is Thanos favourite social media? Obviously Snapchat

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Whoever spoils End Game... Whoever spoils End Game deserves to die like Black Widow, Iron Man, and Thanos.

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Your momma so fat It's been four weeks since Thanos snapped his fingers and she's still disintegrating.

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Yo mama so fat... Thanos had to snap twice.

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Yo Momma so fat (Avengers Edition) Yo Momma so fat it took Thanos 2 Snaps to destroy her.

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I'm not allowed to dress up as a superhero and visit the children's hospital anymore. And I put so much work into my Thanos costume.

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What is Thanos' favourite game? Half-Life.

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What is Thanos' favorite video game? Half-Life.

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What's Thanos' favorite drink? Snapple

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Why does Thanos love Snapchat? It fits his personality like a glove.

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Why was OJ Simpson turned down for the role of Thanos? The glove didn’t fit.

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After saving the universe from Thanos, Thor spent the night with a beautiful woman. The next morning, Thor says, "Fair maiden, I must confess: I am Thor."

She replies, "*You're* Thor? I can hardly walk."

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What is Thanos' favourite video game? Half life

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What’s thanos’s favorite social media platform? Snapchat

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Your mama so fat... ##Thanos had to clap

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What’s Thanos’ favorite drink? Snapple

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What’s Thanos’s favorite video game? Half life

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Thanos would make a great accountant The books would always be balanced.

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Brilliant idea for a start-up Imma build a new operating system which, when the disk gets full, randomly deletes half your files.

Gonna call it thanOS.

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How can Thanos speak english? The rosetta stone

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Why is there always dust at the bottom of a bag of cereal? It's a sign Thanos has ensured you get a "balanced" breakfast.

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(Infinity War Speculation) When Thanos gains the mind stone, he will turn into Palpatine. Because The Avengers will pay for their lack of Vision.

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Wouldn't it be cool if when Thanos snapped half of the audience dissapeared. Too bad only DC movies can do that.

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Why wasn't Thanos picked for jury duty? Because he makes snappy judgements!

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Yo mamma so fat That Thanos had to clap

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Everyone thinks Antman will be the one to kill Thanos Personally, I think he will play a small part in Endgame

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What's Thanos' favourite app? Snapchat.

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Why did Thanos tell everyone to smell his finger? He was feeling Strange.

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What is Thanos' preferred social media? Snapchat

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What’s the most offensive marketing campaign post-Thanos Snap? 50% off.

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How does Thanos make a snapping noise with the infinity gaunlet? When he snaps his cheeks clap.

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What's thanos's favourite app? Snapchat

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What's Thanos's Favorite Veggie? Sugar SNAP peas!!!!!!

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Tony Stark fulfilled his duties as a father by cracking the ultimate dad joke before dying. Thanos: I’m inevitable. . Tony: Hi Inevitable, I’m Iron Man.

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What did Thanos say when his plan didn't work? Oh snap!

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New Thanos Jokes

Guy That Thanos Snapped: So... what happened to pregnant women and their babies? Guy That Didn't Get Snapped: Let's just say I never want to see a pepper shaker ever again.

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Everyone in the Marvel universe would have disappeared... If Thanos was an Addams Family fan.

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Only Avengers will get it... What's Thanos' favourite car?
Dacia Duster

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The Avengers and Thanos walk into a bar... Walks into a bar

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