Grape Jokes

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Funniest Grape Jokes

Funny Grape Jokes
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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breathe dammit, BREATHE!

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Why did the woman divorce the grape? She was tired of raisin' kids.

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breathe damnit! BREATHE!!

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? BREATHE!!!

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If you leave a grape out in the sun, it'll shrivel and dry up... Just raisin awareness

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? "BREATHE DAMMIT!!"

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What does a grape say after it's stepped on? Nothing.. It just lets out a little wine

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breathe, idiot! BREATHE!

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What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.

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What did he green grape say to the purple grape? BREATHE!!!

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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it? Nothing. It just gave a little wine.

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I tried to convince the grape that she had dried out... But I just couldn't raisin with her.

I'll see myself out.

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What happens when you step on a grape? It lets out a little wine.

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An old grape farmer There was once an old grape farmer who had went through many droughts. When his grapes had fallen and dried, all he could've said was "Everything happens for a rasin"

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Cutest joke ever What does a red grape tell a purple grape? Breathe, you idiot! Breathe!!

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A German asks a Mexican if they have any Jews in Mexico. The Mexican says, “Sí, we have orange jews, apple jews, and grape jews!”

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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!

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What did the grape say when it was crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.

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What did the grape do when it got stepped on? It let out a little wine.

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What did the grape say after it was stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.

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I stepped on a grape... and it let out a little wine.

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What did the grape say after the elephant stepped on him? Nothing, he just let out a little whine.

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? OMG!!!!!!! BREATHE!! BREEEEEATHE!!!!!

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What does a grape say when it gets stepped on? Nothing, it just lets out a little wine :)

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I bought purple Jell-O mix and now I feel like a superhero. With grape powder comes great responsibility.

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what did the grape say when it got stepped on? nothing, it just let out a little whine

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What did the grape do when the elephant sat on it? Let out a little wine.

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What did the grape say when an elephant stepped on him? Nothing, he just let out a little wine.

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Why did Mr. Grape leave Mrs. Grape? He was tired of raisin kids.

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What does a grape say when you step on it? Nothing, it just gives out a little whine...

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Why did the grape cross the road? No raisin.

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Why would a grape ever intentionally dry up? They have their raisins...

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What did the grape say when he got stepped on? Nothing, he just let out a little wine...

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My friend said he hated grapefruit with a passion. I asked him if he also hates passion fruit with a grape.

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What did the grape say when it got squashed? Nothing; it just let out a little wine.

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What did the grape say when he was stepped on? Nothing. He just let out a little wine.

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Did you hear about the guy who drowned in an ocean of grape juice? He tried swimming to shore but his efforts were fruitile.

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Why did the grape kill itself? It had no raisin to live.

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President Trump to sign an executive action taking aim at Sun Maid and California's Raisin industry He answered most of the criticism over the weekend by stating

"I would like to make raisins Grape again"

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New Grape Jokes

What wall is made of fruit? The Grape Wall of China

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Tony the Tiger is advertising the new fruity cornflakes Theyyyyyyy'rrreeee grape

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??????? What do you call a drunk grape? A cannibal.

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A dried grape began catering for the CIA He was the best raisin agent they'd ever seen

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How do you make sure that your grape ages well? You need to be raisin it right!

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A grape is kidnapped, and dies of hedydration At the funeral, the wife of the grape asks if the policegrape has any leads, to which he responds.
"I'm sorry Ma'am, I can't comment on currant investigations"

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What happens when you rehydrate a raisin before it's ready? Statutory Grape.

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What do you call it when you brew a batch of wine too early? Statutory Grape.

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I saw a wineo eating a grape. I was like "dude, you have to wait"

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What question does employee grape ask of employer grape? "Can I get me a raisin?"

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I am in grape shape... That is not a typo...I'm round.

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breath stupid

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I was once sexually assaulted at a vineyard... It was grape.

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Why does grape juice smell like pig? Because it's wine

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I was reared by a grape. It was tough at first, but once it shriveled up, it was a breeze raisin me.

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What is an Indian's favourite grape? GanGrape.

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What's the worst flavour of grape? Gangrape!

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My wife is like a grape She lets out a little whine.

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What did the grape say when I stepped on it? Nothing, but it gave up a little whine.

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