Cakes Jokes

What do you get if you eat 3.14 cakes? Fat. You get fat.


What? Like I would make a pie joke on my cake day?

A man walks into a bakery with a salmon under his arm and says “do you have fish cakes?” The chap behind the counter replies, “No”.
“That’s a pity, it’s his birthday”.

(It’s a cake day joke—-ugh I’ll see myself out)

A man walks into a seafood shop carrying a trout under his arm. "do you make fish cakes?"
"Yes we do" replies the fishmonger...
"Great" says the man, ït's his birthday"

Fish Cakes A guy walks into a bar with a Salmon under his arm and says, "Do you sell fish cakes here?"

Bartender: No we don't.

Guy: That's a shame... it's his birthday.

What happens if you eat 3.14159265359 cakes? Fat. You get fat.

The Queen hosts a garden party in Scotland. The Scottish waiter arrives carrying a tray with many cakes on it. Queen asks, “Is that a scone, or a meringue?”

The waiter replies: “Naw, yer quite right, that’s a scone.”

Why do hockey players always make terrible birthday cakes? Because icing is not allowed.

A guy walks into a seafood store carrying a crab, and he asked the owner, "Do you make crab cakes?" And the owner said, "Yes we do."...So the guy said, "Good because it's his birthday."

A man walks into a chip shop with a fish under his arm and asks "Do you have any fish cakes?" "No," replies the owner "we've sold out."
"That's a shame," says the man "it's his birthday."

What do you get if you eat 3.14 cakes? Fat, you get Fat.

What? Were you expecting a pi joke?

When I was young, my mom's sister used to bake me cakes with lots of icing and cream. She was a fond aunt.

What do you get if you eat 3.14 cakes? Fat, you get fat... were you expecting a pi joke?

A man walks into a bar with a fish under his arm... He asked the barman if they sold any fish cakes. The barman said no and the man pouted. “That’s a shame,” he said, pointing to the fish, “it’s his birthday!”

What do you get if you eat 3.14 cakes? Fat. You get fat.

​

You were expecting a joke about pi? On my cake day?

I say to a baker “All your cakes are 50 pence except that one which is £1. Why’s that?” ... “Arhh! That’s Madeira cake!” The baker replies.

Isis have developed isis have developed an explosive prayer mat they are selling like hot cakes.prophets are going through the roof

Weddings are very emotional... even the cakes are in tiers.

How do they call dog cakes in Turkey? Barklava.

This place I know of makes some AMAZING wedding cakes I hear they put in a lot of blood, sweat and tiers.

My girlfriend made me one of those sculpted 3D cakes for my birthday but wouldn't stop reminding me how it took her all day to decorate it.. ..which is surprising since to me it looked like a piece of cake

What do you get... When you cross Aunt Jemima with Uncle Ben?

Rice cakes!

One of the cakes is missing from my German cake stall... ... I'm worried that it was stollen.

I only eat Whole Foods. Whole pizzas, whole cakes, whole family meals.

I ordered a graduation cake for my son. The baker asked me what I wanted it to say. Wow, talking cakes, who knew?

Freddie Mercury offered to cater my wedding, so I asked him how many cakes he’d be making. He said “I want to bake three.”

The baker I said to the baker..
"How come all your cakes are 50p and that one's £1"
He said..." that's Madeira cake"

Why did the shipwrecked pirates get to eat cakes, cookies and pies when they washed up on shore? It was a desserted island.

I made one up. Guy goes to the Doctors

"I have this problem.. I keep seeing cream cakes in the corner of my eye! I look and there's nothing there! Wtf is going on?!"

"Nothing to worry about" Doc replies

"It's just your profiterole vision"

Patient: "Doctor, please help! My stomach always hurt so bad after eating birthday cakes!" Doctor: "For gods sake, then stop eating it with all the lit candles!"

The problem with Easter cakes Is that they take three days to rise.

What kind of cakes do sexists like to eat? Traditional gender rolls.

Excuse are like cakes Fat people are full of them

I don't know about you, but I'd love to volunteer at a battered women's shelter I betcha the cakes they make are amazing

Terrible news! The cakes we buried at the confectionery... are rising from their graves!

The smoothest man on Earth bought a meal in a breakfast joint and asked his beautiful waitress "May I please have the Sussex Cakes ..." (*lowers sunglasses*)

" ... without the *sus*?"

A man walks into a fish and chips shop... Holding a large Salmon. He asks if they make fish cakes.
"Yes, we do".
He holds up the salmon, and the man at the counter responds:
"I'm sorry, but we can't do that".
"But come on," The man responds. "It's his birthday!"

While I was at work, I heard this "Dad Joke" as a father and his kid were walking by. Daughter: Dad, I want a cake pop!

Dad: What's that?

Daughter: It's exactly what it sounds like!

Dad: Oh, it's the father of all cakes?

Dad: \*huge grin\*

What do you call the separate table at Thanksgiving covered with pies, cakes, and cookies? Desserted Island

The secret to having your cake and eating it too 2 cakes