Hilarious Barber Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Barber Jokes

Wow. The neighborhood barber just got arrested for dealing drugs. I've been his customer for years. I had no idea he was a barber.

Score: 5938

Just found out the local barber has been arrested for selling drugs. I've been a customer of his for 15 years and I didn't even know he cut hair.

Score: 4312

My neighborhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs.. I've been his customer for 6 years. I had no idea he was a barber

Score: 2631

A local barber was arrested for selling drugs. I've been his customer for 5 years I never knew he was a barber

Score: 1833

The neighborhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs... We had been his customers for 8 years. We had no idea he was a barber.

Score: 1170

My local barber got arrested for selling cocaine. This surprised me, since I have been a customer of him for years now, and i'd never known... ...that he was a barber.

Score: 641

My local barber was arrested for selling drugs! I was his customer for years! Never knew he was a barber

Score: 619

Score: 523

Who shaves every hour everyday and still has a beard? The barber

Score: 494

Who can shave 25 times a day and still have a beard? A barber.

Score: 395

A barber was arrested yesterday in my area for selling drugs. I've been his customer for years. Didn't even know he was a barber...

Score: 365

Not everyone can brag about getting a handjob from their barber after a haircut... But then again, not everyone cuts their own hair.

Score: 338

A local barber in my area just got arrested for selling drugs. It blew my mind because I've been his customer for years! I had NO IDEA he was a barber!

Score: 331

A barber got arrested.. A barber got arrested in my area for dealing drugs and I’m totally shook. I’ve been his customer for years and never knew he was a barber.

Score: 281

A barber in my area just got arrested for selling drugs. Blew my mind. I've been his customer for years. I had no idea he was a barber

Score: 226

I used to know a guy who shaved around six or seven times a day and still had a beard at the end of the day He was a Barber.

Score: 160

What do you call a German barber? Herr Kutz

(This was funnier when I was half asleep this morning)

Score: 89

Yesterday a barber in my area was arrested for selling drugs. I've been his customer for years And I didn't even know he was a barber.

Score: 85

A local barber was just arrested for selling drugs. As a long time customer, I was very surprised I had no idea he was a barber

Score: 84

A man walks into a psychic barber shop Barber: say no more

Score: 77

I decided to switch to a new barber My current barber just isn't cutting it.

Score: 73

What do you call someone who has to shave 30 times a day? A barber

Score: 70

Did you hear about that German barber? You know, Herr Kutz.

Score: 56

A barber in my town just got arrested for dealing drugs and I've been his customer for years... I had no idea he was a barber.

Score: 50

What do you call a barber that only works on bald people? An air stylist.

Score: 43

Our neighbourhood barber got arrested for selling drugs after we had been his customer for 5 years. We had no idea he was a barber

Score: 42

I just ran into my barber on the street. He asked me how I liked the haircut he gave me last week. I told him it's growing on me.

Score: 38

Very few people can brag about getting a handjob from their barber after a haircut nowadays. Then again, very few people cut their own hair.

Score: 38

My local barber got arrested for drugs. I've been going to him for years. I never knew he was a barber.

Score: 38

The Barbershop So the other day I walked into a barbershop,

The barber came up to me and asked," Hey how can I help you sir??"

I told him that, " I just need a short cut" as I walked across his store and

right out through the backdoor

Score: 37

Barber in my town was arrested for dealing drugs... Shame, was his customer for years, never knew he cut hair.

Score: 26

What did the impatient barber say to his customer? I think we need to cut this short

Score: 21

A barber in my area was arrested yesterday for selling drugs... I've been his customer for years, and i didn't even know he was a barber!

Score: 20

A man asked a woman how often she shaved... She told him, "About 15-20 times a day."

He asked her, "What's wrong with you!?!"

She told him, "I'm a barber."

Score: 19

A local barber in my area just got arrested for selling drugs... I'm still baffled, I've been his customer for years and never knew he was a barber.

Score: 14

Who shaves many times a day but still has a beard? The barber.

Score: 13

A local barber got arrested in my area got arrested for selling drugs. Blew my mind. I've been his customer for years I had no idea he was barber.

Score: 10

A local barber in my area just got arrested for selling drugs. Blew my mind. I've been his customer for years. I had no idea he was a barber.

Score: 8

What was the name of the online barber? E-Clips

.... Couldn't resist

Score: 7

What do my barber and the doctor who did my circumcision have in common? They both took too much off the top

Score: 6

New Barber Jokes

Went into the barbers, I said “I want you to cut my hair like David Beckhams”. He cut my hair and I looked in the mirror!

“David Beckham doesn't have his hair cut like that!!??”

Barber says; “He does if he comes in here!!!”

Score: 4

What do you get when the hair saloons open after lockdown? Barber Q

Score: 0

My local barber just got arrested for dealing drugs. Funny, I’ve gone to him for 7 years and I never knew he was a barber.

Score: 1

A man forgets his wallet and can’t pay the hair dresser The man said that he would leave his wife at the barber as callaterol.

The hairdresser never saw the money

Score: 1

A rabbit walks into a barbers shop and asks for a haircut... The barber says, "I can't help you with that my friend, but the butcher across the street sure can."

Score: 2

When my local barber got arrested for dealing drugs, I was shocked. I’d been a customer for years and had know idea he was a barber.

Score: 2

I just saw in the local paper "Barber busted for dealing drugs" and I was amazed. I've been a customer of his for years and I had no idea he cut hair.

Score: 5

Local Barber shop owner busted for selling weed... I had no idea he was a barber.

Score: 2

Lady came into the barber's and said what cut what look best on me? Barber responds, a powercut

Score: 3

A vegetarian walks into a barber shop I would tell you the rest but it’s too quorny.

Score: 1

My barber died just yesterday. It's really messed up... ... I mean, who's going to cut my hair for the funeral?

Score: 2

Bruce Jenner walked into a barber shop... ...looking for a friend.
He asks the barber "Bob Peters here?"

The barber says, "Nope. Just cut hair."

Score: 2

Our local barber just got arrested today Apparently he's a drug dealer, which is really weird because I've been his client for 7 years and never knew he was a barber.

Score: 3

I went to get my haircut and told the barber not to take too much off. He only took off his trousers.

Score: 5

My girlfriend is at the barber. She is dying to get a new hair color.

Score: 4

My buddy told me he owns a straight-hair-only barber shop. Its name is, "No Curls Allowed."

Score: 1

How did the puppy pay his barber? With a defurred payment

Score: 1

Our local barber just got arrested for selling drugs. I've been his customer for 3 years now. I had no idea he was a barber.

Score: 6

What did King Louis XVI ask of his barber? "A little off the top please"

Score: 2

What's the difference between an Italian barber and an angry circus ringmaster? Ones a shaving roman and the others a raving showman.

Score: 2

Meanwhile In California.... Meanwhile In California, a local barber in my area just got arrested for selling drugs. Blew my mind, I've been his customer for years. No idea he was a barber.

Score: 1

Our neighborhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs We've been his customers for 6 years. We had no idea he was a barber.

Score: 4

My barber was telling me about how he was going to disinherit his son... Yeah, it was quite the heir cut.

Score: 6

A barber in my hometown just got busted for selling drugs. It blew my mind.. I had no idea that he was a barber.

Score: 3

Did you hear about the local barber? He liked killing people with his blades during the summer festival.
They called him the buzzkill.

Score: 4

A bald man walked into a barber shop As he entered, he thought to himself "What am I doing hair?"

Score: 1

Why did the dutch barber open a bank? So people could open a shaving account!

Score: 1

Barber: how would you like your hair cut? Customer: in silence

Score: 3

How does the barber trim the Moon's hair? Eclipse it.

Score: 1

What's a Spanish Barber's favorite Italian dish? Peine Pasta

Score: 1

A man walks into a barbershop and says, do you cut pubic hair? The Barber, a little taken back, says, "well, sure, why not?"

The man bares his teeth and says, "Great. Can you get this one?"

Score: 1

When is a barber a butcher? When he gives you muttonchops.

Score: 1

What did Bernie Sanders say to his barber? Just remove the top 1% please.

Score: 2

I decided to open a barber shop for little people. It will be called Shortcuts.

Score: 4

What did the hair stylist do when the Beach Boys came on? The barber ran

Score: 6

Got a free haircut and handjob from my barber today. Gotta love cutting your own hair.

Score: 3