Gum Jokes

What is the difference between a teacher and a train? A teacher says "Spit out the gum!"
A train says "Chew! Chew!"

Ye, courtesy of my 8 year old daughter.

What does a gun and a pack of gum have in common? Everyone suddenly wants to be your friend when you take it out at school.

What's the difference between a teacher and a train? One says, "Spit out your gum!"
The other goes, "Choo Choo Choo"

How to get gum out of a child's hair? With leukemia.

What is the difference between a teacher and a train? The teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Chew chew!"

I'm thinking about starting a business that recycles discarded chewing gum... I just need help getting it off the ground.

My teacher said, "Are you chewing gum?" I said, "Do I look like chewing gum to you?"

I'm trying out a new idea for using gum that's lost its flavor. Right now, it's just an ex-spearmint.

(Sorry)

What's the difference between a school teacher and a train? A school teacher tells you to spit out your gum, a train says choo choo.

A student brings a slingshot to algebra class and fires gum at the professor It was a weapon of math disruption.

What's pink and hard when it goes in, and soft and wet when it comes out? Bubble gum.

What flavor gum does a scientist prefer? Exspearamint.

inspired by the presidential gum joke.

What do redneck fathers like to chew on? Dad gum

What's the best way to get gum out of your hair? Get cancer.

My son got sent home from school today for chewing gum in class. I had to phone the teacher and explain to her that he's only trying to give up smoking.

What is the difference between a teacher and a train? A teacher says, "Spit out your gum" and a train says, "Choo, Choo, Choo."

When I was a kid I could go to a corner store with a $1 and get 2 cokes, 1 kitkat and a gum Nowadays there are CCTV cameras everywhere

What goes in hard and dry and comes out soft and wet? Chewing gum.

What kind of gum do bees chew? BUMBLEGUM.

Five year olds think it's hilarious. I do not.

What goes in dry and hard, but comes out wet and soft? Chewing gum.

What is a train’s favourite food? Gum. *chew* *chew*

What is pink, hard when it goes in, soft when it comes out, dry when it goes in, and wet when it comes out? Bubble gum. Got this joke from a high school science teacher, one of the weird ones.

What is hard when it goes in and soft and sticky when it comes out? A chewing gum

I went to the store today to buy some coconuts. And a pack of gum, so it wouldn't be weird.

What kind of gum do astronauts chew? Hubble Bubble

How does a train driver operate a train while eating gum? He goes chew chew chew...


creds to my 5yo brother

What type of gum does a Buddhist perfer? Enlightenmint!


More Gum Jokes!

What is a scientist's favorite type of gum? ex-spearment!

At least she didn't say swallow. What's the difference between a teacher and a train?
One says: "Spit your gum out." the other says:
"Chew Chew."

/Badum cshhhh

I want some gum Got any spare-mint?

I have an unopened pack of gum from 1993 You could even say it's in...

..mint condition

So apparently the new fashion trend of the day is to stick chewed gum in your hair It's a unique look but it's hard to pull off.

"I'd like to return this gum, it tastes awful" "Um, sir, those are bandaids."

"I'd like to return these bandaids. I think someone ate some."

Why are the streets of North Korea so clean? Because your life is worth more then a gum wrapper!

Why did the chewing gum cross the road? 'Cause I stepped on it.

Whats the difference between a school teacher and a train? Teacher says "spit your gum out" and the train goes "chew chew chew"

Earth went around the solar system asking the other planets for a stick of gum. They all refused, but Earth still got one; Pluto shares its Orbit.

Jeffrey Dahmer didn't like Tic Tacs or gum. He preferred men toes.

How do you get gum out of your hair? Cancer