Contents
Contents
What's the police's favorite gaming console? WII U WII U WII U WII U WII U WII U
What was Icarus’ least favorite food? Hot wings.
What is a ghost pirate’s favorite kind of tea?
Boo tea.
(Courtesy of my 6 year old)
My least favorite color is purple. I hate it more than red and blue combined.
What is Pac-Man’s favorite cooking utensil? A wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok
What is Mr. T's favorite month? April, fools
What is Samsung CEO's favorite movie Total recall
What's a pirate's least favorite letter?
Dear sir,
Your internet access has been terminated due to illegal usage.
Sincerely, your service provider.
What's a comedians least favorite drink? Booze
Purple is my favorite color! I like it more than blue and red combined.
In honor of his passing, my dad's favorite joke to tell waiters
Waiter: "And to drink, sir?"
Dad: "I'll have a blind coke."
Waiter: "I'm sorry?"
Dad: "You know, a blind coke. No ice."
What's a pirate's least favorite letter?
Dear sir,
Your internet access has been terminated due to illegal usage.
Sincerely, Comcast.
My wife always accuses me of having a favorite child. It's not true, I love Matthew and Not-Matthew equally.
My wife gave me some bad news today
"But," she said, "I bought your favorite soy sauce to help cheer you up."
"Great," I said. "Just Kikkoman when he's down, huh?"
I'm very soy for that pun. I'll just wok away now.
When is my wife's favorite day to make love? Tomorrow
What's a pirate's least favorite letter?
Dear customer,
We are discontinuing your internet service due to suspicious activity/illegal downloading on your network.
Whats a fedora clad, neck bearded gentlemen's favorite color? M'genta
My 3 Favorite Things My 3 favorite things are the Oxford comma, irony, and missed opportunities
I am so high and I made up a joke and I want to tell it and make someone laugh but no one is home so: Whats an epileptics favorite food?
SEIZURE SALAD.
I peed
As told to me by my 7 YO son this morning...
Him: What's a pirates favorite letter?
Me: ARRRGH!
Him: You would think it would be ARRRGH but my first love be the "C"!
What's a pirate's least favorite letter? Dear sir, we are writing to inform you that you have violated the copyright agreement..
What's a police officer's favorite gaming console? Wii U Wii U Wii U
What is a nice guys' favorite cooking utensil?
M'Ladle
*tips fedora*
Just kidding, it's his mom. He doesn't cook.
What's Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination? HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYEEEEEEEEE
What is matthew mcconaughey' least favorite part of interstellar?
"The girls get older, but he stays the same age"
-first attempt at a original joke (apologies if its a repost that I'm unaware of)
What a pirate’s favorite letter of the alphabet? None of them. Historians suggest that most pirates would have been illiterate.
My daughters favorite joke...
What’s the difference between bird flu and swine flu?
One requires tweetment, and the other requires oinkment.
If you ask me what my favorite rock band is and I'm being subjective, I'd say The Who. If I was being objective, I'd say it was The Whom.
What's a pirate's LEAST favorite letter?
Dear Customer,
Your internet service has been terminated due to copyright infringement.
If I had 5 dollars in one pocket and 5 dollars in the other what do I have?
Someone else's pants on.
My grandfathers favorite joke.
What is a Linux user's favorite game?
sudo ku
EDIT: First post with 100+ upvotes. Thanks all you people :D
What is a cannibals favorite restaurant? Five Guys
Getting my kite stuck in a tree isn't my favorite thing... But it's up there.
What is an english teacher's favorite drink? Tequila Mockingbird
Two wind turbines are talking to each other...
One asks, "What's your favorite kind of music?"
The other turbine replies, "Well...I'm a big metal fan."
What's a vegan's favorite animal? A high horse
I remember my mother telling me, “I have no favorite child.” Harsh seeing as I’m an only child.
I was eating soup one day outside my favorite restaurant and it started raining.. Took me hours to finish my meal.
What is a pirate's favorite letter? You'd think it'd be "R", but me heart belongs to the "C".
What is a Mexicans favorite high school sport? Cross country
I can't even picture my favorite actor going to jail now. But if he does, he'll have to change his name to Morgan Man.
What is a Mexican's favorite novel? Tequila Mockingbird
What’s is a Pirate’s favorite letter of the alphabet? Some believe it’s R but his true love is the C.
What's Kim Jong Un's favorite step of mitosis? Nuclear division.
What's a German's favorite videogame Meinkraft
What’s a cannibal’s favorite kind of noodle? Rawmen
What is a pirate's favorite letter? It's not 'R.' A pirates's true love is the 'C.'
What is a British police officer's favorite gaming console?
WiiiiiiiUUUUUUUUU WiiiiiiiUUUUUUUUU WiiiiiiiUUUUUUUUU
WiiiiiiiUUUUUUUUU
WiiiiiiiUUUUUUUUU
What is Marie Curie’s favorite food? Fission chips.
What's Lil Wayne's favorite pizza? Lil Siezures!
Watching Solo die was my favorite part of The Force Awakens.... Han's down.
What's an incest lover's favorite animal? Aunt-eater.
What is a black dad's favorite animal? Bison
What is Whitney Houston's favorite kind of coordination? HAND EYEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
What's Luigi's favorite dish at a seafood restaurant?
It's a Cala-Mario!
I thought of this joke while I was dreaming one night and laughed myself awake.
What is a resistors favorite breakfast? An Ohm-let
What's a virgin's favorite food? A don'tnut
What's a dentist's favorite time of the day? Five o'clock, because he hates his job and lives for the weekend.
What's Donald Trump's least favorite band? Foreigner
What's a programmer's least favorite bread? NaN bread
What's Harry Potter's favorite way to go down a hill?
Walking.
J.K Rowling
What's a women's favorite thing to play with? My emotions.
What is a feminist's favorite math class? Triggernometry.
What's Sarah Palins favorite water sport? Parah Salin.
What is Donald Trump's favorite vegetable? Leeks
What is DJ Khaled's favorite number? Eleven. Because it has another one.
What's a pirate's least favorite letter?
Dear sir,
We are writing you because you have violated certain copyright laws...
What's a police officer's favorite Star Wars movie? The Empire Strikes Blacks
A teacher asks her class what their favorite letter is…
A student puts his hand up and says, “G, miss”.
The teacher asks, “Why is that, Angus?”
What is Putins favorite song to play for Ukraine? Crimea-River
Bathroom humour is not my favorite type of humour... but it's a solid #2.
What's Whitney Houston's favorite kind of coordination? HAND EYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
What is a chromosome's favorite article of clothing? a pair of genes.
Whats a prisoners favorite punctuation mark?
Period.
Because it marks the end of a sentence.
I love summer in Canada! It's my favorite day of the year!
Whats a feminist's favorite subject in school? Trigonometry.
What's a pirate's favorite letter? The P, without it he's irate
Two windmills are in a field.
One turns to the other and asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"
"I'm a big metal fan" the other one replies.
What's Beethoven's favorite fruit? Ba-na-na-na
I love summer here in Ireland It's my favorite day of the year.
Feminists favorite subject? Triggernometry.
What is a chicken's favorite game to play in the pool? Marco Pollo
What's a kidnappers favorite shoe? White Vans
What's an Ethiopian's favorite book? "My Life And Other Short Stories"
What is Snoop Doggs favorite tool for woodworking? A chizzle.
What is a mathematician's favorite thing to find in the woods? A log.
What is Donald Trump's favorite video game? *Papers, Please*
Donald Trump is about to watch an episode of his current favorite TV show... Orange is the New Black
What's Donald Trump's favorite album to listen to? The Wall
Who Is Jay Gatsby's Favorite Comic Book Character? Deadpool.
A man wakes up from a five year coma...
Doctor: Sir you've been out for a long time and I'm afraid I have some terrible news.
Patient: Oh I don't mind as long as I get to see my favorite gorilla at the Cincinnati Zoo
What is Will Smith's favorite type of forensic evidence? Fresh prints.
What's a fundamentalist Christian's favorite type of car? A convertible.
My favorite tree died earlier. Now I have mourning wood.
What is Whitney Houston's favorite kind of coordination? HAAAAAANNNNNDDD EYEEEEE
What's a stoner's favorite cheese? Mun Cheese!
What's a rednecks favorite part of archaology? Relative dating
What is Unidan's favorite fast food joint? Five Guys.
What is Whitney Houston's favorite kind of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEYYYYYEEEEE!!!!!
My favorite psychic joke Ninja edit: sorry guys I didn't realize this was a repost from tomorrow
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