Hilarious Friendly Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Friendly Jokes

TIL: After Pearl Harbor, US warships fired upon friendly u boats heading back to port. Whoops, wrong sub.

Score: 2145

Score: 1058

AMA: I am a submarine naval commander discharged for friendly fire in an underwater sea battle Oops, wrong sub.

Score: 165

I got $20 from a blind homeless man on the street today! He had this tin can full of money, and was just holding it in front of my face. What a friendly guy.

Score: 143

Since it's so close to Thanksgiving, remember this Give a man some corn, he eats for a day. Teach a man to grow corn, he kills you and steals your land!

Happy Thanksgiving from your friendly, neighborhood Native American!

Score: 85

TIL the excuse the US Marine used in May 1943 after accidentally friendly fire'ing a British U-boat. Woops, wrong sub.

Score: 72

The people on the internet are so friendly.... One guy called me bro, and he even said my story was cool.

Score: 68

TIL that during WWII 3 U.S. submarines sank due to friendly fire. Whoops, wrong sub.

Score: 68

Call of Duty is the most environmentally friendly video game franchise. ... because each game is made from 90% recycled material.

Score: 60

What do you call a fatality that results from friendly fire in a gang war? Homiecide

Score: 54

This sub is extremely environmentally friendly It only uses recycled jokes

Score: 46

I love her eco-friendly body. Very little waist.

Score: 45

What's the kid friendly term for Bukkake? Baby-shower

Score: 43

Imagine a world where nobody is starving A world where everybody is happy. Everybody is friendly. A world with no conflict. No wars. No weapons.

Now imagine invading that world because they would never see it coming.

Score: 39

I make my entire department get the bus to work. It's way more environmentally friendly than those huge gas guzzlers we drive. Makes it hard to get to the fires on time though.

Score: 38

Why are reddittors so environmentally friendly?... Because the recycle everything!

Score: 37

I’m super friendly with 25 letters of the alphabet. I just don’t know why.

Score: 35

What's the most environmentally friendly subreddit? r/Jokes. Everything there is recycled, including this post.

Score: 34

Apple recently created a more child-friendly iTouch. It's called the iTouch-Kids.

Score: 30

What happened to Casper the friendly ghost after his parents got divorced? His mom got soul custody.

Score: 28

I've assembled a list of all feminist-friendly jokes

Score: 25

My friend was too afraid to lose her virginity So I just gave her a friendly tip

Score: 24

Which is the most eco-friendly subreddit? r/Jokes, because 99% of its products are made from recycled material.

Score: 23

I have a new recipe that's gluten free, sugar free, no-fat, non-GMO, pesticide free, low-calorie, vegan, kosher and paleo-friendly. It's a real breath of fresh air.

Score: 19

Why are dyslexic authors so friendly? They don't know the difference between smiles and metaphors.

Score: 18

What do environmentally friendly mathematicians use to make a fire? Natural Logs

Just though of this sitting in class, please don't hurt me

Score: 18

TIL: After Pearl Harbor, US warships fired upon friendly u boats heading back to port. Whoops, wrong sub.

Credit to u/Gagu_1

Score: 18

What place on the internet is so environmentally friendly that the recycling rate is 99%? R/Jokes

Score: 18

I finally understand why vegans are so healthy Because every time they go out they have to walk twice as far to find a vegan friendly restaurant!

Score: 16

What is the most environmentally friendly game company? The three that make Call of Duty; They've recycled their ONLY GAME, every year for the past 7 years.

Score: 15

You would think that atoms bonding would mean they're being friendly to eachother But instead they steal each others electrons.

How ionic.

Score: 8

My Texan friends really seem to love German cars. Every time I see them, they smile, wave real friendly-like and say, "Audi!"

Score: 7

TIL of an incident during the Cold War when American ships, fearing a Soviet attack, nearly fired on a friendly vessel. Whoops, wrong sub.

Score: 6

My wife said I need to start being more environmentally friendly... I could tell she was serious because she said, "This is the last straw!"

Score: 6

Why is the polar bear so friendly? Cause he's an ice guy!

Score: 5

What do you call an eco friendly place that recycles a lot? r/Jokes.

Score: 5

Congratulations /r/Jokes For Receiving The Award For the Most Eco-Friendly Subreddit

Score: 3

Hear about the eco-friendly comedy tour? They recycle jokes.

Score: 3

Want to hear a joke about Subway? Okay, but it's not really kid friendly.

Score: 2

A woman was telling her husband about a new friend she had made The woman said "she's so cool. She's friendly af, chill af, nice af..."

Her husband responded with "well, she certainly sounds afable."

Score: 2

New Friendly Jokes

Stop buying plastic skeletons for Halloween. It’s terrible for the environment. Locally sourced, all natural skeletons are much more environmentally friendly.

Score: 2

I saw my Indian neighbor shake out his rug So, friendly as I am, I got the jump cables and offered to help him start it.

And if that doesn't work, bring it to my garage, I can get anything to run. You could almost say, I have a magic car pit.

Score: 2

why do bees friendly they love BEEing pals

Score: 0

What's the most recycling-friendly music band? Nickelback

Score: 1

Why do we consider chickens as friendly animals? Because they lay their eggs instead of throwing them.

Score: 2

I must say, I'm impressed by the great selection and friendly staff at my local Wal-Mart. It's the only way I'll see my family again.

Score: 2

Did you hear about the friendly golem? He was a Social Construct

Score: 1

Let's start using better, more friendly terms for 'Crackhead', 'Methhead', or the classic: "Wow that guy has done way too many drugs." I prefer 'Pharmaceutically Gifted'

Score: 1

An employee goes to the funeral of his boss that passed away, and decided to give a small speech ''He was the best boss I have ever had, he was friendly, smart and great at what he does... And this says a lot because I have a wife.''

Score: 1

Punch me - *gives friend friendly punch and laughs*

friend- "why r u laughing? how is a punch funny?"

me- "because it was a PUN-ch"

friend- *facepalms*

Score: 2

Where is the most environmental friendly place on Earth? r/Jokes, recycling rate is 98% here!

Score: 2

How do you get a friendly 80-year-old lady to say the F word? Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!

Score: 1

I once dated a model, but I always preferred the earlier versions. This particular one was not very user-friendly, she was high-maintenance and my friends would always borrow her for personal use.

Score: 2