Writer Jokes

I told my old classmate at our 10-year reunion that I'm a writer. "Oh yeah?" he asks. "Have you sold anything yet?" I said, "Sure. My house, my car, and all my stuff."

What does the narcissistic cow say? "Meeeeee!"

I wrote this.
I'm now a comedy writer.
You are welcome.

What did Melania Trump say to her speech writer? Thanks, Obama.

A BuzzFeed writer walks into a bar... 95% of americans were shocked to find out what happened next.

What did the writer say when he glued himself to his book? That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

I realize the writer of the Iliad and the Odyssey was better than me every time I enter my house I am home, but he was Homer.

Did you hear about the writer that became a tailor? He had to make an Ernest living, the Hemingway.

Common synonyms of unemployed. Writer, blogger, and activist.

A Buzzfeed writer walked into a bar... You won’t BELIEVE what they asked for!

How does a Buzzfeed writer catch fish? Clickbait.

Not the best joke, but i did make it up myself. Q: Why can you not hook two CD-ROM drives together to create a CD Writer?

A: Because two ROMs don't make a Write.

Being a writer is enjoyable... But the job of editor is more rewording.

My writer's block makes me want to kill myself And I would, but I dont know how to start the suicide note.

How did the editor fix the writer's article about appreciation for a certain valuable mineral? Edit: Thanks for the gold

I electrified the toilet of a clickbait writer No. 1 will shock him.

Being a writer keeps me in great physical shape I'm always running out of ideas.

Charles Dickens had writer's block… He had a contract due for a new novel, but he hadn't even thought of a title yet. He went into the local pub and asked the barman for a Martini.

"Olive, or twist?"

A lady comes to a writer house - Hey, how's your book writing going?

- Really well, I'm up to page 69.

- Wow, what're you writing?

- Page numbers

A buzzfeed writer and a terrorist walked into a bar What happened next will blow your mind!

What do you call a writer who feels like they've been born in the wrong body Transcribe

Subscribe (Verb) - to obtain or have a subscription to a publication, concert series, service, etc. Subscribe (Noun) - a very obedient writer

What does the writer suffer from each spring? A case of allegories

What's it like to be an aspiring writer? It's difficult to put into words.

The mining industry wants to put out a radio advert to help with recruitment. They hire a jingle writer, and he asks them what key he should write it in. They said: "B minor".

Just heard Barrack Obama's main writer has been killed.. Sources reporting that he is currently speechless.

So a cinematographer, writer, and production designer walk into a bar.... and the director takes all the credit.

Did you know lotr could have come out a lot earlier? Only problem was no one knew what the writer was Tolkien about

What do you call a neighbourhood full of idle novelists? Writer's block.

My friend from Prague is a writer. He likes to use Spellczech.

What's the best college degree to become a successful fiction writer? Journalism!

What happens when a Buzzfeed writer becomes an electrician with no experience? What comes next will shock you

I'm a writer My pen name is Bic

Did you hear about the writer who was sitting under the big statue of the cross in Rio de Janeiro, working on his screenplay, when a gang beat him up and stole his laptop? Another victim of a cross site scripting attack.

What do you call it when a writer hangs himself off the side of the mountain? A cliffhanger.

I told my friend that I quit my job to become a writer. He said, "Take your life seriously."


I told him that writing is my passion and I'm quite serious about it.


Then he said "No dude, take your life, seriously.."

What do you call a well slept, well fed writer? Content writer

What do communism and a essay writer who plays no sport have in common? They work on paper, but not in practice.

What position did the writer play in soccer? Foreword

A short poem entitled "The Imagination of a Writer" Negligible.